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-   -   Gays in fraternites (pt. 2) (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=95740)

nittanyalum 05-12-2008 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernFratter (Post 1650296)
You're quick. It was a Holocaust joke.

Oh, well, double-fail, then. My joke was funnier.

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 10:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bowsandtoes1000 (Post 1650292)
and the older brothers move their fratting to more private areas. :D

hehe....

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernFratter (Post 1650272)
And I would hope that I don't attract gay men, not really who I'm going for.

Right so the gay men might not look at your penis more than the straight men do, right? The sight of you may repulse them.

Oh and you know your straight brothers look at your penis because they have to rank their penises against yours. Well, maybe they are straight and maybe they aren't.

Communal showers are why the rushees flock to your chapter. :)

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 10:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernFratter (Post 1650304)
That's not prejudicial. It's a fact that the defining characteristic of a gay man clashes with both my beliefs and what I'm hoping to get out of the fraternity. One of the main functions of the fraternity is to do things with GIRLS. What the hell are we gonna do for him, have a social with the "Balanced Men" of SigEp?

Fact or fiction, still prejudice.

You do know what "prejudice" means, right? We all have them, just depends on the topic and what's at stake. You wouldn't tell a gay employer how you feel about gays.

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernFratter (Post 1650308)
Of course you'd know that, if NPHC chapters had houses. So sorry, stick to topics you know. Like incorporating things.

Well, that certainly hurts. Good job again.

Some NPHC chapters have houses. There's a thread about it here. But NPHC fraternities tend not to have 50+ members and a need to have communal showers in their houses. I guess that sucks for them.

Yes, I do know about incorporation. Thanks for noticing that.

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 10:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernFratter (Post 1650309)
No, I wouldn't have applied for a job working with him in the first place.

Yeah, grow up. ;)

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bowsandtoes1000 (Post 1650315)
That's childish and you know it. One of the things we pledge for is friendship and bonding, and it's considerably harder to bond with my brother when I have doubts over whether he may be sexually attracted to me. That possibility may be low, yes, but the doubt is there. It's not prejudicial as in I discriminate against someone for an arbitrary reason, i.e. skin color (although I don't want to get into that), rather it's judicial based on information I know, i.e. he's sexually attracted to men.

I was being honest just as you all are.

This was a cute attempt at a distinction. I mean that. :)

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bowsandtoes1000 (Post 1650323)
That was a "cute" attempt at a counter-argument.

No counter-argument is needed. You really think there's a difference so that's that. :)

ETA: Your attempt at a distinction was cute, though, so I did smirk.

DSTRen13 05-12-2008 11:07 PM

If you did have a mixer with another fraternity (SigEp or otherwise), you might be surprised how many girls would be interested in that :p

DSTCHAOS 05-12-2008 11:11 PM

:confused:

nate2512 05-13-2008 12:21 AM

We had a guy this semester pledge with us. His girlfriend was extremely good looking so no one thought anything of it, halfway through the pledgeship his girlfriend walks in on him with another guy. Pledgeship terminated.

Now call us ********, but we just plain aren't comfortable with having a gay in our fraternity.

SthrnZeta 05-13-2008 01:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nate2512 (Post 1650361)
We had a guy this semester pledge with us. His girlfriend was extremely good looking so no one thought anything of it, halfway through the pledgeship his girlfriend walks in on him with another guy. Pledgeship terminated.

Now call us ********, but we just plain aren't comfortable with having a gay in our fraternity.

Seriously??? What year do you live in? :eek:

SthrnZeta 05-13-2008 01:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernFratter (Post 1650362)
^
It was the right move. Not just gay/bi, cheated on his girlfriend with a dude.

