Re-Rushing as a Sophomore

UCLArusher · #1 07-24-2007, 05:47 PM

Hey there, I am really nervous about rush this fall. Here is my story:
I was very excited to rush last year as a freshmen and went through the whole process of rush, making it to bid day. My pref night was rough, I had one house I loved and one I hated. Come bid day I got the house I hated and was devistated.

The rest of the year I was so sad to not be in a house, even though I made friends and enjoyed myself. This year I am going back and trying again. The thing is I feel even more nervous this time since I will be a sophomore, and the rush form I filled out required me to say that I have received (which at UCLA also means accepted) a bid. I am worried houses will see this and not give me a chance.

Joining a sorority is hugely important to me. I am getting recs, multiple recs in some cases, for a few of my favorite houses.

Do I even stand a chance? Tips? Advice?

adpiucf · #2 07-24-2007, 05:56 PM

Recs aren't a big deal at UCLA, so don't go too overboard. There are some UCLA chapters that strongly prefer freshmen, but several others that will bid sophomores.

Give it a try and be yourself. I'm not sure what the numbers look like nowadays, but about 5 years ago, every sorority held additional events after formal recruitment b/c they still had room to take members. So long as you don't sign a bid card at formal, you would be eligible to attend those kinds of events and potentially receive a bid this way.

Good luck! You are at a great school in a wonderful location-- with tons of stuff to do!

I miss LA.

bejazd · #3 07-25-2007, 12:08 PM

That's kind of odd. (I mean asking the PNM to say if she'd ever been offered a bid at that campus.) All the sororities know she was offered a bid, and that she didn't take it. They didn't have to ask. seems kinda nosy to me!

Gentle PNM, you might want to think ahead how you're going to answer some potentially awkward questions about that. And even if no one asks you outright, they'll still be thinking it, so you might have to be prepared to make your own statement to clear the air. For example, when you go on a job interview, you're advised never to say anything bad about former bosses or employers (i.e they sucked! they were such jerks! I hated them!) because the interviewer tends to side with your former boss more than you, the interviewee.

Go into recruitment with the attitude that you're going to give all the chapters a fresh look, and they will do the same for you! UCLA is such a neat campus....I truly hope you find your home!

AlphaFrog · #4 07-25-2007, 12:38 PM

If you have a chapter that you end up preffing that you absolutely hate, and know you would not accept a bid, DO NOT LIST THEM ON YOUR PREF/BID card. If your Rho Chi tries to tell you that you have to, she is misinformed.

adpiucf · #5 07-25-2007, 12:46 PM

Honestly, at UCLA, the chapters don't really talk much with one another-- so no one is going to know if she ended up pledging anywhere the year prior/dropped out unless they have memorized her application. That doesn't happen so much at this school, from my experience with the ADPi's there and from conversations with my friends who were in other UCLA chapters.

Unless she's been hanging around the Greeks all year and has a positive or negative social reputation among the Greek community, it very likely won't be an issue.

Likely, the chapter you pledged last year won't remember you if you dropped out a week or so into the new member program. Double that if you didn't even come back after Bid Day. There's too much going on in those first few weeks.

At the chapter you dropped, I'd imagine the majority of members rushing on the floor pledged last year. Trust me, they don't care and probably don't even remember you if you dropped really early on.

So while you will put on the form that you accepted a prior bid, I wouldn't even worry about bringing this up in conversation at the events. There are a lot of girls coming through recruitment, and the members are not going to hone in on one application and say, "Oh she accepted a bid somewhere else last year. We're just not giving her a chance at all."

And there's no guarantee that the ones who do remember you will be the ones rushing you this year... you remember from last year you don't meet every single sorority member. And rush was last year. UCLA has a lot going on. Someone may think they recognize you from somewhere, but I'd be shocked if you got the same girl rushing you 2 years in a row who ALSO remembers rushing you last year. They meet 100s of girls each day at recruitment.

Every member you meet at each sorority is a new opportunity to wow the Greek System. Every person you meet is getting a first impression of you. Don't dwell on the past-- just go in, be yourself and see what happens.

