[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Barbie's_Rush

Well, I think it is a little different once your daughter makes it to pref. By that point, it's obvious that she and the chapter have a mutual connection. I don't even know how an involved alumna mom can even manage to breathe under those circumstances.

I think once a legacy comes to Pref, a mom's biggest concern is not so much if the chapter wants her (because she wouldn't be at Pref if that weren't the case), but whether SHE WANTS XYZ as much as mom wants it FOR her.

You've raised her around XYZ, she has been to more XYZ family events than she can remember, you've discussed what type of badge or whatever that you would get for her if she went XYZ, all that jazz.

You know that she has had a great recruitment and has felt a great connection to XYZ, but that she has also had a great time at her OTHER 2 houses at Pref. You talk to her or text her and all she says is "I had a great time. This is SO hard. Gotta go." You don't want to pressure her or ask her about it, but all you really want to do is ask "on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you think you want to be an XYZ?" lol.

And just as I've heard of moms being livid about their daughter being cut, I've heard of even more situations where mom is furious because Daughter preffed XYZ, but didn't make it her first choice, and got a bid elsewhere.

Often, I don't think parents realize that the choice to rank another group over mom's beloved XYZ is not an easy one, nor does it mean that she flat out "hated" them or anything. She just felt more at home somewhere else.