Jeff has alot more patience than me. If I did everything that he did and got "held over," I'd tell the fraternity to go screw.

And I thought an AM had the exact same rights and responsibilities that a brother had in a chapter? Having Jeff held over is like taking a history exam, getting an A+ on it, and then having the professor tell you that you have to take the class again next semester.

My remarks are not anti-HQ, all I tell is the truth.. I have the SAME exact say in any matter regarding LXA than ANYONE or any brother.

People need to wake up and realize that our frat is not perfect. For Christ's sake, OUR OWN FOUNDER GOT KICKED OUT of the fraternity he started!

While that may be your opinion, I suggest that you cool your jets.

If you want to call, You have My phone # or PM me.

This stops now or I will Lock it or delete it.

I will be at an Alum Function tonight, but the CP is on.

If you do not have it, PM Me and I will give it to you!

I agree Tom.

Jeff you seem like a good guy. If you were held over then there is a reason for it. I think Gamma is just doing what he usually does. Most of us are able to call other brothers by their first name, but we still as of yet do not know Gamma's. He came on this forum in a whirl wind of trouble and has had it follow him where ever he has posted.
You'll make the choice that is right for you, and it isn't our descision to make. Good Luck and I hope you stick it out.

I have not now nor ever thought our HQ is perfect. You can’t have sat through the alumni workshop that Tom Earp, Jono, JoinerLXA and I all did and think our HQ is perfect. Hell we were damn near bankrupt because of jackasses like Tom Helmbock and Bob London who almost ran the fraternity into the ground. There’s lots of thing that HQ has done in the past that bothers me. I’ll even list a few for you that PROVE that I am not ‘drinking the HQ kool-aid’. 1) I don’t like that money rules the day. Some chapters who’s alums donate a lot of money get treated differently that new or ‘less affluent’ chapters. 2) They have always been very disorganized and have taken forever to get back to you. Hell I can remember that when I was initiated, it took a year to get my membership certificate. That’s ridiculous. But one of the differences between you and I, is that instead of sitting back and bitching about things, I got involved in HQ business to see how I could help. I SAW that the staff up there was made up of good, hard working people who want to help the fraternity. They obviously do it for the love, cause the pay is for crap. HQ screws up. They are human. We all screw up. I am only speaking of the Fraternity here. I could care less what happened between you and LCAP. See, LCAP is a COMPLETELY different entity from the FRATERNITY. Yes, they are separate companies, with separate boards of directors. I don’t work with any chapters who deal with LCAP, so I don’t care what they do. Its not the Fraternity, its a separate company.

I served my ACTIVE, OPEN chapter (at three different universities) as Phi, Kappa, Delta and Beta, and now Pi. I also served as IFC VP of Recruitment and VP External. I have attended 3 Leadership Seminars, 3 General Assemblies, 6 Conclaves/RLS and am a graduate of LEAP 4, the precursor to IMPACT. I have performed 4 of the 5 positions in the AM ceremony and this Saturday, I’ll be seeing Ritual for the 34th time. Really, I write down each time I see it in the front of my paed.

I’m not worried about what was allegedly shown on national TV. As someone on here said, to the general public, they cant tell us apart from the other Greeks. LXA has a great rep. Campus’ want us to come there. We are one of a very few fraternities that get asked to come to campuses. you? You didn’t join because it sucked, did you? It might suck to be a Lambda Chi in the Northeast, but it sure as hell rocks down here in Texas. Maybe you just joined at the wrong school.



Kudos to your big brother for serving the country. I respect everyone who serves the country. I use the awards as a qualification of a successful chapter.

I have not now nor ever thought our HQ is perfect. You can’t have sat through the alumni workshop that Tom Earp, Jono, JoinerLXA and I all did and think our HQ is perfect. Hell we were damn near bankrupt because of jackasses like Tom Helmbock and Bob London who almost ran the fraternity into the ground. "There’s lots of thing that HQ has done in the past that bothers me. I’ll even list a few for you that PROVE that I am not ‘drinking the HQ kool-aid’. 1) I don’t like that money rules the day. Some chapters who’s alums donate a lot of money get treated differently that new or ‘less affluent’ chapters. 2) They have always been very disorganized and have taken forever to get back to you. Hell I can remember that when I was initiated, it took a year to get my membership certificate. That’s ridiculous. But one of the differences between you and I, is that instead of sitting back and bitching about things, I got involved in HQ business to see how I could help. I SAW that the staff up there was made up of good, hard working people who want to help the fraternity. They obviously do it for the love, cause the pay is for crap. HQ screws up. They are human. We all screw up. I am only speaking of the Fraternity here. I could care less what happened between you and LCAP. See, LCAP is a COMPLETELY different entity from the FRATERNITY. Yes, they are separate companies, with separate boards of directors. I don’t work with any chapters who deal with LCAP, so I don’t care what they do. Its not the Fraternity, its a separate company."

I respect your opinion and am glad that you agree with me. However, LCAP and HQ do go hand in hand. They try to appear separate but they are not. I've dealt with both simultaniously during the selling of our house and renting out our house. I think the frat would run much better if there was a true division between the two.

