Ups and Downs -- Spring Recruitment Story 2010

[fullofhope]

I recently went through spring recruitment! I’m a freshman and it was my first time going through the process. Although fall is usually the time when people go through recruitment, I did not know anything about the process at the time. However, as the year went on, I realized that the girls who were becoming my closest friends were all in sororities. While I never considered joining one, I figured that I may as well give it a try since my friends only had good things to say about the greek system.

I go to a large state school, where greek life is not as competitive as other schools nearby. I think only 7% of students join NPC/IFC organizations. My friends all encouraged me to rush in the spring, though I think one of them wished I had waited until the following fall, as her house was not participating in spring. I’m glad I had their support throughout all of this.

There are 12 NPC sororities on campus, and only 8 of them participated in spring recruitment. Of the 8, I had good friends in three of the houses, with a few acquaintances in the rest. I knew going in to keep an open mind and find the house that I truly felt at home in, as opposed to going in with the mentality of “Oh, I’m going to join my best friend’s house” or “Oh, I’m going to join the top house.” It just seemed silly to think that, since everyone falls in love with different things.

Recruitment was split over 3 days, with the 4th day being Bid Day. Day 1 was all-house party day. After day 1, we had to narrow it down to 5 houses that we liked. Day 2 we would go back to the houses that we had been invited back to (they warned us that we would not get asked back to all 5). At the end of day 2, we would have to narrow it down to 2 houses. And of course, day 3 would be pref.

I’ll be using movie titles as a “code” for the houses. Take them just at face value, they’re all favorites and I love them. They have no significant meaning. Trust.

Fight Club
Top Hat
Amelie
Memento
Pulp Fiction
Gigi
Penelope
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind


So, here’s my story!

Recruitment didn’t start until 4:00 day 1, and I was lucky since my classes let out at 12. After class, I went and got my nails done and finalized a few outfit choices. Then, I spent time getting ready and preparing myself for everything.
We met our rho gammas at the designated spot, and we were handed our schedules! I knew maybe one or two girls in my group, but other than that, it was mostly unfamiliar faces.

We started the day off at Top Hat. The girls were really sweet, and I had things to talk about with all of them. However, it was quite loud so I couldn’t necessarily hear all that they were saying to me...that said, I still walked away with good feelings about the girls.

After Top Hat, we went to Memento. At Memento, I also had a few good conversations, but some of the girls were a touch awkward. I still had fun talking to everyone though (you’ll soon see this is a trend, haha). Honestly, nothing really stood out from Memento, other than the fact that one of the girls I talked to had my major.

After Memento, we went to Gigi. I had met the recruitment chair for Gigi for coffee one day for some COB type event in winter, and knew that she was a really sweet girl. At Gigi, I had good conversations, and clicked with a bunch of the girls. I had a fun time at the house, and managed to laugh a bunch of times.

After Gigi, we went to the house that surprised me the most. I guess it surprised me because I didn't really know many of the girls in it, so I went in with no expectations at all (which was hard to do with the other houses, yet I still tried anyway). We went to Amelie. I only really slightly knew one girl from Amelie, as she is my friend’s suite-mate. I didn’t really know anyone or anything about the house, but I had such a good time there. The girls I talked to were really sweet, and we ended up having a lot in common. Not only that, but I really did feel at home with them. Though it was really premature, I could maybe see myself fitting in with them and staying there.

After that, we had a 30 minute break, during which everyone made sure to eat/use the facilities.

Then I went to Penelope. My best friend is in Penelope, and was one the main reasons that I ended up rushing. Through her, I ended up befriending a bunch of the girls in her pledge class, and a few of the older girls in her house too. I did feel extremely comfortable at house, and ended up talking to two of my friends. It was a really great experience at the end, and I knew I’d have a really great time there.

After Penelope, we went to Pulp Fiction. I had gone to Pulp Fiction in winter for two COB events, and did end up liking the girls, but decided I’d rather go through spring recruitment to get a better feel for all the houses. I had good conversations here, and felt the click, and just had a good time in general.

After Penelope, we went to Eternal Sunshine. I knew a bunch of the girls in Eternal Sunshine, both first years and older girls. I liked them all, but didn’t necessarily know if they were the house for me. I had an opportunity to COB there in winter, but didn’t follow through with it. I was slightly disappointed by the conversations I had, but I knew that sometimes people have off days and since the night was getting to a close, I figured that everyone was just really tired.

