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-   -   should i stay...or should i go? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=113948)

jojocircus 05-26-2010 04:49 PM

should i stay...or should i go?
 
hi,
i'm not looking for anyone to give me a definite answer, b/c i know that's not possible, but i am in a very strange situation regarding "my" sorority. i say "my" b/c i was never officially initiated..and recruitment is coming up.

sorry...im trying to find the words to explain my situation, but basically due to a number of things i was not initiated and its supposed to happen in the fall. i should be excited abt this, however they were not my first choice..or even my second. i said i would except the bid b/c i thought i would get my first choice(not smart/nice i knw)everyone kept telling me to just go through new member period to see how i felt...now they're telling me to get initiated and see if my feelings change as an active. problem is if i get initiated thats it. if i dnt like it i cant go anywhere else so now is my only chance. it is not as if these are bad girls, or if i dont believe in some of the things they stand for, but i always thought the sorority you are in is supposed to feel like"family" and when i go to my sorority house it should feel like home. i have yet to make any true connections(its been a year!) should it be this hard? how did you feel when you accepted you bid?how do you feel now?

i knw this was a lot to read so any advice, or experiences would be greatly appreciated

knight_shadow 05-26-2010 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jojocircus (Post 1935262)
hi,
i'm not looking for anyone to give me a definite answer, b/c i know that's not possible, but i am in a very strange situation regarding "my" sorority. i say "my" b/c i was never officially initiated..and recruitment is coming up.

sorry...im trying to find the words to explain my situation, but basically due to a number of things i was not initiated and its supposed to happen in the fall. i should be excited abt this, however they were not my first choice..or even my second. i said i would except the bid b/c i thought i would get my first choice(not smart/nice i knw)everyone kept telling me to just go through new member period to see how i felt...now they're telling me to get initiated and see if my feelings change as an active. problem is if i get initiated thats it. if i dnt like it i cant go anywhere else so now is my only chance. it is not as if these are bad girls, or if i dont believe in some of the things they stand for, but i always thought the sorority you are in is supposed to feel like"family" and when i go to my sorority house it should feel like home. i have yet to make any true connections(its been a year!) should it be this hard? how did you feel when you accepted you bid?how do you feel now?

i knw this was a lot to read so any advice, or experiences would be greatly appreciated

You've been a "new member" for a year and haven't been initiated?

Senusret I 05-26-2010 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow (Post 1935263)
You've been a "new member" for a year and haven't been initiated?

That's some foolywang right there.

KSUViolet06 05-26-2010 04:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jojocircus (Post 1935262)
hi,
i'm not looking for anyone to give me a definite answer, b/c i know that's not possible, but i am in a very strange situation regarding "my" sorority. i say "my" b/c i was never officially initiated..and recruitment is coming up.

sorry...im trying to find the words to explain my situation, but basically due to a number of things i was not initiated and its supposed to happen in the fall. i should be excited abt this, however they were not my first choice..or even my second. i said i would except the bid b/c i thought i would get my first choice(not smart/nice i knw)everyone kept telling me to just go through new member period to see how i felt...now they're telling me to get initiated and see if my feelings change as an active. problem is if i get initiated thats it. if i dnt like it i cant go anywhere else so now is my only chance. it is not as if these are bad girls, or if i dont believe in some of the things they stand for, but i always thought the sorority you are in is supposed to feel like"family" and when i go to my sorority house it should feel like home. i have yet to make any true connections(its been a year!) should it be this hard? how did you feel when you accepted you bid?how do you feel now?

i knw this was a lot to read so any advice, or experiences would be greatly appreciated

There are actually quite a few threads around here about similar topics, I suggest giving them a read because your feelings are not uncommon (not knowing whether you want to stay or go). There is some good advcie in them. Good luck to you with your decisions.

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...d.php?t=112091

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ghlight=choice

ree-Xi 05-26-2010 05:03 PM

I know that this isn't done much anymore, but at some chapters/schools, initiation held over until you come back from the following semester (for grade purposes). If you don't have the GPA when initiation comes, you are held over (and have to re-pledge) until the next semester's grades are out (if they improve).

My school and chapter (AXiD) did this. I don't know how common this is or if that still happens (formal recruitment is now deferred for freshman), but it was normal for all chapters on my campus at the time.

Not sure if this is the same issue, but I wanted to share my experience.

IrishLake 05-26-2010 05:05 PM

I also do not understand how you can be in a new member pledge period for a year. Is this an NPC org, or NPHC?

Senusret I 05-26-2010 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IrishLake (Post 1935277)
I also do not understand how you can be in a new member pledge period for a year. Is this an NPC org, or NPHC?

I am sure that my fraternity wouldn't have someone in a "new member" or pledge period status for that period of time. I would put money on no other NPHC org doing it either.

IrishLake 05-26-2010 05:12 PM

I should have included Local. I HOPE it's a Local! Otherwise.... yikes!

Drolefille 05-26-2010 05:21 PM

Possible a local, possible a weird NPC grades or late in the semester COB situation, either way do what makes you happy but know either way your decision's final.

Gusteau 05-26-2010 05:48 PM

Too easy.

KSUViolet06 05-26-2010 05:56 PM

Is it sad that I spend so much time with small children that I know exactly who Jo Jo is?

knight_shadow 05-26-2010 06:00 PM

^^^ The singer? Or am I more out-of-touch with the youth of today than I previously thought?

KSUViolet06 05-26-2010 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow (Post 1935347)
^^^ The singer? Or am I more out-of-touch with the youth of today than I previously thought?

No. I'm thinking a LOT younger. lol.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/JoJo's_Circus

knight_shadow 05-26-2010 06:05 PM

^^^ Haha, OK. I thought there was a new Beiber-esque sensation that had popped up.

BabyPiNK_FL 05-26-2010 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 1935341)
Is it sad that I spend so much time with small children that I know exactly who Jo Jo is?

Is it sad that I took a picture with JoJo and her lion (by myself) at MGM about 5 years ago?


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