Please pull your head out of your boyfriend's @$$: a vent

[33girl]

Umm, when I said "what are YOU doing tomorrow night" I meant YOU, not you and your boyfriend, who you know I don't really care for.

Why are you too mysteriously broke to go out with your girlfriends, but you can afford to buy perfume, jewelry and CD's?

Why would you eagerly go up to the old alma mater every other year, but now it's "too expensive" (see above) and "why bother seeing people I see all the time anyway?" (you don't see us all the time anymore, you are holed up with BF)

Why are you making bullshit excuses as to why you are doing everything his way? Excuses that if I made for Mr. 33, you'd rip me a new one.

Does it not tell you anything when your parents, friends and probably the Irish Setter down the block really do not like this guy and avoid any discussion of him? (i.e. if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all)

OK, that is my vent. Thank you

[AlphaSigLana]

I hear you!!!

[Tom Earp]

WOW 33Girl, I think I can see your Point as have Been There!

Aint A Pretty Sight!


But Life Do Go On and remember one and all, You Have Freinds Here That YOU can talk to!

We are not Heathens just Ordinary Folks who have been down the road!!!!!!!!!!

[sororitygirl2]

I think this reminds us all of one or two of our friends... and, sadly, perhaps ourselves at times! I know that early on in relationships I have sometimes gotten a little too caught up in the boy, but never to the point of ditching my friends completely. So sad... especially when their hearts get broken and they come running back (isn't it hard not to say "I told you so?")!

[Fewdfreak]

I have friends that will ditch for a boy, not realize it, and deny it when you confront them, but when they break up with their boy, and another friend does the same thing, they say, "Why do you leave us for boys?" and my other friends say, "Because you did it to us..." Which doesn't make it right, but why does everything have to be complicated by guys... I'd never let a relationship with a guy ruin a friendship.

[Munchkin03]

I have some friends who do that...even after a year or so. Some have gone as far to drop activities (and i'm sure their grades have suffered), and are completely alone when CoDependent Boy decides she isn't "loving" enough. I have one friend in particular who did this, when I started dating Mr. Munchkin03, told me I needed "to set limits" (keep in mind we're long distance). Gimme a break.

[Jaggergirl]

Ugh, it is so frustrating to see a friend completely replace her life with one that revolves around the BF. I hate watching it.

I have a friend who is suddenly going to church and considering not being a vegetarian anymore becuase of her boyfriend. It's very strange to witness. I just wonder how they feel about themselves when they've turned into a whole new person for this BF and then they break up anyway?

[aephi alum]

I can top that...

I have a truly psycho ex-boyfriend. He was totally hung up on marrying someone of the same religion as himself, which is fine except that he would only date girls of -different- religions.

We'd been dating for several months when one day, out of the blue, he asked me if I would convert to his religion. I said, no, I was not going to choose something as important as what God to believe in based on someone else's desires. Thus endeth the relationship.

However, both the girl he dated before me and the girl he dated after me (to whom he got engaged) -did- agree to convert. I'm not sure what happened to the girl he dated before me, but his fiancee finally grew a backbone and decided she really wanted to be yet a third religion - and of course he dumped her on the spot

You just can't let your life revolve around someone else. It's not healthy, particularly if that someone else goes away.

[PM_Mama00]

Bros before hoes...

Sistas before mistas...

Hold that true and others will too. Remind your friend that when that boyfriend is gone, her friends will still be there, and she is going to regret messing up friendships while she is with him.

[ladyj39]

I completely understand your situation and it's so frustrating!!!!

One of my best friends started going out with this guy and completely changed! Suddenly, she's too tired to go out withher girlfriends, or doesn't have any money. But, she'll meet up with her boyfriend to go dancing when he gets off work at 2am! I haven't seen her for two weeks, and haven't really hung out with her for about a month. She didn't return my calls or e-mails until they broke up last week. All of a sudden, she wanted to go out and e-mailed me. I was busy, so I told her I couldn't go. I haven't heard from her since. Now I hear from another friend that she got back together with him. I'll probably never see her again....

[33girl]

Haha, this came up in related threads. Quite the blast from the past. This was pretty much when my friendship with this person started fraying and never completely recovered, although I didn't realize it at the time.

Don't dump your friends for a little sumpin sumpin, kids.

[ASTalumna06]

When I started reading this thread title, I thought it was spam

[xibair]

I thought it was spam too. Though it was fun to read.

[AZTheta]

I got news for you guys. This behavior (ditching friends for a partner) continues throughout life. Nobody has that kind of time. And people don't forget being ditched, either. It sucks.

I completely understand that having children often changes the dynamic in a friendship. This is different. And not cool.