I didn't mean to imply that the current members "can't" change. I said that OP is "unlikely to be able to change the personalities of the majority of the existing members into what she is looking for." The current members are under NO obligation to change for OP and may very well prefer things just the way they are. They were there first, after all. OP knew full well what kind of group she was joining; she just didn't know that she couldn't so easily un-join if she changed her mind. So, while she may not change the current members into the types of personalities with whom she wants to associate, she can make an effort to recruit new members more to her liking. The current members may approve, or they may not. Wish we had a happy, easy answer for her and every unhappy poster, but such is life.

Wishy-washy doesn't cut it in the real world. YOU make the decision. YOU are the 'frustrated' one. YOU hold the coin you want to flip.

BTW, are you SURE you aren't in the right sorority? Even though you say this group is the one you 'really didn't like', you sound as apathetic as you say your sisters are.

Your 'loving the idea of sorority' does not translate into being willing to work for their betterment and your own.

They're not judging you because you're in "that" sorority. They're judging you because you show by your voice, body language and general demeanor that you're ashamed to be in "that" sorority. People don't like people who aren't comfortable with their selves and their lives. It makes THEM think about the worst parts of themselves. If anyone actually says "Gamma Gamma Gamma?!??" (GGG in place of your sorority's real name) then you reply "Yeah, Gamma Gamma Gamma. Do you got a problem with that?" Be proud. Get in people's faces. Be so obnoxiously 110% GGG that people want to smack you over the head. Maybe eventually you'll believe it yourself.

I just gotta say this: if your campus is one where Ren Faire is an acceptable fraternity/sorority activity, you are WAY blowing your sorority's awkwardness out of proportion. It may be the Greek system IN GENERAL is not what you thought it would be, but if you want to stay at this school, it is what it is. Go out with the girls in your chapter who like to go out. Be sociable. And most of all, let everyone know that you're a Gamma Gamma Gamma. IT WILL BE NOTICED, and that will have an effect on how fraternity members and rushees think about your chapter.

This all said, if dance team is going to continue to play a major role in your life to the point that the majority of your free time and weekends will be spent with it, you may be better off dropping out of the sorority. (Hint: if this is a college team and many dance competitions fall at the same time as big Greek-wide events, it may be a subtle way of telling the team members that they need to pick one or the other. This happens with other extracurriculars, i.e. band camp happening the same time as rush week.)

Simply put, be the change you want to see in your chapter.

The last time I said that, people laughed at me.

http://www.onesadpanda.com/wp-conten...a_painting.jpg

:(

This! .. x 1000.

This pretty much made my day. LOL

Or if she thinks this is an acceptable sorority activity, she is blowing her inability to fit in with the awkward chapter out of proportion.

Are you perping AOII?

We're never sad pandas.;)

well...that Lilly print kinda has :eek:scary panda:eek: if you ask me. Had dinner tonight with a Chi O, Sigma Kappa, Tri Delta, Pi Phi, and another Theta. We analyzed all the Lilly prints and decided that :eek:scary panda:eek: just doesn't quite work with the roses. Someone at the table made a crack about Joe Arpaio. Then the PiPhi got all perplexed at the squiggly arrows, and the SK had a few funny things to say about her print. The only one who's happy is the TriDelta. We all agreed on the suitability of the Theta print for rock fighting.

Oh, I'm off topic again. Sorry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature...v=CsyR6s6uo40#!

Rock fighting, huh? I'm gonna have to hear this story! Scary panda, indeed! Damn you Lily Pulitzer!!!!!:mad:

Alumnae years can be better
 

I had a wonderful experience in my collegiate chapter until we were closed and then I had a wonderful time with my sisters until I finished school. I got married, had kids, and took about 10 years off from everything but our International Reunion Day. I lived all over the country during those 10 years as my husband was in the Air Force. I missed Alpha Gamma Delta. I volunteered at the International Level, we never lived close to a chapter and I still made everlasting friendships. My 4 girls went to college, pledged Alpha Gam, and it could sometimes be hard for the collegians to discern the difference between a mom who happens to be an Alpha Gam and an International Visitor. I took another break. Now, I'm at the point where I'm volunteering again, this time at a local chapter. My main point is that while I loved my collegiate years, my alumnae years have been fruitful and in some ways better.