:eek:

nate2512 05-13-2008 02:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SthrnZeta (Post 1650408)
Seriously??? What year do you live in? :eek:

Are you kidding me? The same year where gay marriage is still illegal, just how it should be. The thought of two men kissing or doing anything else just disgusts me to no end. I'm not comfortable with gay and I'm not going to make any apologies about it.

brunetteddd 05-13-2008 02:46 AM

Personally, I have no issues with people being gay (and if I had a sister who was a lesbian, it wouldn't bother me in the least). However, fraternities are private organizations and have the right to allow or deny anyone from membership, just like if a fraternity is having a party and doesn't want someone to come in - it's a private function.

Now, whether or not you think that the reasoning behind it is legitimate or bigoted, you have to admit - that's their prerogative.

PhiGam 05-13-2008 03:26 AM

Due to the nature of pledgeship and whatnot, I can understand fraternities discriminating against gays.
I personally have no problem with them as friends but wouldn't want to call one my brother.

CrackerBarrel 05-13-2008 09:52 AM

Quote:

Reason: TOS - language; "a gay"? really?
The title of the thread is "gays in fraternities." "A gay" is the singular of gays, is it not?

Also, what is the point in having this thread if everyone is just going to get all upset anytime someone posts something other than "Oh, it's wonderful to have gays in your fraternity. Great brotherhood. I wish my whole house was gay!" ????

nittanyalum 05-13-2008 09:59 AM

^^^LOL @ username CrackerBarrel. That's my Mom's favorite highway restaurant!

ladylike 05-13-2008 10:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel (Post 1650506)
The title of the thread is "gays in fraternities." "A gay" is the singular of gays, is it not?

Also, what is the point in having this thread if everyone is just going to get all upset anytime someone posts something other than "Oh, it's wonderful to have gays in your fraternity. Great brotherhood. I wish my whole house was gay!" ????

I am in love with your country ham and the cheesy hashbrowns. :)
::heart throb::
Quote:

Originally Posted by nittanyalum (Post 1650510)
^^^LOL @ username CrackerBarrel. That's my Mom's favorite highway restaurant!

I love it, too!
Yummmy, gravy-topped heart-attack inducing goodness. :o

Pledgetrainer 05-13-2008 11:01 AM

I don't think a single fraternity where I'm at would let in a gay. P.S. - if you have an opinion that someone somewhere might take offense with, they'll ban you for it in a heartbeat. banned Southernfratter and bowsandtoes just for this thread, and they weren't even being offensive...this website is a farce. And no, neither of those was me.

Senusret I 05-13-2008 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650528)
I don't think a single fraternity where I'm at would let in a gay. P.S. - if you have an opinion that someone somewhere might take offense with, they'll ban you for it in a heartbeat. banned Southernfratter and bowsandtoes just for this thread, and they weren't even being offensive...this website is a farce. And no, neither of those was me.

Awwww poor thing. Would you like us to call Al Sharpton for you? Stage a sit in against injustice?

Pledgetrainer 05-13-2008 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Senusret I (Post 1650541)
Awwww poor thing. Would you like us to call Al Sharpton for you? Stage a sit in against injustice?

Just commenting on the environment. This is how every big forum goes down...seen several like this.

LaneSig 05-13-2008 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650528)
P.S. - if you have an opinion that someone somewhere might take offense with, they'll ban you for it in a heartbeat. banned Southernfratter and bowsandtoes just for this thread, and they weren't even being offensive...this website is a farce. And no, neither of those was me.

If it's such a farce, then why come on here? Did we make you come here?

DSTCHAOS 05-13-2008 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650528)
I don't think a single fraternity where I'm at would let in a gay. P.S. - if you have an opinion that someone somewhere might take offense with, they'll ban you for it in a heartbeat. banned Southernfratter and bowsandtoes just for this thread, and they weren't even being offensive...this website is a farce. And no, neither of those was me.

Welp, some cleaning up happened last night. I doubt it was just for what they typed in this thread. We were just having a discussion.

GC is sometimes big on censorship but banning requires more than differing opinions. Unless you know for a fact that they were banned for no reason, have a seat.

