Coming out Greek

[LadyLight]

Ok, I'm talking about letting ppl know you're Greek (not gay or Greek and gay). I've only told a few ppl I've become Greek and I know my mom and friends back home are totally unsupportive of the Greek system.
Does anybody have stories about how they told parents or unsupportive friends they went Greek? What's the best way to do I do it?

[SAEalumnus]

My parents were never anti-Greek, but weren't exactly thoroughly supportive of the idea at first either. I let them read through our pledge manual (it's a public book anyway) to satisfy themselves of what the organization was about and that seemed to work. Later as I held various offices and attended various leadership schools, they began to see the additional value besides just the social aspect.

[REE1993]

When I was an undergrad, my family never paid much attention to it, except when I was overloading on activities and commitments and I wasn't feeling well (I have Cystic Fibrosis).

Ten+ years later, being active in my alum chapter (I moved back to my home state last summer), my older sister and mom think that the work I do and connections I have are great. They thought it was cool that I was in our quarterly newsletter.

Gamma Sig is an important part of my life, but it never defined me. So it was never an issue to my family. In fact, outside of my mom and blood sisters, it doesn't register on anyone's radar, and I wear para every so often.

This makes me think of when I told my dad I was joining a sorority. The coversation went something like this:
"So, are you going to live there?"
"Where, Dad?"
"At the sorority."
"Dad, a sorority isn't a place!"

[SmartBlondeGPhB]

I don't even remember how I first told my parents, I'm guessing my dad was there when I signed up since he flew to St Louis to move me in. But then, my parents have always been teh type to just let me do whatever.

And considering I have pictures of myself in letters at various conventions, my affiliation is definitely not a secret and definitely not something I need to "tell" people. That and my favorite football team are pretty obvious.

[fantASTic]

My older sister [biological] is Greek as well at a different school, so my parents weren't at all upset about it. Then again, they let us make our own choices for the most part. One thing that we do that helps parents understand the system more, though, is Man's Weekend in the fall and Women's Weekend in the winter. You invite one or two people to it [men to man's weekend, women to Women's] and we do activities or volunteer or something and then we do a ritual that they participate in, so that they can see what it's REALLY about. THe ritual is made specially to explain the sorority to them. It works really well.

[DSTCHAOS]

I only know one person who struggled to "come out" as a member of a GLO. This person's parents were opposed to Greekdom for religious reasons.

Other than that, the people I know don't require a "coming out" other than the coming out ceremonies that many organizations hold.

[1908Revelations]

Originally Posted by jessicaelaine

This makes me think of when I told my dad I was joining a sorority. The coversation went something like this:
"So, are you going to live there?"
"Where, Dad?"
"At the sorority."
"Dad, a sorority isn't a place!"

That is sooo cute!

[SxyLambdaLady6]

My mom wasn't too excited about it but she supports everything that I want to put my heart into..She supported and was there for me thru my process and when my parents came to my probate they realized how proud I was for making it thru so they were proud too. They know my sisters care a lot about me so they understand more.

[OneTimeSBX]

my parents are opposed to certain GLO's because they feel they are cookie cutter and "clique-ish". When i decided i wanted to pledge anyway, i looked for one that wasnt necessarily well-known, so the intentions on my end were 100% pure. im not passing judgement on anyone who does select a more well known organization, but now that i have crossed my parents know, and they were glad i chose the GLO that i did...

[Kevin]

What do you mean, "come out"? Is it important to you that everyone know you're in a GLO? I mean, it may be a big deal for you, but if they don't like those organizations, what's the big deal? Do what you do.. have your car decals, your letters, if someone asks you a question, you answer it.. but really.. are you wanting to sit on the phone all night going through your high school telephone directory letting everyone know that you pledged a sorority?

They should probably be able to figure it out by looking at your myspace page.

[cutie_cat_4ever]

Originally Posted by Kevin

What do you mean, "come out"? Is it important to you that everyone know you're in a GLO? I mean, it may be a big deal for you, but if they don't like those organizations, what's the big deal? Do what you do.. have your car decals, your letters, if someone asks you a question, you answer it.. but really.. are you wanting to sit on the phone all night going through your high school telephone directory letting everyone know that you pledged a sorority?

They should probably be able to figure it out by looking at your myspace page.

I guess what the OP really meant is that sometimes you may want to share stories about what happen with your life (school, greek etc) with your other friends and family who are not greek, and to reference, you may need to tell them you are affiliated with a certain GLO. Not necessary in a oh-I-need-to-tell-everyone-I-am-Greek way. And most of the times, as the OP says, those non greek family and friends will give you a weird stare.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Kevin

What do you mean, "come out"?

Originally Posted by cutie_cat_4ever

I guess what the OP really meant is that sometimes you may want to share stories about what happen with your life (school, greek etc) with your other friends and family who are not greek, and to reference, you may need to tell them you are affiliated with a certain GLO. Not necessary in a oh-I-need-to-tell-everyone-I-am-Greek way. And most of the times, as the OP says, those non greek family and friends will give you a weird stare.

She said pretty clearly what she meant:

Originally Posted by LadyLight

Does anybody have stories about how they told parents or unsupportive friends they went Greek? What's the best way to do I do it?

As for parents and family -- just tell them, and be ready to tell them why and what it means to you. You might follow SAEalumnus's idea of having a new member handbook or something else for them to look at to get a better idea of what it's all about.

As for friends/everyone else -- don't worry about it. If it comes up, it comes up; if it doesn't, it doesn't.

[ΑΓΔSquirrel10]

My mom got a little jealous. I would come home every weekend and spend time with her, but after I was initiated I had to do some stuff on the weekends, so she missed my company. But I think she's getting better about it, because I've been able to show her that I can do all of my work and have a life with and without the sorority. It takes time though

[Educatingblue]

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

I only know one person who struggled to "come out" as a member of a GLO. This person's parents were opposed to Greekdom for religious reasons.

You must be talking about my mother! She was really opposed to the whole idea. She went to a Bible college that had no greek life. She said that her school justified no greek system with "We do not want any organization that separates man." I can't really see how that is the case when most orgs pride themselves on unity.

The good part is she is "slowly" changing her way of thinking.