Granted. You now have chronic wasting disease.

I wish I had shorter commutes to work and school.

Granted, but it's thru one of the worst neighborhoods in your city and on top of that you get robbed at gunpoint by a 10 year old on your first day going thru...not to mention later on, you find that your books are being auctioned off on ebay and craigslist.


I wish the next person corrupting this wish can come up with something funny.

granted but it's so funny that you have trouble breathing and then you suffocate

I wish I could know what people were thinking

Granted, but now you hear everyone thinking to themselves that your nose is too small and your hair is too long...

I wish I could focus today.

Granted, but all you can focus on is your hangnail so your boss fires you.

I wish my techs could figure out how to work the CT scanner.

Granted but then you wind up getting massive amounts of gamma radiation causing you to turn into the Hulk.


I wish one of you would treat the other to breakfast today.

granted but they conviently left their wallet home. so they have to borrow the money from you, and they still owe you a hundred dollars from last year.


I wish my back wasn't hurting

Granted but you slipped and fell in a sleet storm and now your back is hurting.

I wish someone would post a live recruitment thread and not be outed on her campus.

Granted, but she's a snooty biotch who gets dropped from every house after round 1.

I wish my dog didn't snore so loudly! (Ok, it's very cute but it keeps me awake!)

Granted but he wakes you up by howling all night, because he's having bad dreams.

I wish I had more motivation today.

^^^^ Granted, but you are only motivated to sit around on your ass.

I wish I didn't have to write all the Gustav/Hanna/Ike/Josephine stories and could instead read Greek Chat all day at work today.

Granted, but you don't get paid for it and around 2pm your internet connection goes out and nothing is on TV


I wish catiebug would grow taller.

Granted, but since every action has an equal and opposite reaction, you shrink until you are virtually gone (unless you look under a microscope!)

I wish my family members' electricity would come back on so they don't have to sit in post-hurricane heat in Baton Rouge!

Granted, but they still have the embarrassment of living in Louisiana.

I wish I had a bourbon and coke in class right now.