A Store Called the "N" word! (N word thread)

[DST Love]

Well I saw it and I don't know if you all watched Road Rules 8 with Ayanna but I thought she was kind of crazy then. Personally, I think she went way too far. This guy clearly does not know a lot about race relations in the US nor should he have to. Do all of us know about race relations in every country in the world? I doubt it. All I'm saying is I would've kindly explained to him the history and meaning of the word and how it is perceived when someone white uses it. Now if he continued to use it after the fact, then that would be a different story. Anyway, Ayanna made herself look crazy by hitting him and not even at least talking first. If you noticed Kamilah was a lot more calm when she was explaining it to him. That's exactly how I would have handled it. You cannot get too angry with people for something they do not know. Just simply take the time to educate them.

[Reds695]

I saw the epsiode and I don't think she should have been kicked off of the show. Whereas we my not have swung on him, others may have. It really depends on your experience and the amount of racism that you have experienced in life. I do think that MTV down played the fact that he used a racial slur and they did not address the issue. I also think the the other black people on the show did not support her. MTV's Real World/Road Rules has always shown blacks in a negative light. They put blacks on there that they know are going to be high strung. I don't know if anyone saw other episodes but Christian was also saying previously that they were talking Jive. I don't think the white castmates could relate to the way that she felt, because they will never know how it feels to be black. Although Julie did try to stick up for her.

[AKAtude]

I haven't seen the show in ages so I wouldn't know where to begin, but a comment got my attention.

This guy clearly does not know a lot about race relations in the US nor should he have to. Do all of us know about race relations in every country in the world? I doubt it

Obviously he just didn't know any better and hitting him can't be justified. If black folks would learn to strike that word from their vocabulary, it wouldn't be a problem! However, I don't know very much about race relations in every country, but if I were going there you bet I would find out as much as I could before setting foot on their soil, especially the things they would find offensive!

[DST Love]

Originally posted by AKAtude:
I haven't seen the show in ages so I wouldn't know where to begin, but a comment got my attention.

Obviously he just didn't know any better and hitting him can't be justified. If black folks would learn to strike that word from their vocabulary, it wouldn't be a problem! However, I don't know very much about race relations in every country, but if I were going there you bet I would find out as much as I could before setting foot on their soil, especially the things they would find offensive!

I agree with you however, again, there are more mature ways to handle situations. And while you can read and research as much as you want, a lot of learning will probably come from your interaction with those actual countrymen and not just what you research. There is no way for everyone to know everything about a country. And even after all the research you do, if you made a mistake and a person started hitting you without you even understanding why, how would you feel. I'm not justifying what he said I'm just saying that he didn't even get a chance until after the fact to understand what he had done.

Also, Black people are not the only race of people who live in America. So it'd be quite hard to research race relations.

[This message has been edited by DST Love (edited February 14, 2001).]

[1 Woman of Virtue]

Originally posted by GorgeousNikki:
The "N" word is unacceptable...(he is Norweign. His exact words were "I hear you people call each other "Ni**er" all the time, how was I to know that it was an racial slur"
Dang y'all!

Exactly. He didn't know, we may wish that he did, but he didn't. Now the sista could have made it a teachable moment, and EDUCATED bro-man on WHY the word is so troublesome. The he could have expressed his confusion at hearing Blacks use the word, and she could have educated him some more. Instead, he's confused, and has a lump where his eye shoulc be, and she's off the show feeling salty. Yeah, we get tired of having to be the "educator", but that's life.

[B]I once heard someone say that they can use it because they own their blackness. [B]

Owning your blackness and owning a word designed to denigrate blackness are two different things. The sooner we learn that as a people, the less we'll have to deal w/ people who "hear [us] people use the word...all the time"

[exquizit]

Originally posted by DST Love:
Well I saw it and I don't know if you all watched Road Rules 8 with Ayanna but I thought she was kind of crazy then.

I have to agree with you. That sista has issues! She was always going off on someone or something. She didn't have to hit the guy. Granted anyone of us would be upset violence was totally un-called for.

[AKAtude]

I said hitting him could not be justified (just in case that sentence was missed). She could have taken that as an opportunity to educate. The United States is a complex country so "do as the Romans do" doesn't work here.

Certain words in the English language take on different meanings in different English speaking countries. Before I said any word that I wasn't familiar with, I think I would find out what it means. Of course, that is just what I would do. I would rather be safe than sorry.

[DELTABRAT]

WOW!

I didn't see it.

