lame pick up lines
 

Hi,
I'm curious to know the funniest pick-up lines you've ever heard. It's amazing what some people are willing to say to members of the opposite sex.

I'll start. I was up at my best friend's cottage and we were at the local bar just dancing and enjoying ourselves. She walked away from me for a second and this guy came up to me and said, 'excuse me, are you from Tennessee?' i of course said no, cause i'm not, and he replied 'cause it's a ten i see!'. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif LOL. i couldn't help but laugh. I tried so hard not to but common! what was i gonna do? swoon and fall for the guy. it was pretty funny.

Anyone have any other priceless pick-up lines to share http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/tongue.gif ?

Leslie

My husband has a new one that just made me roll when he dropped it on me. We have EXTREMELY busy lives which involves a lot of travel and not much "together" time. Well we were visiting my parents this weekend (you know - on your P's and Q's). Well we went downstairs to unpack, and he practically yells to me:

"Hey - why don't you give me some, 'cause I know you got it with you!"

I could have died! I am sure my parents probably heard him (I can only imagine that conversation) and just laughed so hard about it.

Anyway, I thought it was WAY too funny!

Not used on me, but one of my friends...

"The clock's in the bedroom. Let's go see what time it is."

HAR HAR HAR!! Yeah, I wouldn't be able to resist that kind of wit!

LMAO!! that is HILARIOUS!!!

lame pick-up lines...HMMM...this happened to me at a party recently:

he: Has God been looking for you?
me: (slightly agitated cuz I know where this is going) not that I know of, why?
he: Because heaven is missing an angel"
me: http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif oh really **walking off & shaking my head**
he: (yelling after me) you ain't all that anyway!!

Note to the men: DO BETTTER!!! A simple "Hello, how are you today/tonight?" usually works just fine.

About a year ago, I was a party when some slimy guy came up to me and whispered in my ear, "My name is Matt. That's so you know what to call out later tonight." And, then he winked at me. I laughed in his face.

Ladies, please give us a break its HARD to go up to a total stranger and start talking. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/mad.gif

How often do you do it and what do you say? http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

Also, unless the guy is a complete moron those lines were probbaly designed to get your attention. Also, on behalf of my gender, I am embarrassed to admit this but . . . when you laugh we think you liked what we said and are laughing with humour . . . http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif

By the way the most common (at least i assume they were pick-up lines) pick-up line I have recived from girls is "Don't I know you from somewhere?"

[This message has been edited by James (edited March 07, 2001).]

Guy,"Excuse me but do you have 35 cents?"
Girl,"No, why?"
Guy,"That's too bad. My mom told me to call home when I fell in love."

NOTE: A guy at a church thing used this one on me. We're great friends now...although I wouldn't mind something more (he's a hottie and my mother loves him) http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif

Hootie

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What do you get when you cross and Alpha Omicron Pi and a Sigma Phi Epsilon? A beautiful Chi Omega!!!

I think you're right about the line being more of an attention getter than anything else.

I was at a local bar (well, really it's a hole in the wall, but i digress) with a bunch of my sorority sisters, and some guy actually went up to one of my sisters and said 'hey wanna get a 2-4 (what we canadians call a case of beer) and F**K?'.

I'm sure he said it for the shock value, but I swear this guy was serious. She laughed in his face and walked away. I sincerely hope he didn't think she found it endearing! LOL

Here's my favorite, and I got it out of a book:

dude: Wanna trade?
girl: Trade what?
dude: A piece of me for a piece of you.

Man, I absolutely love that line. It's a good conversation starter, I think. That is what a pick up line should be, witty, light, funny, and thought provoking. I don't mind the pick-up lines, as long as ol' dude ain't serious. If they are just used to get my attention or make me laugh, cool. But if they really believe that lame mess they spittin', please. Save it for the next one, and later for ya.

So it worked? I'm just curious, do you live in VA? Cuz here the phone price for pay phones went to 35 cents a few years ago.

ROFLMAO as I flashback to my first year of teaching. I teach English and my students keep a journal and they have some free choice meaning they can write about whatever they want. Well one of my freshman decided to do a journal about pick up lines and my absolute FAVORITE is this:
I'm not Fred Flintstone but I can make your BED ROCK!!!
3 years later and I am still LMAO.

Here is a website that offers PICK UP LINES: http://linesthataregood.nstemp.com/

***Disclaimer***Knowledge of the following pickup line DOES NOT indicate the person posting this has ever used it***

OK, now with that formality out of the way - one of the funniest lines was all the rage on campus back in the late 80's (yes, I know I'm old...shut up already...)

"Why don't we go back to my dorm room and do all the things I'm going to tell everyone we did anyways?"


***Final Disclaimer***Use of the forementioned pickup lines is NOT encouraged - serious mental and physical harm can result***

...or at least that's what I heard...

