Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueReign
I'm in agreement with you PrettyBoy. And that's not just from a religious perspective but from personal experience. I witnessed my mother being led and totally submissive and it turned me off growing up where I swore I would never be like that. So as determined as I was to "have my own" and "handle it all" I ended pretty darn independent. At 43 years of age, I HATE IT!!
I am thoroughly convinced that God did not design it for women to do it all. I CAN change a flat, paint a room, trouble-shoot my car for problems, break down tree limbs in my yard after a storm, etc. but the thing is I would RATHER NOT! I'm too pretty and delicate because God created me to be a female. (besides I don't want to break a nail  )
Now before you sistas get on me, my stance on this is from personal experience and the lack of males in my life. I think someone mentioned it a page back that a woman can handle all of this and indeed we can, because I did and am still doing it. After the death of my father/brothers/and husband I have had to be the head of my family. Only with God am I able to do it and keep my sanity. I am not just running a household I maintain a house. This is not something I want to do as a female any more.
I am really trying to maintain relationships/friendships with men who step up and are willing to be the men that they were made by our creator to be. So I said all this to say, for the first time in my life I want to be led. |
ETA:
I should clarify that I see control issues with a person who need to run everything. They feel like they need to be validated by being the one in control. Man or woman
Soror, would it be the same thing if your children were adult, and they offered to take care of you?
Quote:
Originally Posted by PrettyBoy
I couldn't have said it better. The last thing I want you ladies to think is that I'm down with ruling women with an iron fist. That's not the right way. Like I said before, she should be involved in every decison, because her input may be better, and a lot of times it is, just not all the time. My X did what she wanted to do, whenever she wanted. She had no respect for me at all, and at the same time, I lost respect for her. When the respect is gone, you can hang it up. I can't respect anyone who doesn't respect me, like I respect them. I can't get down with a woman like that. When a woman feels she has to take on the load, she will get frustrated and lose control everytime, without fail. She was not desinged to do that. I think a man should tell his woman/wife she's beautiful as much as he can, and give her the attention she needs. A man that treats his woman like this will more than likely be able to lead without too much of a problem. Depending on if he chooses the right woman . I just chose the wrong woman. I treated her like a queen and did the best I could with the resources I had available to me, but it wasn't good enough for her. The reason why I'm so picky.
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Interesting that you think this(bolded text).
I'm SUPER picky also and what I find is that men that I have dissmissed (because essentially that's what I did) couldnt step up to the plate. I found that their egos were so fragile, and they were so worried about what their friends would say about their "manhood" and not focus on the actual relationship, that they never had sight of what was really important. To me, they were weak.