Quote:
Originally Posted by carnation
I have written 80 zillion billion good recs. I've written only 2 no-recs. Regarding one girl, I had been the chaperone of a group of students who were overseas. This kid tried to pick up French sailors, offended people from various countries with her dress and language, you name it. I don't know if she ever pledged anywhere else.
The other one was a counselor at a Scout camp where my daughters and I work. This girl had physically attacked other counselors, hitting them and even scoring one with her fingernails. My oldest and I both wrote no-recs to our sororities. I heard later that the Greek advisor had talked one sorority into giving her a bid and then from a member of that group that they threw her out a couple of weeks later.
I have never, ever regretted sending those no-recs.
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I think carnation makes some very good points.
Alumnae should reserve a no-rec letter for rare situations with extenuating circumstances. If a young woman who you only feel mildly neutral about asks you for a rec letter, you can always politely decline. The no-rec letter is something to be used sparingly...where you have very real reason to believe that a PNM would be a detriment to the chapter.
No-recs shouldn't be written for trivial reasons - the chapter's membership selection process should work in those cases. No-recs are for situations where its something serious that the chapter is unlikely to discover during rush.