New Book By an Alpha Man -"A Good Man Deferred"

[MsAnn]

Hello All,

This past summer, I attended a conference in Ohio where I had the chance to meet the author of a newly published book "A Good Man Deferred - Tales From the Friend Zone." He was set up with his table in the corner of the room with a copy of his book standing up for all to see. I thought the cover looked rather interesting, so a friend and I decided to go over and talk to him. We were engaged in conversation with this young man for about 20 minutes and I must say that he had some very interesting views about women. My only problem was that he seemed to be a little bitter. I suspected that he had been in some pretty bad past relationships. Anyway, he had just received the books from the publisher (they were still in the box) and he was selling it to people at the conference for $10.00. Being that he was a young Black author (and a Frat) I bought a copy.

The thing that bothers me about the book is that no matter what he says, I feel as if he places all women into a certain category based on his own past experiences with women. I got so upset a couple of times reading this book that I would sometimes put it down and not pick it up for 3 or 4 days. I won't go into any detail because I don't want to ruin it for anyone who wants to read it. I will say that it was pretty obvious that he needed to write this book as a vent, to let all of his past women know how they made him feel. In the beginning of the book, you may tend to feel sorry for him, but you will see what I'm talking about if you keep reading. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bashing his book. As a matter of fact, I recommend it. He has a lot of good points, but I think he needs to REALLY get over his past so that he can see just how diverse women are as individuals. In other words, there ARE some good ones out there. You can visit the book's website at http://www.agoodmandeferred.com. The book is selling for $13.00 plus $2.00 for shipping and handling. It may take a while to give everyone a chance to read it (if you like), but I would love to know your opinions about the book.

[MsAnn]

I forgot to add that the views presented in this book are targeted toward BLACK women, not women in general. Just a little something to keep in mind while reading it. But then, its inevitable throughout the book.

[sphinxpoet]

You have to remember there are women out there just like there are men that do the same. They choose women that are bad for them just as women do.

[MsAnn]

If I read your post correctly sphinxpoet, I agree with what you are saying. Some women, like some men do with women, choose men that are bad for them. That is exactly what I was trying to say in my post. The author of this book was one of those who chose and was attracted to women who were not good for him. But, these women knew how to make themselves appealing to him. When I talked to him, he asked me to spread the word about his book, no matter how I felt after reading it. That's all I'm doing. Thanks for the response. I do agree with what you said.

[Professor]

MsAnn,

You did not give such a vivid description of my frat's book on the APhiA site. I understand why many may not like such a book. I W A S in the same situation as my frat from what you have discribed. I plan to pick up a copy this weekend.

Let me also add - - I don't know why people fall into these traps. With all my education and training I only recently figured out what's good for me. Maybe if others read my frat's book it will help them out of their situations also.
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[MsAnn]

Professor,

Forgive my brief insight into the book on your site. That was my reason for inviting anyone reading on the Alpha site to read the thread that I left on our board. I agree that the author's experiences could probably help someone, man or woman, in a situation like he was in. I stayed pretty open minded while reading his book, and like I said, he made some really valid points. However, you have to put yourself in his shoes to really understand why he is saying what he is saying. I hope you enjoy the book. Let me know what you think!