Quote:
Originally Posted by christiangirl
Your eyes got tired and you started thinking about strippers? *blank stare*  Add "tired eyes" to the list of things a woman I date cannot have--right between acrylic nails and heels that are too skinny. They're all equally hoe-ish.
|
This is pretty solid, but it could be even more asinine and everyday, like:
This women nowadays, I tell ya - all they want to do is have sex, enjoy themselves, and vote. Notice how I used the Oxford comma there. Not me, though - I just want a women to settle down, cook pies and shut the fuck up. Notice I did NOT use the Oxford comma there. None of these new-age voting whores for me - hell no. Sexual promiscuity is a scourge upon my 1950s ideals - write it in the sky in gossamer tears: I WILL NOT DATE A WOMAN UNLESS SHE BLEEDS ON MY WEDDING NIGHT, A LA THE DARK AGES. I have not read "Chronicle of a Death Foretold" by Marquez, but if I had, I assure you I would understand the irony.
Whew, I blacked out there - sorry, I got a little out of control.