The last party of the day was with Fight Club. A girl who lives in my building is in Fight Club, and she loves it. Fight Club is the newest house on campus, having colonized in fall. I was rushed by girls who went to different schools, and that wasn’t ideal, I think, because I wanted to know what sorority life would be like at my school as opposed to theirs.

At the end of the day, I ranked the houses as such:
1. Amelie
1. Penelope
1. Pulp Fiction
1. Gigi
1. Eternal Sunshine
2. Top Hat
3. Memento
4. Fight Club

After that, I went to my room to finish up some homework and just wait till the next day!

[IrishLake]

cant wait for the next installment!

[33girl]

I just want you to go back to Fight Club so their skit can be set in a testicular cancer support group. HAHAHAHAHAHA

(For anyone who has not seen FC, no, I am NOT laughing at cancer.)

[fullofhope]

33girl: Hahaha, yess!! But there sadly weren’t any skits

The start of day 2! I was nervous. Extremely nervous because our rho gammas had told us that there was an extremely limited number of spots open at each house. Although each house had to have more than 7 spots open to participate in spring recruitment, there were maybe 120 - 140 girls going through recruitment. I was just worried in general about getting dropped from all the houses, and even getting dropped from my favorites. The thing our rho gammas kept stressing was that nobody was guaranteed a bid, so it was everyone’s fear to end up without a bid.

We met our rho gammas at the recruitment headquarters, and received our schedules. I had been asked back to my top 5! The only thing that was a bit upsetting was that I had split parties -- meaning two of the parties that I had to attend were at the same time, so I was only going to be able to go to half of each one.
My schedule looked something like this:
Penelope
Amelie
Gig/Eternal Sunshine
Pulp Fiction

I had a great time at Penelope! I talked to a bunch of really awesome girls, and again this was someplace that I could really see myself fitting in. I had great conversations about everything, and it really did feel like home. I can’t recall the specifics, but... I really, really loved how I felt there.

After that, we went to Amelie. At this point, I had a huge “rush crush” on Amelie. After the conversations that I had there that day, I knew that this is where I wanted to pref, and hopefully end up at. I had amazing conversations, and I genuinely enjoyed their little video. It was sweet. I left feeling really happy and with a huge smile on my face; I just felt so at home there.

After that, I went to Gigi. I got a house tour at Gigi, and the girl that gave me the tour was super sweet, I just didn’t really know if I had much in common with her. Regardless, I had a good time, and seeing their house was a bonus.

After that, I had to RUN to Eternal Sunshine in order to not be late -- luckily for me, the houses were on practically opposite ends of the row... When I got there, slightly flustered, the girl that I had been set up to talk to was actually one of my good friends! She hadn’t known that I was going through recruitment, and chastised me for not letting her know. We ended up talking about what we’ve been up to since the last time we saw each other. So it was a great conversation! Then it was time for a video, which was okay. I didn’t think it was too bad.

And my final party of the day was at Pulp Fiction! The girls were super sweet as always, and I ended up having nice conversations there. However, it wasn’t anything too spectacular in my opinion. We also watched a video, which had girls talk about their experiences at Pulp Fiction.

I then headed over to the recruitment headquarters, and filled out the card. Today was the day we narrowed it down from 5 to 2. It’s a drastic cut, I know a lot of people struggled with it. I ranked them as such:

1. Amelie
1. Penelope
2. Eternal Sunshine
3. Pulp Fiction
4. Gigi

After I filled it out, my rho gamma told me that if I were to get dropped, I’d hear by a certain time, and if my party didn’t start until later in the day, then I’d get a phone call too. Having heard that, I walked back to campus, and went to bed.

[bostongreek]

I'm amazed that you could sleep with the threat of the dreaded phone call!

Enjoying your story

[MUSK81]

Me too ... please let us know what happens.

[Splash]

Hey! I am LOVING this story so far and I cannot wait to hear the end!

[fullofhope]

Bostongreek: I may have gone to bed but that doesn’t mean I slept... Haha, I definitely stayed up for hours tossing and turning, extremely nervous and worried.

