[33girl]

Might I ask why you never knew this until recently?

I mean, if you only found it out now, it's telling me that the fraternity wasn't a big part of his life as the years went on. My friends' kids are all going to know that "Uncle" Tom and Joe and so on were their dad's fraternity brothers...no matter what (God forbid) should happen.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I would investigate further (i.e. ask your mom and his friends) before doing anything.