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Originally Posted by marquise1911
Yet when I asked brothers to get it together, that is because we honestly need to. All of us have been hurt, but a lot of men use that as an excuse to whore and hurt women. [b]Some men never give anyone the chance to hurt them.[b] Women too have been hurt and because of that they make every man they date a "self fulfilling prophecy". The world is now filled with Bag Ladies and Icebox Men.
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Interesting observation. I don't know your past relationships or if you have been married before, but it sounds like you were unsure of who you really were if you were actually married. That does not mean it is any of my beeswax, just an interesting observation.
I don't know any man that has been hurt so badly that they do not give a woman who might hurt him. I know men that have been hurt. I know women who have been hurt. But that chance to have love seems enough to override all past hurts and bitterness.
Anyone not over his or her past pain in love shows it in numerous ways. A true lover would be a healing one to assist getting past those hurts and pains. Normally, it is one who is experienced, mature and wise. Sometimes it comes from someone who has naivete. Either way, only an astute lover truly wishes the best out of his or her partner.
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My reason for starting this thread was to simply state my observations. I have a chapter of 20 brothers and more friends/associates than I can count. HOW IN DA BLUE HELL CAN I NOT FIND A SINLGE ONE IN A POSITIVE LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP!!!
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A positive long term relationship is difficult to do when neither party lives in denial about themselves. How can one be positive when they live in negativity. Parentless children, lack of positive relationships or marriages--what should a positive marriage exactly look like? So, these days, when the ONLY people fighting for the right to married are the LGBTQ community, how are we as African Americans going to really venture out requesting stability in relationships leading to marriage when over 70% of our children are reared in homes headed by a single parent?
I am NOT knocking folks reared in single parent homes. One cannot help the circumstances in which he or she were born. However, it is something that is just fine in OUR KIND of families...
It is okay to have unprotected sex and as a woman become impregnated by some man, but many women feel they aren't ready or worth it to be married to anyone...
Not to bash, but how come that is not the other way around?