Day 3 was pref round. I didn’t receive a dreaded phone call! Yay. I got ready with high hopes since I figured I’d be having a good day if I didn’t get the phone call.

I walked over to headquarters, and waited to get my schedule. Thankfully, I’d been asked back by two houses.

However, I’d been dropped by Amelie. The disappointment was intense. I was sitting there, in the room surrounded by other girls -- some who’d gotten their top choices, and others who hadn’t, doing my very best not to cry. I knew that it was silly to stress over it, and that I should instead be glad to be asked back to two houses, but I was still a bit devastated about not getting asked back to Amelie. I racked my brain trying to think of reasons why I had been dropped -- all ranging from “maybe the girls didn’t really like me” to “maybe it’s because I have a lot of friends from a certain house.” I know that it’s unreasonable and crazy to think that, but I was really upset. One of the girls I had talked to the day before had told me that she hoped to see me the next day.

I managed to compose myself (I teared up, but didn’t cry) and tried to make the best out of the situation. After all, I had been asked back to two houses!

The two houses that I’d been asked back to were Pulp Fiction and Penelope.

Pulp Fiction’s ceremony was nice...but it was just that. I was paired up with a girl who was slightly awkward...there wasn’t much to talk about with her, and I felt slightly out of place. They had a candle lighting during which they told us a few blurbs about the sorority. After that, they had us go up to the president and recruitment chair, who then told us how much we meant to them, the girls, and the chapter.

After that, I went directly to Penelope’s ceremony. Other girls had a break that lasted anywhere from 45 minutes to 4 hours.

Penelope’s ceremony was really sweet, and touching. My best friend ended up preffing me, and that really made the whole ceremony very special. We first had a round of conversation, where they gave us desserts, then they took us to a room where they sat us down, and had each girl say why we were so special to them and the chapter as a whole. Many of the girls teared up at various parts, and I can say that I was guilty of that myself when it came to my turn. As I said before, it was really touching.

After that, I got back to headquarters. I sat down in front of the paper to list the houses, and I did not know what to do. I obviously knew where I wanted to end up. The pref ceremony had made that painfully clear. I wanted to be in Penelope, I really did. But I didn’t want to risk the chance of getting Pulp Fiction -- although all the girls were really nice, I didn’t really feel at home there. Throughout all the days, I didn’t particularly feel a connect with them. Everyone had told me that I would feel “it” with the house that was supposed to be home, and I didn’t feel it at Pulp Fiction.

I knew however, that if I suicided Penelope, I would not be eligible for a snap bid, or COB throughout the quarter if I did not receive a bid. However, if I did receive a bid from Pulp Fiction, I knew that I would not be particularly keen to accept it, even though I’d be bound to them for a year. And that would mean I wouldn’t be able to rush again for a full year -- which would be spring quarter of my sophomore year. I didn’t want to drop out of rush and then rush again in the fall, because I didn’t want to be labeled as a “house hunter.” I did truly want to be in a sorority, but in one where I felt I could be at home.

I sat there in front of the paper and I started to cry. I was just so overwhelmed. I had a few options. I talked to a rho gamma about it, and she told me that if I didn’t want to drop out, I should just list both houses, to maximize my options. I would have asked my rho gamma, but she was a member of Pulp Fiction and I felt as though that would be extremely awkward to discuss with her.

I ended up listing the houses as such
Penelope
Pulp Fiction

I gathered my stuff, and walked back to my dorm room where my two best friends were waiting for me. Both are in sororities, but their houses did not participate in spring recruitment. I took longer than I should have in going back to my room, simply because I was so exhausted. Don’t get me wrong, I loved the entire process -- from meeting all the different girls, to just learning about the different houses on campus. I really enjoyed everything, I did. I just didn’t realize how tiring and emotionally exhausting it was until the last day. I ended up sitting next a tree at one point and just crying a little bit more. I wanted so badly to be in Penelope, but I just didn’t know if it end up that way.

My friends tried to reassure me that the process just worked, all I had to do was trust in it. I tried to believe them, but it was tough. They both did love the houses they ended up in, but I didn’t know if I would end up in the house that I knew I could love.

I ended up worrying myself to sleep.

