So why can't ex lovers remain friends?
 

You're thoughts. Is it all or nothing. Do you think ex lovers can or should remain friends?

My opinion is flat out NO. It causes too many problems. I can see if they have kids together, but if not, the bridge has got to be broken. Period. Once I'm out, I'm out for good.

From experience,
N-O.

It's not worth it, unless they have kids.

I need closure to be able to move on, and that doesn't always necessarily mean after it's all said and done, we can kick it the way we used to... I'd rather be a cordial acquaintance (sp?) than be a friend

I know quite a few people who are friends with their ex, and it works well.

I personally am not friends with any of my (serious) exs. However, I know if I ever really needed him for something, my most recent ex would be there for me.

I think a friendship can be salvaged if the couple really breaks up... that means no phone calls/texts/emails, hang out sessions, etc. for a while.

However, many people want to transition from lovers to friends immediately, and end up spending as much time together as they did before they ended the relationship. And that often ends in resentment on one side.

But if they take a break to really be apart, I think friendship is possible. At least, it has been for me...

Hell Naw ex-lovers can't be friends. There is a reason they're exes. Keep the drama out of your life.

ditto on what everyone has said.

friendship is the foundation of bf/gf relationships, so when that "something" happens to cause the relationship to end, that means the friendship has been compromised as well.

Even when children are involved, it still takes a lot for a friendship to develop after a relationship ends. Both parties have to be willing to drop their personal differences and move on...and that can be difficult to do.

its worked for me, but there had to be a transition period first...I don't think it can be an automatic change from lovers to friends...

The sex part always gets in the way ~"When Harry met Sally"~:)

If the parting of ways was amicable and mutual, perhaps.

From my experience, however, someone still likes the other person more and feelings get hurt. And if you end up being friends with benefits? Good lord, get ready for drama.

ok, i agree with everything on here, but i also happen to be friends with an ex lover...

YES it is difficult at times, but we were friends that became lovers that became friends. i think the lovers thing in the midst of all that was so that we wouldnt think "what if" and we realized we were better as friends. he and i are very close, i am engaged, he is too, and we respect that. we know to make sure that nothing we do seems or could be misunderstood as intimate, and respect each others partners 100%. i think this could be a lot harder to pull off if the time together as lovers ranges in the years, ours was only 8 or 9 months off and on.

One word: SEX

Yes they can if the maturity level is there. Depends on the circumstances.:)

it REALLY depends.

is it a situation of a real relationship followed by just friendship? if so i think that can work out. i've seen that more than a few times.

or is it a situation where you were just f*%ing and then you want to be just friends. if so - hell no. one of you or both of you is going to keep wanting. and if it keeps happening, well you aren't really friends. and if it stops, well somebody starts to resent. lord its juicy fun though!