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Originally Posted by crzychx
It breaks my heart to see someone get a bid & not even give the house a chance. God knows how many girls would've loved a bid.
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That may be true, but it is still her choice and I don't think it is our place to give her a hard time for making the decision that she feels is right for her. I give her credit for continuing to post and answer questions!
Quite honestly, I see the potential nightmare in encouraging SIP, but if more PNMs who wanted to SIP, did SIP and were released from recruitment rather than be placed into a chapter someone else may have wanted, we would likely have more committed long-term members. Sure, plenty of women receive their 2nd choice or lower... and end up happy. Even more get their first choice and end up happy. And somewhere along their 4 years in college, they decide they don't want to be part of a sorority anymore, for whatever the reason, and drop.
I'd rather see someone not show up at Bid Day b/c she knows it is not what she wants, then to put up a pretense and spend a lot of time and money, and for the chapter to invest their time and hearts into someone who doesn't want to be there.
I'm not coming down on your crazychx, but I am reading this thread and I feel a lot of anymosity coming from sorority women to this girl. If she hadn't been matched, this thread would be covered with (((hugs))) and regrets and good luck wishes. Instead, we're being critical. Yes, I feel that if you give your 2 or 7th choice a shot you may love it, but that has to be a snap decision you make on Bid Day, and if you're so disappointed and unhappy at seeing your top choice did not make you an offer, you may go home crying instead. Or worse, lock yourself into the bathroom of your new sorority house, spreading your misery to the rest of the happy chapter and new sisters.
So, I'm happy that Rumbly made the decision that this wasn't what she wanted. Maybe she'll rush again and get into the chapter she wants to become a member of; maybe that sorority will be a different sorority than it was this fall. Maybe she won't get into the chapter she wants if she rushes again. But the fact is that this fall is over, and she didn't join a sorority. Let's stop pressuring her. I imagine that this is a hard time for her as it is.