[ADPiTigergurl]

and now I need an ending! jk jk but seriously my name is April and I have a recruitment story addiction

[fullofhope]

The next morning: I didn’t get a phone call from my rho gamma, which meant that I had received a bid. We were allowed to collect our bids at 9 in the morning, from the office of fraternity and sorority relations. Though I didn’t have class until 1030 that morning, I headed down there at 9 anyway. I walked down with my heart in my throat. For some reason, I just did not have a good feeling.

I got my envelope, opened it up, and didn’t have to do anything more than that. I hadn’t gotten a bid from Penelope and I knew it by the colors that I saw on the actual card, as they were Pulp Fiction's colors. I teared up, and handed the envelope, bid inside, to the rho gamma and told her that I declined the bid.

I ended up skipping my class, and going to my room and sitting in my bed watching movies and crying on and off the whole day. My friends were there for me, and they all pretty much thought I should attend bid day (bid day activities wouldn’t start until 5). My best friend in Penelope texted me asking me how my day was going and apologized.

When I left my room get food really quickly at one point, I noticed I had a voicemail from a number I didn’t know. I called back, and it was Pulp Fiction’s recruitment chair. She told me that she understood how I felt, but that she would love to see me at the bid day activities. I told her if I felt up to it, then I’d do my best to make it. But really, I didn’t feel up to it... I didn’t know if I wanted to see everyone and just wanted to say in my room and cry.

Since I come from the area near my college, my parents ended up coming over with a few treats for me. I am the first person in my family to go greek (with the exception of a distant, male, cousin) so my parents didn’t really understand the process and all that; all that they knew was that I was really upset. But my dad told me that since I’d been offered a bid, I may as well give it a try, since it was the courteous thing to do.

I ended up going to bid day, and befriending a couple of the girls. When I got to the house, the recruitment chair sat me down and we had a long talk; she told me about her experience with rush and Pulp Fiction. I figured I may as well give it a go for as long as I can without having to pay.

After all, if the system supposedly works, maybe I did end up where I belong.

I went to the meetings, to the sisterhood events, to a raid, and to a date party. After a few things that made me pause and reconsider, I eventually made up my mind. And here we are today, four weeks later. I recently submitted my first payment and will be filling out my housing contract to live in the house next year. While I still get a bit sad from time to time, I’ve bonded with the older girls in a way that lets me know that they’ll be extremely close friends in due time. I’m still bonding with the girls in my pledge class, and am finding out awesome things about each of them that make me glad to have them as my sisters. Tomorrow is the formal new member pinning too. Oh, and the girl that preffed me? She sent me a message on facebook apologizing for how awkward it all was, which I thought was really sweet.

While I didn’t end up in my top choice, I’m still really happy with where I ended up. Every day that goes by, and every girl I met in my house, I like it a little bit more. I’m sure next year, when I’m living in the house, I’ll truly be in love with the house.

And that’s why I decided to name this story “ups and downs.” Although I was really upset at first, I'm happy now. Which just goes to show, you have to really trust the system and keep your options open. Had I not gone to the bid day activities, and everything else, I know I'd have been extremely bitter about sorority life -- which would have been a big shame. A

I don’t know if it’d be wise to reveal my chapter/school/the code after this, but if you guys don’t think it’d be too bad, I’ll let you all know

[southbymidwest]

I am glad that you gave Pulp Fiction a shot and ended up being happy there. I hope great times are ahead for you and your sisters.

[summer_gphib]

This has been a really great story, and proof that even if you don't get your FIRST choice, where you end up may be the BEST choice.

[Ooh La La]

I'm so happy you gave your sorority a second chance. I'm sure you'll look back years from now with no regrets.

[baci]

Honestly, I think revealing your school and org would be super!

IMO, it shows what amazing young women must be a part of your organization. They welcomed you with open arms and they showed you that they are a darn amazing group of females. They accepted you with your "ups and downs" just as you finally accepted them.

I am extremely glad you are happy where you are and this is another great thread that many can learn from in the future.

Enjoy your time as it will move so fast!!!

[ComradesTrue]

This is a well written recruitment story that shows first hand that new members truly can be happy in a second choice house. Thank you for sharing your journey and best to you in your sorority experience.

I do not think it is necessary to reveal your info unless you just want to.