Pledgetrainer 05-13-2008 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LaneSig (Post 1650556)
If it's such a farce, then why come on here? Did we make you come here?

I'm on here because one of them is my pledge brother and I figured I'd make a screen name and point it out while bored at work. He simply got a message that said he was banned, no reason given, and this was the only thread he'd really posted in. Other greek-related forums are considerably freer. This one might as well be controlled by the Chinese government, or possibly SigEp nationals. Ban me, delete my posts, whatever...trust me I'm not too invested in this.

DSTCHAOS 05-13-2008 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel (Post 1650506)
The title of the thread is "gays in fraternities." "A gay" is the singular of gays, is it not?

Also, what is the point in having this thread if everyone is just going to get all upset anytime someone posts something other than "Oh, it's wonderful to have gays in your fraternity. Great brotherhood. I wish my whole house was gay!" ????


This thread is for discussion. Discussion is what happened.

My opinion of homosexuality has positively evolved over the years. But I never said it was "wonderful" to have homosexuals in organizations because "wonderful" is an unnecessary value judgment. I just think that those who are dead set on prohibiting homosexuals need to stop pretending that it is "tradition" or "private organization rights to exclude" rather than prejudice. They also need to be realistic about their assumptions of homosexuality and brotherhood. They may be surprised on what they'd find if they weren't so clueless.

DSTCHAOS 05-13-2008 12:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650567)
I'm on here because one of them is my pledge brother and I figured I'd make a screen name and point it out while bored at work. He simply got a message that said he was banned, no reason given, and this was the only thread he'd really posted in. Other greek-related forums are considerably freer. This one might as well be controlled by the Chinese government, or possibly SigEp nationals. Ban me, delete my posts, whatever...trust me I'm not too invested in this.

Well, keep fighting the good fight.

knight_shadow 05-13-2008 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650567)
I'm on here because one of them is my pledge brother and I figured I'd make a screen name and point it out while bored at work. He simply got a message that said he was banned, no reason given, and this was the only thread he'd really posted in. Other greek-related forums are considerably freer. This one might as well be controlled by the Chinese government, or possibly SigEp nationals. Ban me, delete my posts, whatever...trust me I'm not too invested in this.

Yet you're still posting...

Pledgetrainer 05-13-2008 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow (Post 1650572)
Yet you're still posting...

As I said, bored at work, might as well sit back and watch the show..hope one of you obliges. Think I'll go check out my fraternity's forum and see how gay we are nationally.

DSTCHAOS 05-13-2008 12:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650574)
As I said, bored at work, might as well sit back and watch the show..hope one of you obliges. Think I'll go check out my fraternity's forum and see how gay we are nationally.

We're all here for something. Stop announcing why you're here. Checking your fraternity's forum to see "how gay you are nationally" is gay. Enjoy.

CrackerBarrel 05-13-2008 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS (Post 1650568)
This thread is for discussion. Discussion is what happened.

My opinion of homosexuality has positively evolved over the years. But I never said it was "wonderful" to have homosexuals in organizations because "wonderful" is an unnecessary value judgment. I just think that those who are dead set on prohibiting homosexuals need to stop pretending that it is "tradition" or "private organization rights to exclude" rather than prejudice. They also need to be realistic about their assumptions of homosexuality and brotherhood. They may be surprised on what they'd find if they weren't so clueless.

It's not discussion if taking one side of the argument gets someone banned. Honestly, that was my question. If you are only allowed to be on one side of this argument, they might as well delete this thread, because that's not a discussion at all. That's one group of people saying "Yay gays!" and another saying that they don't want gays in their house, being called monsters and then getting banned.

DSTCHAOS 05-13-2008 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel (Post 1650584)
It's not discussion if taking one side of the argument gets someone banned.

You obviously haven't read this board if you think expressing a dissenting opinion is the reason for being banned.

