I think that when you're hearing "it is the Chapter's responsibility to secure recs for the PNMs" that it means that under no circumstance is the chapter to invite a girl to the last round of pref parties UNLESS they have a rec from a Panhellenic alum. I think this is the norm for other sororities too.
Case in point. I used to teach at a small, rural school where very few of the girls went to college, much less through sorority rush. About ten years ago, on a Thursday in August, a alum friend (Chi O) called me late at night to ask me about a girl I had taught when she was in 7th grade! They liked her and apparently had no rec. She was a great girl from a nice family. I think the point is that no one will be offered a bid at some sororites with absolutely no alum rec at all.
But I may be wrong.
Personally, I was proactive with my girls years ago. When each of them was entering 9th grade (high school) I told her that I could not personally get her in a sorority, that they had to be nice, keep their grades up and impress the alum local ladies.
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Originally Posted by Nacre
My daughter was in this boat. She quit rush this year after her one preference party. She felt like it wasn't right for her.
She has a 3.5 GPA, good activities and was a competitive dancer on a national level. Her down side - she is from out-of-state and doesn't know a single person at Bama. We had a very hard time getting recs.
In April, she went to an LSU Panhellenic tea. She was told the group couldn't write her recs because she was going to an out-of-state school. So we asked friends, teachers and neighbors. (Hours of work!!!) I was told by everyone I asked that it is the Chapter's responsibility to secure recs for the PNMs. I was informed over and over that if a house likes a girl and they don't have a rec of file, during rush they will put the girl in a room to meet an alumna. The alumna will interview the girl and then write a rec. Impression is that this is the best way to get a rec. Most friends and neighbors felt like it was a waste of time to write her one.
I'm a Kappa and this spring's issue of The Key had an article about membership. The article stressed that it is the Kappa's responsibility to secure a reference of a girl. Foolish me, I figured Kappa's philosophy was probably the norm.
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