Yeah. For some reason we feel like we have some type of ownership of the word and therefore the right to use it.

It's similar with the word b__ch. I've seen two women come up and be BEST FRIENDS and greet each other like "What's up hoe?" Or "What's up b__ch." It's like "Nothin' tramp." However, if a man calls a woman a hoe, tramp or otherwise...IT'S ON!!!

There's some feeling that belonging to the group allows one to utilize these derogatory terms as terms of endearment.

I am in Los ANgeles. I hear Caucasians and Hispanic people call each other N-I double G-A all the time. No one comes up and says "Hey, y'all ain't n*ggas, I am. Don't let me hear you say that again." But behind closed doors, people talk about it. How everyone is a n*gga, now. I don't go up to my African American sistahs and say "Hey Chicana." or to my male friends and say "Hey, ese." These words have meaning and although not negative to Hispanic people, still I feel like I do not have the "right" to use them.

Who knows, if dogs could speak perhaps they'd tell us they were pissed off because we refer to our TRUE homies as our "dawgs..."

I would have simply dialogued with the young man. Perhaps asked him if he didn't know it was a racial slur, what exactly did he think the word meant and take it from there.

Sorry so long.

[novella000]

I saw it.... Ayanna IS crazy.... Well, better said, she is person who feels things VERY deeply. She's got a plethora of reasons to have issues -- primarily, her mom died last year...
~HOWEVER~
The "violence" (so-called) on the little Norweigan boy WAS unjustified and unmerited ...
Ayanna is a pretty intelligent chick -- and she knew he didn't know any better. She spent her entire Road Rules trip abroad, on a boat.... & I am sure she didn't have Tips & Tricks for Happy Race Relations Handook (vol.1) . She knows how different EACH culture on this globe is. Anyway, she used to throw stuff and act crazy when she was out at sea on Road Rules, so it's hard for people not to think she's a nut and be afraid of her (remember the voo-doo episode -- w/ the matches and powder? LOL )...
I can understand MTV's standpoint -- cuz they asked ol' girl point blank if she would handle it differently another time aound -- she said "no"... out the door I say. Then she tried to make it their fault... "They're throwing me off... I am not LEAVING, I am kicked off..." She knew the rules.
But they didn't have to make an entire show about it. MTV has been contributing to the general public's negative conception that Blacks have issues with controlling themselves (one way or another). Not all of us are in need of Anger Management classes.
PLUS ~~ We don't get the benefit of seeing the entire story... Remember, it's all edited. I guess the revolution (and all of the tiny ones in between) will not be televised after all....

On another note... I did like how Kamillah approached the situation... She pulled ol' boy to the side and told him to holla' at her if he needed some schooling on race relations!!!
LOL!!
Educate, Educate, Educate.

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"No matter how worthy, admirable or fiercely desired the goal may be, it takes commitment and action to make it a reality."

[This message has been edited by novella000 (edited February 14, 2001).]

Hopefully someone out there is an MTV Real World/ Road Rules fan like me. If so, did you happen to catch last night's episode? It was soley devoted to Ayanna's (the only African-American female on the RR team) being kicked off the show. Long story short, a white-male cast mate made a joke using the "N" word. Ayanna totally lost it and struck him. Granted I would have totally flipped. The "N" word is unacceptable however, neither is violence. In the end where I should have felt offended and sided with her, I found myself feeling compassionate towards the white male. One reason being, was that he has no knowledge of the level of offense African-Americans take with this word (he is Norweign. His exact words were "I hear you people call each other "Ni**er" all the time, how was I to know that it was an racial slur"
Dang y'all! How the heck is it that in 2001 there are still people (black and white) that don't know that using this word is totally unacceptable regardless of your race.
I once heard someone say that they can use it because they own their blackness. How ignorant is that argument.
I guess I said all this to pose the question what would you have done? I might have flipped on him and later calmly explained to him why I was offended. I would have never put my hands on him (unless he was making a direct statement towards me and one thing led to another, well you know) So get at me y'all! I'm curious to hear everyone's thoughts on this, especially the brothers who embrace the term.

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"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful"

[SweetestDiva]

Ayanna was a little wild on her season - and the voodoo thing was a bit much. She's the second black female to be kicked off Road Rules for violence, Gladys being the first. Kameelah seems to be really educated though.. I know she just graduated from Stanford pre-med - and is also a woman of Alpha Kappa Alpha.

[loviest95]

I saw it too (well about the last 10 minutes)

I was just wondering did it seem that the whole team was just upset about what the "sista" did and not what caused it?