LOL...too funny, LXAAlum! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif




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@-->---
Pure as Silver, and True Blue!
Alpha Sigma Kappa - Women in Technical Studies

Junior year in high school, at the Baskin Robbins:

Me-Hey
her-hey
Me-You got a man?
her-yeah
Me-So I got a back ache, I mean we all got problems
her-that'll be $3.89

This one was used on me LAST NIGHT:

Here's the scenario--I was at my grandmother's condo, and I was walking out the door, and these two guys walk by and one says, "Good evening"...and me being the nice person I am, replied back. The guy continues to try to make small talk, and then cuts to the chase, and asks me if I have a man, and I was like, "Yeah..." This dude then whips out his business card and says to me that I need to have a spare. I then proceed to have this blank look on my face, and get this, this man said to me, "Well, you got a spare tire for your car in case your tire goes flat, right? Well then in case your man doesn't act right, I can be your spare man!" http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif that was a new one for me.

PrettyPetite

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHA

Okay, here's a really really bad one:

I was in a drug store buying a chocolate milk when a man, about 50 years old came up to me and said, "milk does a body good, I could do your body good so why don't you give me your number". Now mind you I was only 17 at the time, I swear there are pedophiles lurking around every corner. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

CT
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"Only passions, great
passions can elevate
the soul to do great things"

--Diderot
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[This message has been edited by CarmelTreat (edited March 08, 2001).]

THAT was good!!!! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif lol.

This one is horrid:
Guy: "How much does a polar bear weigh?"
Girl: "I don't know"
Guy: "Enough to break the ice...Hi, I'm _____ ".

Isn't that the WORST????

Here are a few:

"Is your name Gillette? ...Because you're the best a man can get."

"Is your dad a terrorist? Because you're the Bomb!"

"Are you a parking ticket? Because you have FINE written all over you!"

"I want to pour milk all over you and make you a part of my Complet Breakfast"

"Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only Ten I See!"

"When does your Centerfold come out?"

"Is it hot in here? Or is it just you?"

And of course, the truly tasteless ones:

"The word of the day is legs...let's go to your house and spreadthe word"

"If your left leg is Thanksgiving and your right leg is Christmas...can I visit you between the holidays?"

"Is that a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them"

that is a definitely good one...i must pass that one to a few of my men friends...

*LMDSTAO*


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MaMaBuddha

Devastating
Stimulating
Tantalizing
_________________________

Imaginer un métro rempli avec les anges tombés...

Reminds me of the time a guy asked me if I was the "Jet Beauty of the week" from last week http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif



[This message has been edited by toocute (edited March 09, 2001).]

After reading this again...these are kinda cute. LOL.



[This message has been edited by toocute (edited March 09, 2001).]

LOL. That is TOOOOOOOOO funny. Where do people come up with these things?

LOL these are just too funny http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

PrettyPoodle, my gosh, that has to be the pickup line i have ever heard of!!!

The ones that were used on me:

"Is your father a pirate? I swear he is, that's why your eyes are such a pretty starry black." http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

yes, this is an infamous one: "Do you have 35 cents? Cuz my mother told me to callhome when I fall in love."

The guy (skeevy-looking): What time is it?
Me: I dont know, it's time for you to get a watch.
The guy: Well you better know the time.
Me: EXCUSE me????
The guy: Cuz it's time for me and you to get it on, baby.
Me: To be honest, I really prefer humans. Why did your zookeeper let you out anyway? (HEE HEE!!)
The guy: Well, you know that you prefer animals anway. I'm an animal in bed.

AHHHHHHH!! Save me, LOL! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif

Guys, please, save yourself the embarassment and do NOT do NOT, i repeat, use lines like those. You will only get eye-rolls and disgusted looks from girls who will tell their girlfriends how slimy you are. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif Seriously, a nice "hi" works for me if i'm attracted to you! Pick-up lines are soo annoying...it's like, c'mon is that the only way you can get our attention? Definitely not. In my opinion, that is the worst way to get our attention.

I would rather a guy clumsily, gently bump into me (of course not with a drink in your hands LOL!!) and say "oh i'm sorry!" share a few laughs, then introduce yourself! It's really not that hard to get our attention with respect http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Yeah, I've never used lines myself in the past. I know its all for fun. I guess I'm no fun in that regard, but it just doesnt seem me. Of course I'm not much of a talker when I'm at the bars anyway. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif If I go to a bar I rarely if ever dance either. Most of the time I'm seen at the table or at the bar.

Kevin

Okay, now this is gonna require a certain amount of honesty, but we're all friends here aren't we?

For those of you GreekChatters who are attached, or even for those of you who used to be, were any of you 'picked-up' by someone who started off by using a 'line'? And, if so, what was it?

