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Sponsoring a PNAM from the internet
We have previously debated about supplying PNM we only know via the internet with recommendations for recruitment. Well, what about PNAM?
If I remember correctly, the general consensus was that most women were uncomfortable providing a rec for a PNM they didn't know in real life, or at least didn't talk/email a few times. Do you feel the same way about PNAM? Does the fact that they have graduated make them more mature and therefore, easier to support without knowing the woman? Thoughts? |
I am not sure how anyone, in good conscious, could provide a recommendation or sponsorship for someone they have not met in person. I view a recommendation as giving my word that this person is suitable for whatever purpose the rec is for, and I would not want to jeopardize my reputation (or my organization's for that matter) for someone I only know online.
It's like people who say that want to get married to someone they met online before they actually have met them--how often does that REALLY work?? |
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I would never even consider providing sponsorship or any type of recommendation for someone pursuing AI if I have not met and gotten to know her, IN PERSON. Ever. I think that is completely inappropriate.
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I've written recs for PNMs I don't know personally (usually things like, "her resume seems impressive and I know her cousin, a lovely woman, well") but those are for women who are vouched for by people I know in real life.
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I would not recommend anyone for undergraduate recruitment nor would I sponsor/recommend/introduce someone for AI unless I knew them personally or were introduced to them by a close friend or family member.
If my cousin were to call me up and say "Hey, my best friend is going through recruitment at State U, she's an amazing girl, can you write her a rec?" then of course I'd call, email and IM the PNM to get to know her. Would I write a rec if some random internet person were to email or PM me out of the blue? Not a chance. Same goes for AI -- actually more so. I guess I feel that by introducting a PNAM to your group, you are saying "I personally vouch for the character, integrity and ability of this woman to successfully integrate into this sorority." That's a huge responsibility for you to shoulder, and you look irresponsible if the PNAM turns out to be a bad fit. If I personally knew someone who exemplified the ideals of my sorority and would be willing to place my reputation on the line because this woman would contribute so much to AXO, then that would be the only situation in which I would recommend someone for AI. |
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See more of my thoughts in: "As an alumna, how WELL should you know a PNM in order to write a RecForm/Sponsorship? " http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=18519 |
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Hmmm...
I met one of my sponsors originally from Greekchat. We went out for lunch, just the two of us and took it from there. From there I met a slightly larger group of alums and then a lot of the rest of the chapter. Was this the ideal way to meet my sponsor? Likely not but it worked for us. I wasn't aware of it at the time but my initial contact was our alumnae chapter president at the time. However, I didn't contact anyone other than Gamma Phi and had already done a lot of research before making contact. I also didn't broadcast my AI journey until about a week before initiation although my sponsor had mentioned me.
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No. If she was local to me, I would consider meeting with her in person and then decide how to proceed.
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No, I feel that AI is an honor and should be used selectively. So, there's NO way I would sponsor someone from the interweb.
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Just as I would never write a rec for someone whom I've never met and REALLY gotten to know (in person) I would never sponser someone I've never met and REALLY gotten to know (in person).
I may just be picky, but I don't think email counts as "talking to" a person. Yea, it's a form of communication, but just like in job interviews, anyone can look good on paper and interview well. It's the actual getting-to-know the real person that is what counts. In my company, we had a couple of people who looked fantastic on paper and had great interviews. They got the job, and ended up being crappy employees. The work enviornment is different because typically you don't have the luxury of waiting very long to fill the position, so you cant meet up with them on several occasions to learn who they really are. Fortunately for recruitment/sponsership purposes, you do have the ability to do that. |
I wouldn't mind putting someone in touch with a local contact, but it's up to those people from there to determine if it could work.
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Double ditto.
I'd even say, Hey, I really like her, she's really interested in ____ etc. IF I was contacting the alum chapter myself. Of course I could also say, I know she's interested, but I kind of question ________. So, works either way. |
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