Granted and the Sox go another 80 years w/o a World Series run

I wish the next person wishing below me would turn into a rabbit

granted, but everytime he plays, he wears a yankees undershirt... which gets picked up by the tabloids and all his fans turn on him.

I wish cold cuts weren't so expensive.

Granted but now anything to drink costs 2x as much as before.

I wish tomorrow was yesterday

granted, but seeing as how tomorrow's yesterday would be today... you're now Bill Murray and everyday is today.

i wish i hand an American Express card that I could spend on "business" expenses like all my clients.

Granted, but your company gets audited and now you're out of a job.



I wish that the twins I babysit for would get a visit from Supernanny...

Granted but she thinks that you are the parent and yells at you every chance she gets.

I wish I didn't have so many expenses popping up all at once.

Granted but now you have one lump sum due at the end of every month.



I wish My room would magically clean itself every day.

granted but then the rest of your house is aboslutely filthy

I wish Nicole Ritchie would gain 50 pounds and fill out

granted, but it's all from pork rinds

I wish the thing on the bottom of my chair hadn't broken.

Granted But now your desk is broken.

I wish I didn't have to work today.

Granted, you don't have to work today, or tomorrow, or the next, or ever really. And, you go into horrible debt, lose your house, and end up living in a cardboard box on the street corner. Darn.

I wish my roommate would give up on this damn guy and find someone else.

wish granted, but she steals your secret crush from freshman year

i wish i had some more carrots

granted but then u turn into bugs bunny

I wish global warming was fixed

granted - but now we're going to experience global freezing. how you like that?

I wish i found a decent job like right now!

Granted.....and you have to move to Wyoming... HA!! TAKE THAT!!!



I wish her job paid 5x as much as it does now.

Granted but now her bills are 10x what they used to be


I wish my paper for summer school history would get an A.



*** as a side note, my wish really did come true, the woman I babysit for cancelled on me so no work today =)

Granted, but then you get caught in a huge plagerism scandal that gets you expelled from the university. You then spend your life on the talk show circuit talking about plagerism. And write a book. That you copied. :D

I wish our pools (in my community) were fixed. :o

Granted, but now they have round the clock geriatric water aerobics classes.

I wish I had some marble slab vanilla bean ice cream right now!

granted but it taste like dog sh!t and thats all you have to eat for the rest of the week....


I wish I had a genie to grant me unlimited wishes....

Granted, but that damn genie keeps mixing your wishes up with someone's cat's... (how's all that catnip treating you?)


I wish I could figure out why I can't run the microwave and the A/C at the same time even though they're on different circuits...

Granted, but it turns out that it's because your house's entire electricity system is outdated. Now, you have to spend thousands getting your house re-wired.


I wish I could eat all the junk food I want and not have to worry about calories.

granted, but now you have to worry about diabetes, heart disease, and diarrhea.

i wish i could touch the sky - seriously. i wanna know what a cloud feels like.

granted and u get hit by a bolt of lightning....


I wish the weather stays nice like this all thru the weekend

Granted. But due to a case of mistaken identity, you're put on house arrest. You have to stay indoors all weekend and just watch everyone outside enjoying the weather.


I wish I had a new job lined up already.

granted, but then your old job offers you a 40% pay raise and 2 weeks more vacation. now what?

i wish i didn't make an azz of myself and fall asleep in our staff meeting today.

Granted. However, instead of making an azz of yourself by falling asleep, you make an azz out of yourself by showing up to the meeting sloshed. You then proceed to get up on the conferance table and dance suggestively. Someone at the meeting caught all of it on his cellphone. Now your drunken table dancing is all over YouTube. Now everywhere you go, creepy middle-aged men ogle you and hit on you. Your entire family has seen the YouTube video, which makes for some awkward family get-togethers.


I wish I wasn't so bored.

Wish granted. Only your not bored because your boss fired you and you are now very busy cleaning out your desk.

I wish I didn't have to take my CR-V to the shop today. :o

granted because it was stolen and burned in an alleyway....

i wish I had new bedroom furniture....

Granted! You won a free bedroom set. Only it's from Rooms 2 Go, and falls apart the first time you have... ahem... a good time. :D

I wish that I could go to sleep earlier!

granted and thus u wind up sleeping for 12 hrs and u piss in bed.


I wish circuit city would have a fire sale

Grated, but since you were the one who started the fire,all you get are three hots and a cot.

I wish I could go on a long vacation to the Bahamas.

LOL.....dayum you!!!!


Granted and it rains the entire time that you are there .....except the last day


I wish weekends could be longer

Granted, but you have to take another job to make up for the lost pay.



I wish (hope!) I could afford to go to the next ADPi Convention.

Too bad. ADPi wants to build a larger Executive office building. They are going to raise the money by raising the price of attenting Convention $5,000. ;)

I wish to move away from Jacksonville....(and one day, I intend to)

You move away from Jacksonville, to another beautiful sunny Florida location, only to have it hit by a hurricane that destroys your home and your car. Your insurance only covers 1/10 of the damage, because "they can't afford to pay you," and with only the clothes on your back you return to Jacksonville...

I wish my craft closet were bigger and I had less projects I want to do.

OK your craft closet is bigger, but now your clothes closet is smaller... where are you gonna fit all your clothes now?


I wish we had 37-hour days. Imagine all the stuff i could get done!

granted and you have to work 24 of each day and drive thru at least 3 hrs of traffic and by the time u get home all you can think of is sleep.


I wish Steadman would put his foot down and make Oprah marry him

Granted, but then she gets mad at him and has an affair with Gail, and leaves Stedman at the alter, taking the dogs with her.

I wish that I was at Typhoon Lagoon right now. :o :o :o

You take a few days off from work and drive to Orlando only to find that Typhoon Lagoon closed down.

I wish that someone would come to my house and wash my car every week.

Granted but when they wash your car, they get the oh-so-bright idea of using S.O.S. pads and make huge gashes in your paint! (On a side note that actually happened to my parents, on both of their cars which were less than a year old! DOH!)

I wish I could learn not to play on GC so much so I could actually do the work I need to do. :D My closets aren't cleaning themselves... but that's another wish! *lol*