LOL I almost died when I saw this.

Best part of this thread...I actually laughed out loud.

Speaking of people feeling for their sorority, when Lilly re-spells AOIIs phrase on the fabric, will they also take out the scary panda because its not an official mascot (just going by what I hear)?

Just wanted to say: "Welcome Sister"!

Make sure you introduce yourself in the Alpha Gam Forum!

Don't I wish! And make the wheat golden instead of bizarro burgandy, and make the background any color but pink and get rid of the life-saver looking rubies and replace with something that looks like a ruby...:rolleyes: I could go on and on and on. Will someone tell me why I voted for this damn thing?

So here's another angle I wonder if you thought about. You are a dancer for what sounds like a university team. Have you ever invited your sisters to see a performance? Have you introduced them to who you are and what you love? Sorority women appreciate hard work and dancing at that level tends to take dedication and talent. I'd bet your sisters would like to watch you dance and be proud to know that this talented dancer is their sister. Your dedication to dancing is the same dedication that those girls have to their letters.

In the end it's a 2-way street. If you put the effort in, you will reap the rewards. They may not be instant, but nothing good in life happens instantly. My advice is to try. Try to reach out. Try to meet a sister every 2 days and learn something new about them. Try to show them who you are.

Also, own your letters. Your org is a LOT bigger than your campus. Research your org. The national site, the facebook pages. Find out what your org stand for, ask to see your ceremony book and read the initiation ceremony and decide what it means to you. Whatever you do, don't be rash. Educate yourself (meeting sisters, really learning about your org) and then make a decision about your membership. What you find might surprise you.

I was just reading this thread and, even though I haven't made it through all of the post, I had to jump in. I am the COB chair for my sorority and one thing my MVP and I (as long as countless older sisters) tell the girls in our chapter to do is to recruit girls that are better than themselves. Someone saw something in you and realized that they could benefit from you joining the chapter in many ways. Maybe they thought you were funny, had potential as a leader and/or recruiter, or the positive attitude that the chapter needed to help it turn around. If I heard ANY of my sisters, new members or initiated, talk about my chapter like this I would be heart broken.

Like other have said, you have made a life long commitment. Either put the effort in and get to know (and love) your chapter, or drop so they don't spend energy on someone who isn't even fully commited to the chapter. They've already put in effort recruiting you, getting you through your new member period, (I'm assuming) giving you a Big; give them the same chance.

Hrm. Because we actually had faith that it would look nice.... o_O

And now we feel cheated. :( Maybe I am a sad panda.

I didn't see this post before, but YES!!! Do this! Most sororities have programming requirements that they need to meet as far as sister socializing events so not only would you be showing them part of what matters to you, you would be helping the VP who is in charge of this stuff out too. If all you ever say is "I can't go to the meeting/mixer/ritual because I have a dance performance" and never invite anyone to the performances, they're just going to get more and more upset that you are blowing sorority activities off.

We had a sister perform a major role in a campus musical. The entire chapter came out to support her for opening night. Not only did the chapter enjoy going and doing something a bit different from a normal sisterhood activity, but it meant the world to that sister that the entire chapter came out in support.

This is a great idea OP, look in to it!

I don't think I ever saw this one. Maybe it'll help someone!

I wish the OP came back later to update. Did she drop? Did she stay in and find ways to get involved? Or just become one of those members who does the bare minimum and never really gets to know people. Hmm....

yes

Not a chapter I worked directly with, but one somewhat nearby did this with the sophomores prior to recruitment. They drew the outline of a person on a piece of paper, and then brainstormed on all of the great qualities that their sisters had. Ince they had created the perfect woman, they then said that was the target that they were going for during Recruitment. They wanted women who were better than the ones they already had, and who had as many of the qualities that they could determine. This focus really caused the quality of women in that chapter to rise over time until they were a superstar, absolutely stellar chapter!