Being in a small chapter means alot more experience than normal. Yes, you have held many official positions. However, my experience, although I too have held many official positions, is more about the nitty gritty of chapter functions. Waking up at 4 am becaue the heater broke or the oil ran out. Dealing with nazi-like health and building inspectors just waiting to shut you down for any violation. Dealing with the town to help schedule the repayment of thousands of dollars of back taxes. Dealing with a stabbing that was non-fraternal related and random on the chapters front lawn. Dealing with non-brother tenants that violate rules or don't pay their rent. Dealing with contractors to bring the house up to code so we can get a occupation certificate. Those are just the normal circumstances I've dealt with. I can't even begin to tell you the absolutely, weird, unusual, difficult, stupid things that I've dealt with. Unlike many chapters, we never had the comfort of having a strong alumni base or alumni experience to guide us through. Our chapter existed on the hard work of a bunch of 19 and 20 year olds with no life experience. We learned as we went along because we had to, there was no one there telling us we were getting ripped off for the price of oil for our furnace. There was no one there telling us the contractor was taking advantage of us. There was no one there telling us our legal rights when it came to house inspection. It was actually pretty damn unfair to have house leadership and members deal with full time college, financial difficulties, normal frat problems, and a house (like other Umass frats) constantly being threatened for health violations. That's why I say I have more experience than most other people in actually "running" a chapter. Our chapter meetings didn't deal with frat problems, they dealt with where we were going to get the money for heat, or how to pay the water bill.

As far as the ritual, I know that damn thing inside out. I have most of it memorized. Go ahead, quiz me.

No I joined at the right school. My best friends were met there. But you are right, it does suck being in any frat up here. Frats in the northeast are not what they used to be, most are struggling to survive. That puts alot of added pressure on everyone.

Sorry for the red-neck comment, uncalled for.

1. Gamma Zeta, if my memory serves me right, was on the lower probation, if not off of it, when it closed. There was an incident several years before I joined in which the probation started. I do think that it was unfair how HQ treated the current brothers for the sins of those before them. No one from the original incident were even active but there was still probation. I can tell you, we worked our asses off to get off probation only to have HQ say not good enough. And that was dealing with all the other crap we had. We showed amazingly good faith towards HQ, only to have them ignore us. The semester before we closed, I believe we were even being considered for the Pheonix Award (I think thats what its called.)
2. I don't know. Hell I didn't even know that HQ had those ratings anymore. When the consultants came, we usually got good comments. Nothing major.
3. Academically we were diverse. We mostly were average to the rest of the frats. However, that was only because of one or two brothers that were slacking. So far, out of the last 25 brothers initiated, we have 5 in top ranked law schools, Cordozza and Columbia and another 4-6 pursuing their M.B.A's. We have several others that are working at some of the most respected financial institutions in Boston and several working for Fortune 50 companies. So to put it shortly, we were actually a pretty damn smart group.

1. None
2. None

I don't need people to have to thank me for my work, I just do what needs to be done.

Now here's two questions for you:

1. How many of your brothers ever thanked you for spending your own significant amount of money to buy building materials so the chapter wouldn't lose its residency permit?

2. How many of your brothers ever thanked you for risking your academic standing because the chapter needed you?

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Time to pull this thread
 

At this point, I think the moderators need to pull this thread. If the guys want to tussle, let them do it in private, this is not productive anymore.

LXAALUM/ Tom?

Lenoxxx

Hmmm... sounds shockingly familiar - almost anyone from a smaller chapter in the North East or Canada could say pretty much the same thing.... your experience is unfortunately in no way unique - anyone from a smaller chapter will recognize the issues brought up by fewer people to shoulder the load and responsibility - you just work through it though.



Again a common trait in the smaller chapters - again because less people are there to shoulder the responsibility and workload.



Yeah... the North East while the heart and soul of most GLOs in the early days are on "hard times" now... partly because of changing attitudes towards greeks, and partly because of the actions (or inactions) of greeks themselves... It'll take alot of work and effort to turn it around, or in some regain what has been lost.

I personally feel that those from this region have alot to contribute to the growth of the Fraternity - their mettle has been tested a little more frequently... and as such some great leaders can be produced - the problem is finding leaders that haven't become jaded or burnt-out by the pressure, but inpsired and hopeful for the future...

Again not unique... I can answer both of these in the affirmative and state that the numbers are both around a dozen actives and a dozen alumni...

Stop thinking that your experiences are unique as many, many other Brothers have experienced "hard-times" and difficulties as both active and alum while in the service of the Fraterinty.


PS> If you want to disparage the Fraternity or Brothers on thi board - please pursue it in a less public form, or temper your remarks so that they fall within the bounds of constructive debate...

No need to, we're just starting to get settled and have a civilized conversation. We got it out of our systems.

The northeast greek systems are in serious trouble. More so than the rest of the nation. Sure we may get a few upward bumps, but we are still headed downward. I don't think it is because of the actual greeks themselves, it has more to do with the outside influences, such as college/university administration and general population attitude than anything.

Plain and simple, non-greeks simply do not want frats and sororities anymore and are willing to do anything to get rid of them. Why? I don't know.

