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Originally Posted by 33girl
To say in effect "well, if her sorority would have been smart enough to terminate her, they wouldn't look so bad"? How on EARTH do you justify that in any way? YOU DON'T. Death is not a teachable moment and people who try to make it one are absolutely revolting.
I just hope none of her friends, family or chapter sisters read this thread. It's been full of innuendo, gossip and misplaced blame from beginning to end.
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It seems to me that the death of someone that the audience doesn't know is frequently used as a teachable moment. Now, it's possible that anti-drunk driving and anti-drug use ads are revolting to you, but it seems to be a fairly accepted thing in our culture, going back to horrible drivers education videos back in the day.
I agree that Kevin's post would seem harsh to members of her group and her family, (and personally, I was a little troubled my the "group should cut it's losses" element because I like to think the bond is a little deeper than that) but I doubt he really had them in mind as his audience, seeing the topic of the forum and all.
From the perspective of the group, if you have a sister or brother you know is using drugs, and the sister or brother isn't receptive to quitting or treatment, it does create an extra liability for the group. I think a lot of us think in terms of different categories of users, like recreation user vs. addict, but if someone ODs in the house, like seemed to happen at SMU this year, or has a bad outcome in connection to an GLO event, which seems to fill this forum, it's likely going to be really bad for the group. (It doesn't really matter how frequently or if they've used in the past.) That's part of what the forum is all about.
It doesn't make this young woman's death less tragic for her immediate family, but it's a real example of the risk management issues groups face, and it seems a little odd to come in and bust on this particular thread.