Some may disagree with this, but... Don't mention that you rushed last year or accepted a bid last year, unless you are asked about it. I can pretty much guarantee you that no one is going to ask you about that. If you get a "Hey, you look familiar," you can always say, "Oh I'm a sophomore majoring in Underwater Basket Weaving. What's your major?"

You aren't being deceptive-- it is in your paperwork that you pledged last year and dropped, but take the time at an event to focus on positives and leave them with a strong impression of the great well-rounded girl you are. You don't want to leave their house and they mention to one another, "Did you talk to the girl who rushed last year and dropped her bid to XYZ?"

AlphaFrog · #6 07-25-2007, 12:55 PM

I agree with everything adpiucf said -

I went to a school with a small Greek system. There was a girl who came to a couple of informal events and we gave a bid to her. She never showed up to accept it. Two weeks later, I don't think I could have picked her out of a lineup, and there were only a few girls at that informal party...instead of formal rush where you see hundreds of girls. It's likely that no one, even the chapter that bid you, will remember you.

33girl · #7 07-25-2007, 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

If you have a chapter that you end up preffing that you absolutely hate, and know you would not accept a bid, DO NOT LIST THEM ON YOUR PREF/BID card. If your Rho Chi tries to tell you that you have to, she is misinformed.

The reason women are told that is that some of the computer systems kick out people who suicide or don't put the max amount of sororities on their card and they end up not getting bids. My solution to that - if there are prefs you went to that you don't want to be in - is put on the sorority that cut you after first round that you have not a snowball's chance in hell to get a bid from. That way your card is full and the program won't kick you out.

Oh, and if the Rho Chi tells you you can't do this, tell her you can list whatever you want. Because you can.

UCLArusher · #8 07-26-2007, 02:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

The reason women are told that is that some of the computer systems kick out people who suicide or don't put the max amount of sororities on their card and they end up not getting bids. My solution to that - if there are prefs you went to that you don't want to be in - is put on the sorority that cut you after first round that you have not a snowball's chance in hell to get a bid from. That way your card is full and the program won't kick you out.

Oh, and if the Rho Chi tells you you can't do this, tell her you can list whatever you want. Because you can.

genius! i'll remember that. b/c yeah, that was the exact reason i even listed the one i hated... i had to!

SoCalGirl · #9 07-26-2007, 02:58 AM

I don't try to scare off newbies so please don't think I'm trying to be mean but I must pick the nit!

Rushees are rushed by Rushers. You would be a Rushee. Not a Rusher. Unless you're actually in a chapter and on the other side of rush.

I feel better now.

UCLArusher · #10 07-26-2007, 03:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

I don't try to scare off newbies so please don't think I'm trying to be mean but I must pick the nit!

Rushees are rushed by Rushers. You would be a Rushee. Not a Rusher. Unless you're actually in a chapter and on the other side of rush.

I feel better now.

oops

haha, guess that shows how lost i am in this whole thing

bejazd · #11 07-26-2007, 10:27 AM

Okay, UCLARusher, so you made a mistake when you listed a sorority that you didn't actually intend to accept a bid from. Is it a mortal mistake? No. I'm just saying that you know that refusing a bid could potentially bother some people who are evaluating your potential as a sister...because they are considering you vs a ton of other women and considering if they offer you an invitation, will you accept it? But you already knew that, which is why you asked the question in the first place, right?

You are going to meet a lot of different women this year as anywhere from 1/3 to 1/2 of the chapter membes will have just joined in the last year themselves (another great reason to give all the chapters a fresh look!) And now that you've been on campus awhile you probably know women in all the houses. I'm just saying that it might be to your benefit to be prepared to say something to the effect of "I was overwhelmed before, and now I've spent a year thinking about what sorority membership means to me, and what I have to offer, and what I'm looking for...and now I know that I'm truly ready to make decisions I wasn't ready to make before" or something like that. But it's gotta be sincere, so if you don't mean it, don't say it.

I hope that helps! Go Bruins!