Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom64
The unhoused sororities are viewed as "less than", the PNMs all basically know to rank them last as getting an invite back is easier, Rho Gams have told them as such.
I am tired of hearing of this mutual selection process. It is not! PNMs rank their choices but are basically given what they get. Why should they have to make "lemonade out of lemons", they are better than this.
In my daughter's case she received invites back from #18, #20 and #21. Guess what, she did a pretty good job of ranking them as after revisiting them she felt no connection and decided to opt out of the process. Frankly, I think these houses may "take what they can get" (there are bills to be paid) which is why they end up with a somewhat "hodgepodge" of a membership.
She has friends who thought they were "top tier" and were quite upset to get invites back from houses they thought were less than that, these were houses my daughter would have loved to have been a part of and ranked accordingly. She is sad to hear them complaining of their invites to these houses and some were her top choices. One of my daughter's friends told me that she found one house to be snobby today but it's really her only choice so she'll take it if she can get it.
And for all of those who feel that they can call our posts "entitled" or "snobby" I dare you to spend one minute if not the many hours we have spent consoling our daughters and reassuring them of their self-worth.
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What I've highlighted above DOES sound entitled (if you mean that they're better than the chapters that invited them back). I'm going to ignore most of your post which insinuates that some of these chapters "take what they can get" and are essentially made up of the "losers" of the Greek system and say this:
We all understand that you're frustrated, but please don't lash out at us because of that. Keep in mind that we're all Greek here, and we're each members of one of the 26 NPC sororities. We hate reading stories where PNMs go bidless just as much as we hate the term "bottom-tier sorority." We feel for both the PNMs and the sororities involved. We want PNMs to fall in love with the sorority from which the receive a bid, whether that's on bid day or years later.
The situation sucks. And in every recruitment situation at every school there are disappointed PNMs. It doesn't get easier to hear, as all of us have to imagine that at least once, that disappointed PNM received a bid from our sorority. And we each love our sorority and we want to share our sisterhood and have others love it as much as we do.
I hope that your daughter can make it through this with her head held high and a bid in hand.