CrackerBarrel 05-13-2008 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS (Post 1650586)
You obviously haven't read this board if you think expressing a dissenting opinion is the reason for being banned.

Care to tell me what got those two banned if it wasn't the fact that they defended why houses shouldn't have to let gays in?

LaneSig 05-13-2008 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pledgetrainer (Post 1650567)
I'm on here because one of them is my pledge brother and I figured I'd make a screen name and point it out while bored at work. He simply got a message that said he was banned, no reason given, and this was the only thread he'd really posted in. Other greek-related forums are considerably freer. This one might as well be controlled by the Chinese government, or possibly SigEp nationals. Ban me, delete my posts, whatever...trust me I'm not too invested in this.

"This was the only thread he'd really posted in". Then neither could be your pledge brother, because both had made a lot of posts in this discussion and other threads.

DSTCHAOS 05-13-2008 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel (Post 1650587)
Care to tell me what got those two banned if it wasn't the fact that they defended why houses shouldn't have to let gays in?

Have you seriously read this thread? Has every poster who expressed a dissenting opinion in this thread been banned or their posts deleted? Think about it.

PrettyOnMyRight 05-13-2008 12:25 PM

One of my LB's is gay and it doesn't make me love him any less. Granted, he didn't come out until after we graduated GRAD SCHOOL, that does not undermine the fact that we went through the same things and we crossed those Sands TOGETHER. So be he gay or straight, he is the same man that I pledged with some twenty odd years ago. And I can live with that. But on to the point of the MB, as I have come to understand it, he is one of the more active members in his current alumni chapter so, no, gay people should not be banned from being members of our organizations. My organization, for instance, was founded upon the principle of achievement in every field of human endeavor. And personally, that man has achieved more than some of the straight frats.

AEPi BP 05-13-2008 12:25 PM

After reading 4 pages of this, I couldn't read everything before I posted (I do have finals I need to study for) but I figured I should represent what appears to be a minority, and that is a member of a chapter that welcomes gays. At first I thought it was because our campus is gay-friendly, but of the 10 houses on campus, we have gays, one house is VERY gay friendly (and in fact one of their gay members was just elected Greek Council president for the next year), and maybe one other has an openly gay member or two but other than that I would venture the rest have never even had an openly gay member. Our chapter adviser for the last 3 years is an openly gay alumnus. We live in a house, but it has never been an issue. We've had our gay brothers bring guys as their dates to formal, one of them has boyfriend he's been dating pretty much all year, and I always see him around the house and he's good friends with a lot of brothers. We've had at least one openly gay president, and many e-board positions have been filled by our gay brothers, including rush chair.

It's weird to me that someone could immediately say that because someone is gay their interests and ideologies automatically won't match up. As people have alluded to, there are lot of sexual fetishes out there, and I would venture that most people don't let what they do in the bedroom affect them too much. If you say that since gays have to live with ridicule, that it makes them different people, well then maybe if we don't ridicule them, they won't be so psychologically traumatized by the fact that they are gay.

CrackerBarrel 05-13-2008 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LaneSig (Post 1650588)
"This was the only thread he'd really posted in". Then neither could be your pledge brother, because both had made a lot of posts in this discussion and other threads.

Bowsandtoes1000 joined last night.

Pledgetrainer 05-13-2008 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel (Post 1650584)
It's not discussion if taking one side of the argument gets someone banned. Honestly, that was my question. If you are only allowed to be on one side of this argument, they might as well delete this thread, because that's not a discussion at all. That's one group of people saying "Yay gays!" and another saying that they don't want gays in their house, being called monsters and then getting banned.

Exactly. Exalt. I'd have to work a lot harder to get on people's nerves over at another greek forum I know well...I don't want to turn this into a "people today are too damn sensitive and PC" discussion but it's tempting.

Pledgetrainer 05-13-2008 12:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrackerBarrel (Post 1650596)
Bowsandtoes1000 joined last night.

Yep that was him.


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