Oh I know...but it's the implication that if they don't send it then they're not getting a RIF from that person and that gets sticky.

And now that communicating via e-mail is easy and cheap, there's no excuse for not sending a quick message to say, "We got your rec on _________. Thank you for sending it."


You are so right! I think I've gotten 1 a young lady - "thanks for your recommendation for Delta Gamma. I wanted to let you know that I joined Alpha Beta Gamma at Big State University, but I really appreciate your help." That was really nice.

Same thing - easy for them to acknowledge.

I think I've gotten the gamut for both PNMs and chapters. From PNM - no thank you, thank you note included with her packet, and the thank you after Bid Day with info on where she pledged.
For chapters, - no acknowledgement at all(did they even get it?), acknowledgements l-o-n-g after Bid Day (where did they pledge???), postcards received promptly and well before Bid Day, postcards with "thanks she didn't pledge DG," up to a booklet of all the new members with facts about each one, and nicest of all, a thank-you note from a new member who didn't even give me her info - I got a request for a rec from the chapter.

For the chapters - if you have conscientious advisers and good training from previous officers, you probably will tend to those details. But that particular officer is often one that had to be talked into taking the job and is annoyed by all the paperwork and detail.

Oh, yes, those responses from PNMs and the chapters do run the gamut. The best chapter response that I have received came from our Alpha chapter. Not only was the note handwritten to let me know that she had, indeed, pledged that chapter (yay!) but it was also a personal invitation to attend her initiation! That was a definite first!

Unfortunately this was a PNM that I did not know well at the time but we had multiple, multiple mutual contacts who all raved about her and so I was more than happy to write her rec. Oh how I would have loved to attend an initiation at Alpha chapter. By her senior year I did know her quite well and I so regret that I was never able to go visit her campus/chapter for a personal tour while she was there.

On the other end of the spectrum is one chapter that sends me a pre-printed card, with blank line for PNM's name, each November-December. This is to thank me for my rec which was mailed in June for a mid-August Recruitment. The pre-printed text indicates that the chapter will "give that PNM all consideration," blah, blah, all in future tense. The best part is that the text at the bottom indicates that I should contact my area's Reference Board Chair following recruitment for a list of girls and where they pledged if I am wondering about this specific PNM. Ahem, I AM the area's Reference Board Chair and I have not once *ever* received any sort of list from this chapter!!

(That's my job, too)
Oh, that's RICH! :eek: :rolleyes:
Have you ever thrown that back to them? If so, did they respond?

Hah! And one more duty for you.

I prefer the more subtle approach - I advised my daughter to send out thank you notes to her rec writers about two weeks before recruitment began, so in case they'd forgotten about it they still had time to send it in.
For my submitted recs, I've received an acknowledgement postcard from the chapter for every rec I wrote within a week after rush, with the exception of the one I wrote for my own in-house legacy daughter, who pledged elsewhere.

I don't think the postcard is over-the-top IF you make sure you snail mail your rec writer a thank you note immediately. I understand that young women want reassurance, but like a job recommendation, I am not going to give them just because you ask.

I explain gently when I'm asked for a rec that I typically spend 1-2 hours per recs I write between research, typing and editing. If I don't receive a thank you note, I might subtly add a line in the form that she approached me after receiving my name from an alumnae board, I only have a casual connection with this young woman, and after several weeks I haven't received an acknowledgement or thanks for agreeing to write this informational recommendation. At this time you should consider this to be for your information only, and not necessarily an endorsement. And then I leave the "recommend" box blank, and tell the chapter they can check it if they like her enough to invite her back for pref.

I have gone as far to say that a young woman may appear impressive on paper, but her lack of follow-up leaves me to believe that others may be a better fit for the chapter. I don't do this out of spite, but I would rather the chapter know that if a woman can't be bothered to even say as much as thank you over e-mail (the way she originally contacted me), she might not be committed for the long haul despite all the things she says.

My chapter sends a card that says, "thank you for writing a rec for _________. She accepted a bid from ________" , which is great, as I can see where they went.

No excuse for not writing thank you notes for rec writers on the part of PNMs. I solicited recs for my god daughter in an out of state competitive recruitment and heck, I thanked them too!

Katmandu - the UCLA Chi O chapter does the same thing your chapter does to thank alumnae for writing Recs. Last year, we had a whopping total of three dozen recs for over 1000 women going through recruitment. It was a record for us! (I can hear all the gasps from advisers at other large schools in my head as I post this.) When a rec comes in the war room, our affectionate term for the work room during recruitment, we're like "Woo hoo! We got a rec!"

WOW! We were told by one of our officers that we received over 1,000 recs, legacy forms and other letters of support for just over 1,000 PNMs...and yes, that does mean that for every girl who didn't have anything another girl could have had three or four forms. What a difference campus and regional culture makes.