I can only speculate that the northeast is by virtue a more liberal place. Such greek organizations are not viewed as being accpeting and are now politically incorrect. Interesting, I wonder how the greek systems in the "blue" and "red" states compare. I wonder if there is some type of social aspect that is affecting our numbers.

As far as the ritual, it was not because I was in a smaller chapter. We were very dedicated to ritual and everyone always did their share, so no problems there. I did however take the time by myself to learn more and read up on it. My knowledge comes from my own undertaking and not because it was forced upon me. Now I am not a history buff like the others because I had no idea or time to collect the history, but as far as the actual ritual goes, I'm an expert.

I doubt it... for example in Canada the 'liberal' parties, the Liberals and the NDP, both have Fraternity men as leaders - whereas the 'conservative' parties do not... in fact that has nearly always been the case historically as well up here.

Hey guys, yeah.. so after a few days of thinking, I believe that I'll stay in the fraternity. It just sucks that now I feel majorly excluded from the group after the vote, but I'll persevere.

Jeff

Good for you Jeff. Use the time wisely - if you and your big have a good relationship, have him find out those that didn't "know you" and make it a point to get to know them (that means learn about them, their personalities, don't compromise your values. If they insist on you doing so, let exec know, and perhaps that is a good sign to leave, for THEY are compromising the ideals of LXA at that point).

If you and your big aren't very close, then go to a brother in the chapter you are close with and try the same thing.

I wish you the best - it's so worth it.

Hey Jeff, I'll give you a little advice about feeling excluded. You're not going to like or get along with everyone in the chapter, especially a big chapter. Remember to always respect them and try to get along though.

Try to find your niche. If recruitment is your thing, put alot of effort into rush. If ritual is your thing, do ritual. If fundraising is what you enjoy, do fundraising. Then, if you specialize, you'll meet and get to know alot of the other guys that enjoy and are working on the same thing.

You can't be everyone's best friend, that is not expected of you. But do your best to at least know something about everyone.

Remember, not everything about being a brother is actual LXA teachings and what not. My experience showed me that most frats really don't focus on the fraternity for much of the day while socializing. Try to not to get to know people because you want to get in or gain acceptance or because they are a brother, get to know people like you would anyone else. Go drinking with them one night, play some Xbox, get a study group, get a group of guys together to paint the porch, grab some guys to go to a ska concert.

I remember when I was a n.i.bshit, I kind of felt excluded. Everyone had their little groups that would go out, etc. I never was ever really invited to go with them. Then one day an older brother asked why I didn't go out as much. I told him they never invited me. He replied saying that they didn't have to, I was always automatically invited and always welcome. Bottom line, when you see a group doing something that you normally wouldn't, ask them if you can join in, they will say yes.

Jeff.

I think you made a very wise decision here.

I do have some insight and I am going to send you a phone number via PM. Call it. I will not say anymore than that as it was Your Thread and has taken a left turn.

For the rest of the crap that has been going on, PM or keep it Brotherly.

I just purviewed this whole thread today for the first time.
In my opinion, the crap talking should stop because you guys are both grown men and have very different opinions. Also, you don't know one another and are assuming way too many things about each other.

As for this thread, I think it is interesting and some people might want to read about Jeff's situation and they can learn about things other chapters do.

I have never heard about holding someone over and some of the terms you guys are using. I feel for Jeff because I have been in the same situation as him. My fresh year I never really hung around because I was focused on school and I was almost black balled because of it (I did not know this until my soph year). I was very popular but I partied too much in high school and made sure academics came first in college.
Luckily, I was not blackballed but I did not have the easiest associate experience because I did not get to know the brothers. My advice for you Jeff is you need to participate in more social activities and get to know the brothers better because it sounds like you are not doing that. This does not mean go drinking or getting crunk with them but this means doing social activities with them such as: playing sports, watching movies, going to a concert and so forth. Social life is very important with fraternities and it is what you will be spending the majority of your time doing with your fraternity brothers, your brothers should be able to see the social side of you.

At the same time, its great to really care about the fraternity and show an intense passion as an associate, I really admire that. You should definitely stick with it because you will gain leadership experience and learn about a great fraternity. Like I said, stick with it but do not be this chapters puppet, or have them keep screwing with you. I understand what GZ said because if my chapter did something like this, which we don't, that means they don't want you and you should get the hell out of there.

Also, Jeff you sound really indecisive and that could be a problem, you need to make a firm decision about your situation and stick with it. Obviously, it sounds like you want to stay and there is a chance all of this will work it, then so be it.

Overall, I definitely agree with some of the things GZ says, I have no clue about his chapters history or anything like that but he basically says what many people are afraid to say. This board is sometimes to optimistic and does not live in reality.
At the same time, I really like what the brother from Texas says, Lenoxxx. Sorry if I get your name wrong, but he knows his shit and should be respected because he has been in the fraternity much longer. Maybe other brothers can learn about different sides and perspectives related to Jeff's situation and form their own opinion about it. This board should be open to all members to say what they want but nobody should be insulted, lets save all the insults for a discussion about FIJI.