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Old 01-05-2008, 12:11 AM
violetpretty violetpretty is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Coastie Relocated in the Midwest
Posts: 3,196
Quote:
Originally Posted by DGTess View Post
Why shouldn't she drop out early? There's next year if she changes her mind, and if she regrets the decision, well, it was her decision.

As I said, we all live with bad decisions. It's her decision.
Well of course, it's the PNM's decision! Like I said before, they ARE adults, and they are capable of making their own decisions!

Say a PNM comes up to you and says she's dropping out after being dissatisfied with her schedule. I gather you'd be like,"Ok". I would tell the PNM that she has nothing to lose because she might like a chapter that she was only lukewarm about before, etc etc. to give her reasons to stick it out, but of course in no way force her. It's just information. If someone can warn you about making a [potentially] bad decision, you'd appreciate it, right?

I'd liken it to someone telling a teenager to use a condom. You could "let them live with the consequences" without saying a word and let them maybe get pregnant or an STD, or you can explain why using a condom is a good idea. No one can force the teen to use a condom, but information never hurt anyone. If the teen thought that nothing bad could happen while having unprotected sex, then the warning was definitely worth it if they decide to use the condom.

(Disclaimer: I am not implying that dropping out thus potentially ruining one's chances of going Greek and unplanned pregnancy/STD are of equal negativity, but I just wanted to illustrate the point that information never hurt anyone.)

Also, about hiding affiliation, read Honeychile's retro recruitment thread and tell me it was a good thing that her Rho Chi's affiliation was out in the open. Honeychile felt pressured to keep returning to her Rho Chi's chapter, because she didn't want to cut her Rho Chi's chapter in front of her. It made Honeychile resentful. Ok, I get it, "It was her decision, blah blah blah," but why put a PNM in an unnecessarily uncomfortable position?
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