advice needed...
 

So I met this guy via match.com. He contacted me. I liked his profile and we started emailing. Well last Monday we went on our first date. Well, I guess you can say it was a typical first "blind" date. The conversation was awkward and slow. There were times where I felt I was carrying the whole conversation and like I was talking to much. The silence was uncomfortable. He was very nice and respectful though, so when he asked me on a second date I agreed, figuring I should give him a second chance.

Today was the second date and yeah I was counting down the time until the date ended. I hate to say that. I was so uncomfortable. It was awkward. There was literally a time where we didn't talk for like 6 minutes (we were waiting in line for a ride).

My question is, how do I tell him I'm not interested in dating him? In all honesty I've never been the "rejector". I don't want to sound mean, but how do I tell him, nicely, that there is no chemistry between us. I mean I wasn't attracted to him in any way, physically, mentally, emotionally, sexually, nothing. And I've been on dates where I've had the attraction, just not with him. He's a great guy, he's just not the guy for me. I don't want to lead him on, but I don't want to be harsh either.

If he calls you to ask for another date, just tell him the truth. Say something like, "I think you're a really nice guy, but I just don't feel any chemistry between us." If he gets all weird and protests or whatever, then say "I'm just not that into you." haha.

At least you are feeling the NO. With the last guy I dated, though I certainly was not attracted to him (and my friends pointed out they could tell about the lack of chemistry in various dimensions from the way I talked about him- physical, mental, emotional), I was not quite feeling a strong NEVER either.

When this guy declared his feelings for me at the end of the third date (which I really had to ponder about going to, and which I prevented from being prolonged even though I did not cut it short), I told him that my feelings were not at that level but that he was a great person and absolutely nothing in his essence/status/actions/omissions is responsible for my not feeling the same way for him. That you are just not feeling any chemistry.

Definitely don't force yourself. Especially if you are feeling a definite clear NO.