i've heard my share of pick up lines...

- let me have your number so i can go study. when i told this guy he didn't need my number for that, he couldn't think of anything else to say because he wasn't expecting that

-once, a guy told me that he wanted enough sons to start a football team and if i was lucky, he'd let me donate a couple http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif

-i have a real little samsung cellie and this guy asked to see it. a lot of people do so i let him. he proceeds to call his own cell phone (which was on vibrate) and gives me my phone back and told me to call him because he put his number in my phone and my phone in his. everytime he called, i was always "studying"

-you know how those credit card people hang around campus? well, one came to me and asked if he could go with me back to my dormroom because i "look like a freak" http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

-a guy asked if he could put the stuffing in my egg mcmuffin. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

-and, i have even had a guy come up to me, look at my breast and just yell "wwwoooaaahhh!!!"

------------------
I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind

[This message has been edited by MeezDiscreet (edited March 30, 2001).]

My little brother sent me this earlier this week

MALE COMEBACKS TO FEMALE COMEBACKS
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
>>> > > Woman: Yes that's why I don't go there anymore.
>>> > > Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there thinks
>>>you're a fat
>>> >slut.
>>> > >
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Is this seat empty?
>>> > > Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
>>> > > Man: Probably because you'd be on your knees sucking my cock
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Your place or mine?
>>> > > Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
>>> > > Man: That's cool, cause after I get done smackin' it to you
>>> > > in the back of my car...... I don't give a shit where
>>>you go.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: So, what do you do for a living?
>>> > > Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
>>> > > Man: So that's how you got that little mustache.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
>>> > > Woman: Do not enter.
>>> > > Man: Sure that isn't "yield to merging traffic"?
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>>> > > Woman: Unfertilized.
>>> > > Man: No problem, I can always shoot my load on your back.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
>>> > > Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
>>> > > Man: That works for me....... As long as you're still warm
>>> > > when I shove it up your ass.
>>> > >
>>> > > Male: Do you want to dance?
>>> > > Female: No!
>>> > > Male: I think you misheard me. I said
>>> > > your ass looks fat in those pants.
>>> > >
>>>
>>
>


Guys, I'm sorry. I know this was distasteful and unbecoming of a southern gentleman but I thought you'd get a kick out of it. Dont hold it against me.

[This message has been edited by KABillyMac (edited March 30, 2001).]

http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

some of those were really good.

Guys I want to apoligize for posting that I really should have cleaned it up a little before I posted it so I'm real sorry I thought for sure you guys who be lookin to have me hanged for posting it, but when Gphi reposted it there was nothing I could do

don't be sorry
It was right on. Some are really good, like I said before. I mean, i try to be a gentlemen too, but girls usully give the cold shoulder to the ones of us who they call sweetie.

Amen to that.

bump.
and ill add one. sorry for the bad taste. your parents must have been retarded, because you sure are special.

Hey baby, I actually benefited from the Bush's tax cut.

We sat in one of the girl's rooms last night in the Chi O house looking up funny pick up lines and this is our favorite:

"Hey, do you have any raisins?"
"No"
"Well, how about a date?"

We decided any guy who was cute enough to come up with this, we would give them a chance.

The second worst pickup line actually used on me:

"I haven't had sex for a year and I'M ABOUT DUE!"

(The worst is not appropriate to type here. Suffice it to say, the guy got slapped! :D )

I somehow attract guys with the weirdest pick up lines ever. I don't think that they're true pick up lines, but seriously, why can't guys just introduce yourself.
Some random guy came up to me at the bar and said, "My uncle is Chuck Wollery..." I think I said that's nice or something like that and left, but I really wanted to ask if women were actually impressed by that?
Then I had the guy who was talking to me about what a great hunter he was (how we got on this topic I do not know) when he started doing turkey calls and claimed he was a better turkey caller than anyone else in the bar or the state for that matter (I didn't dispute him, just thought it was a bit strange). I wasn't too suprised when he got kicked out of the bar later on that night for being too drunk.

One time I was at a party and I saw this amazingly gorgeous female. Being very nonchalant I went up to her, stopped...made eye contact with her. looked at her butt. then looked at my butt. then said to her, " My ass is better than yours". and walked away.

later she went up to me with two drinks in her hand (one was for me) and said, " So your ass is better than mine huh? I think I have a better chest though."

I was at Disco midnight bowling a couple of weeks ago visiting some friends about 2 hours away and as my friends and I were leaving two of us stopped to let some others catch up... ne way so I'm standing there and this guy comes up to me and goes "BAM !!" and shoves a club/party flier in my face (think that sketch on In Living Color with the business card remember that ?) NE WAY.. so I'm there with this flier with scantily clad women on it right in my face with this not too attractive guy with alcohol on his breath totally invading my personal space...
ME -"can I help you?"
Him - come to the club with me.
ME- I don't live around here
him-where do you live ? I want to move there
me- laughing...
Him- you have a BF ?
Me- yes... (lying to get him out of my face)
him- he wouldnt' let you go to the club ?
me- Probably not...
Him- well can I get your number we could be just friends...
Me- I don't think so..
Him- he does't let you have friends ?
me- not ones I meet at the bowling alley at 2 am...

finally my friends catch up and drag me off and tell prince charming that we really have to go...

MORAL: if someone tells you they are involved... they are saying it for a reason...

Creepy guys like that don't care. They just keep hounding you until their sane friend tells them to stop or you can get into a cab, and even then they may try and get in with you.

Hi, can you buy me a beer?

ok....so here are two lines that have been used on me.....both worked and the latter came from my current b/f for almost 3 yrs


Scenario: I am at a date party with a boy that I had a crush on. we were both under 21 at the time, and the security at the location was really tight, no DEF no drinking underage

Me: I'm sorry that they're being jerks about carding
Him: Well, that's ok. I have a beautiful girl standing in front of me and that's all the intoxication I need


Scenario: I am at one of the local bars. It happened to be my current b/f's 21st. I was feeling a little tipsy and in need of a cigarette. I decided to ask him for one because I always found him very attractive and very sweet

Me: Hey, do you think I could bum a cigarette?
Him: What are you gonna give me for it?
Me: Depends on what you have in mind
Him: Why don't you give me a kiss

like i said, the last worked and we've been together for almost 3 yrs.

About 10 minutes ago:

Him: What's up?
Me: Not much, what are you up to? :confused:
Him: Not much, bored and looking for trouble. ;)
Me: Uh oh! :rolleyes:
Him: Are you trouble?? ;) :cool:


Ummm..... :confused:

OMG! That is funny!

ONe time I was at a terrible bar in Nashville and this guy comes up to me & is like "So.....Have you ever made out with a local?"


Was that supposed to work? I mean seriously.

Today a resident (who I'm assuming worked in the cancer unit) at the hospital said "You're really cute, too bad you don't have cancer."

I was like :eek: :mad: and he was like "Uhh umm I didnt mean it like that..."

Whatev