I know they have to work on some people, otherwise they would have disappeared from all social interaction a loooooooong time ago http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif .

Leslie

It wasn't a line per se, but rather the whole "bet" scenario. I had met "Jack" a couple weeks into the sememster, but it was just a passing thing when my friend had introduced us out on campus (ie, not like a set-up type of intro thing). Anyway - I'm leaving this frat party, and I hear my name SCREAMED across the lawn -- I turned around and Jack throws his arms around me and swings me around. I was dying laughing and he ended up walking me to my car which was WAY far away (and of course it was like 2am).

I thought he was being so sweet -- after we became serious his pals told me that when they saw me they were talking S$i% and Jack said he knew me and they bet that he didn't...and that the whole walking me to my car thing was supposed to be the get-it-on quickie (kind of like the women's bathroom scene in Top Gun).

Anyway...just my randomness for the day! I still can't believe I fell for it and was too stupid to understand the giggles and laughs that were thrown my way when I showed up at his room the next day (ie, seconds anyone http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif )....but we're now married http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif



[This message has been edited by AXO Alum (edited March 12, 2001).]

LMAO!!! LMAO!!! LMAO!!! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif

-Guy falls flat on his face! Stands up and says to my friend "I've fallen for you!"
-"Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?"
-"If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put I next to U."
-Him: "Did it hurt?"
Me: "What?"
Him: "When you fell from heaven."
-"Can I stand next to you? I farted over there.

Okay well i dont think this would be sexual harassment or anything, but about 2 weeks ago i was at work....
i work at a children's private montessori school and like a daycare for the 18mths-5yr. old. Anyway i work in the front office and i just basically sit there and greet the parents when they come in to pick up their children.....
well this dad came in and as normal i was like "hi, how are you?" and he says "okay, how are you?" so i say "pretty good" and he replies with "yeah, pretty and good!!"
After the said that i was kind of in shock and didnt say anything. I didnt want to say "thank you" or anything of that sort! It did kind of bother me, but he has never said anything like that to me. He has always been really friendly- but mainly all the parents are.
I mean- if this came from some of my guy friends or any guy at school my age- i would think it would be funny or cute, but the thing is that this man has two kids- he's not 50 or anything but atleast 30. What do you guys think about this?

My current boyfriend had a thing in high school - he would ask every girl he met to marry him - he wanted to have 100 "wives"

One of the first things he said when he met me was "Hi, my name is Josh, I've never killed anyone, will you marry me?"

It wasn't a pick-up-line per se but it made me laugh. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Still being in high school myself, I still hear all the worst of them! I've heard one kind of like that-

"You must wash your clothes in windex because I can see myself in your pants."

ALSO:

"You must be a farmer, because you raise a lot of cocks."

AAAH, the amazing humor of 9th grade boys... I wonder if they actually think this stuff makes girls swoon?!

ok...here's a good one. Not exactly a pick up line, but good for a few laughs:

Go up a woman.Say:
"I bet you 50 cents I can make your breasts wobble without touching them."

After her general sounds of disbelief, grab breasts and wobble them for a few seconds.
Hand over 50p/cents.
Admit defeat.

This is one that will repel any female:

You: Hey, do you have any black (or white) in you?

Her: Why, no.

You:Would you like some?

SLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPP!

What craziness...being a guy..i usually just approach a girl and ask how she is doing, if she is having a fun time, and ask her what her damn name is, and remember it!

Some lines my friends have used:
This one my friend got slapped so hard he flew into a wall,
"Girl, if we were squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?"<---that's just jacked up.

http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Guys....listen...you want to talk to a girl, ask her how she is doing, get her name and remember it and if she's drunk, stop trying to get her to come home with you, if she likes you, she will remeber you in the morning, so always exchange numbers just in case.

Blaine

here's one I just though of. It won't be my opener or maybe it will, it depends. I'll try tomarrow night. "Jesus died for our sins, so lets go get his money's worth."

Here's a classic, definitely gotten a man slapped once or twice:

YOU: (look at wrist, even if no watch) my magic watch says you're not wearing any underwear!
HER: well, i am . . . (usually at least)
YOU: (tap wrist . . . ) well . . .hm . . . oh - it's an hour fast!

good for some laughs

Heres one.....but of course I've never used lines in the past. As I've mentioned before. Anyways, I just made this one up.

You take care of this and I'll make breakfast http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

here are some dumb lines..... http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif

Hey baby you're so fine you make me stutter, wha-wha-what's your name?

Is your name Pepsi cause' I've gotta have it.

Which one of the Spice girls are you?

My love for you is like diaharrea, I just can't hold it in .

Did your father have sex with a carrot? Cause you've got nice eyes.

I have a .357 magnum pointed at your kidney. Wanna go get some coffee?