My hubby and I felt that though violence is unacceptable
shouldn't that guy have to take some kinda multi cultural cousre or something

[Classy_Diva5]

I agree with the fact that she should have talked to the man before hitting him, but what is NOT fair is the fact that she got kicked off. The Real World Seattle had a similar incident, where an Af. American man (cannot remember his name), slapped one of the roomies (a woman-mind you-because she called him a homosexual), but instead of the producers kicking him off of the show, they decided to let the roomies do a vote to see if they wanted him to remain (he was voted to stay)...

Why is it that Ayanna is always picked on when she stars on a season of Real World/Road Rules?? When they tried to accuse her of practicing voodoo, NOT ONE stood by her. How many of us sprinkle baby powder on the sheets to make them smell fresh? From time to time, I know that I do! How many of us light incense every now and then?
But when she accused Veronica of plagarism (and she had proof to back it up), of COURSE everyone stood up for Veronica. I think that they can't handle the fact that Ayanna is outspoken, and very direct. There were other ways she could have handled the situation than resorting to physical confrontation, but I see a sense of bias with the producers of these two shows.

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"Mind ya own, stay true to ya own, be ya own."
Peace and God Bless
Classy_Diva5

[Serenity]

I didn't see this episode, but I did see the Semester at Sea with Ayanna. I think a lot of her behavior stems from the fact that her mother was battling cancer and then finally succumbed to the disease. I don't know. People grieve in different ways. And there is no time limit when you're dealing with loss. I think she needs some kind of therapy (at the very least) to let it all out.

Classy_Diva5: Steven was the name of the young man that was sent to anger management classes. It seemed to have done wonders for him.

As for Veronica on "RR/SAS" I think she should've gotten kicked off. She was not only a liar (she clearly plagiarized that paper) she was also a thief. Remember how she stole Apuaa's shirt and hid it in her closet? Then she tried to get Apuaa make up some lie about the whole situation. That Veronica is trouble. To add insult to injury, MTV then had the nerve to put her on its RR/RW Challenge show. How did her trailer mates live with her? Did they not watch her on SAS? Did they have their stuff on lockdown?

[lastpoetnsite]

Greetings laydiez...I haven't posted here before but I thought I would since I wrote an editorial about this very subject in my school newspaper which was printed today and should be online next week.

In any case, my whole beef with the show is that...it is true Ayanna has some emotional issues she needs to work on (losing a parent can be a real emotional rollercoaster )and I do not condone her hitting Christian (the young white man from Norway)...BUT...the producers kicked her off not only because she would do the same thing again if the situation occured but they also had the nerve to ask her to appologize to him and they did not ask him to appologize to her.

Now...the arguement that "oh he didn't know any better" in my mind is a crock of B.S. simply because would we be this lenient if this young man was from a small town in the United States? I think not. I attend a small satellite campus and believe me I have met white people on this campus that have never ever in their lives met a person of color until they came to my school. Shocking but true.

So this sympathy that we give him is not really deserved. It is hard for me to believe that if he knew the word n*gger then he also had a vague notion about the conotation of those words. His foreigner status does not remove him from scrutiny.
The other issues that pissed me off about the show was that no one in the RR cast stuck up for her.

The Real World Cast especially Kameelah and Julie (the Mormon girl...go figure!) stood up for her. In fact, Laterrian was one of the main ones putting Ayanna down.

Now the violence, was completely uncalled for but if someone should have been kicked off and we're going to play the "lets protect people" game. Then how about kicking Ayanna off for violence, Laterrian for the whole "white ass" comment that started the mess, and Christian for using the n-word. All of these things could be considered offensive and warrent removal from the cast.

But...and this is my final thought...if you look back at the history of RW/RR (especially RW) you will note the interesting racial situations that are played out on the show. Notice that when there is a black person on the show they are in a few small categories: ignorant of blackness, pimp/playa, (too cool so they never show them: i.e. Mohammed from the San Francisco real world), "angry", "lets just all get along". Think about it.

Thanks for letting me share. Sorry it was so long. Peace

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http://cda.mrs.umn.edu/~chrismos
http://popimpstress.blogspot.com

"If I could have convinced more slaves that they were slaves, I could have freed thousands more."
---Harriet Tubman

"Only when lions have historians, will hunters cease being heroes"
---African Proverb

[This message has been edited by lastpoetnsite (edited February 15, 2001).]

[This message has been edited by lastpoetnsite (edited February 15, 2001).]