New School, New Sorority?

nicci8702 · #1 06-22-2009, 10:54 PM

I have a question for anyone that can answer it. (Bear with me, the story is a bit long but I promise it'll make sense.)

I rushed and was initiated into a sorority (which shall not be named) at the college I used to attend. I was active for two semesters and then I got really sick, (we're talking chemotherapy and radiation treatments sick) and I was forced to withdrawal from my school and return home. During this, I withdrew from school and tried my best to make the transition as painless as possible, however with the chapter that I had joined, I was having troubles getting the information I needed as far as medical leave, becoming inactive, etc. (I wasn't sure if I would ever end up back at that school). In any case, I've gotten better, but during my treatments I was ...short on medical insurance so I was left with a hefty bill from my doctors and that made it difficult to pay for my obligations with my chapter.

I am planning on attending the university in my home town, and I called up the girls from my old chapter and spoke with some of our advisers to see if I would be eligible to join the chapter at my new university. However, I was told that they had processed paperwork to deactivate me(?) and that I was no longer a sister of that sorority. Aside from being blindsided with this information, I didn't even know they could do that without me at least knowing about it. Especially since I was in the middle of treatment.

So, my question is: Since they had apparently "kicked me out", or whatever am I forever ineligible to be initiated in to that sorority, or any other for that matter? I miss the sisterhood, I miss being a part of something so much bigger than myself. And I am desperately wanting to be a part of something like that again, if I can find a place that I am welcome and a place that I can call home again. Does anyone have any ideas on this situation?

gee_ess · #2 06-22-2009, 11:07 PM

First
You say you have been initiated into a sorority. Assuming it is an NPC sorority, you are not going to be eligible for any other.

Second
I do not know the details regarding your "deactivation", but I think, judging from what you have told us regarding your illness, a call to your national headquarters to get clarification regarding your options would be in order. In this instance, you should get the most definitive answer going this route.

Good luck with your health issues. I hope you are doing better.

KSUViolet06 · #3 06-22-2009, 11:07 PM

Whether you can re-join the sorority depends on the sorority national policies.

Certain sororities allow for members to be re-instated (depending on the circumstances).

I'd contact the person at the sorority HQ who deals with this sort of thing for more info.

However, you may not join another if you have been initiated.

jennyj87 · #4 06-22-2009, 11:08 PM

Talk to your nationals. Each sorority differs with their "kicked me out" process.

LAblondeGPhi · #5 06-22-2009, 11:10 PM

nicci8702,

I'm so glad that you are getting better! It sounds like you are a very strong, amazing young woman.

My advice is to get in contact with the international (or national, depending on the organization) headquarters. Make your case and explain what happened. Stay in contact with the old chapter and ask for copies of EVERYTHING. Ask for copies of records from International, too.

Different organizations work differently, so I can't really tell you what the path will look like. My best advice is to stay persistent, but be respectful about it.

nicci8702 · #6 06-22-2009, 11:13 PM

I really appreciate your responses. I might add, that any financial obligations that I did have, have been met and paid, in full.

I certainly hope something can be done, because the situation wasn't one where I was simply refusing to do anything or one where I didn't care. It really really was out of my control. And thank you for the warm wishes on getting better. I'm working on it.

LAblondeGPhi · #7 06-22-2009, 11:17 PM

Please keep us up-to-date on the what happens!

Good luck!

nicci8702 · #8 06-22-2009, 11:20 PM

I will most definitely do so.

AnchorAlumna · #9 06-23-2009, 12:02 AM

If you withdrew from school, you should have had alumna status.

You may have been "kicked out" due to unpaid bills at the time.
Definitely contact your national/international office on this.
Much good luck to you!

nicci8702 · #10 06-23-2009, 12:03 AM

Yeah, they never mentioned alumna status to me. Again, I hope I can be reinstated, at this new school, because it was a financial issue and it wasn't a moral issue at all.

jennyj87 · #11 06-23-2009, 12:14 AM

good luck!

LatinaAlumna · #12 06-23-2009, 02:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicci8702

However, I was told that they had processed paperwork to deactivate me(?) and that I was no longer a sister of that sorority.

WHAAAAT?????

What kind of sorority deactivates a sister who is undergoing such a serious illness? My gosh, if this happened to me, I know my sisters would not only be visiting me everyday, but would be out there fundraising to help me pay the medical bills. Deactivating me or putting me on "alumna" status would be the LAST thing they would do, and I am 100% sure about this. I'm sorry, ladies, but I just don't get NPC sororities sometimes.

To the original poster, I am very glad to hear that you are better and are going back to school.

violetpretty · #13 06-23-2009, 03:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

If you withdrew from school, you should have had alumna status.

You may have been "kicked out" due to unpaid bills at the time.
Definitely contact your national/international office on this.
Much good luck to you!

My org has similar policies. I would think that any member who withdrew from school would automatically be granted early alumna status, and you could be reinstated at your new school, possibly if you pay off your debt to your old chapter?

However, if the bills piled up BEFORE you withdrew from school, like more than a semester of being in school and not paying dues, as opposed to being paid up when you withdrew from school, I could see why your chapter would have financially expelled you.

Did your chapter President and/or VP Finance make attempts to contact you or your family about the situation? Were you confronted about your unpaid bills and warned about financial expulsion? ( I understand that you and your family definitely had other, more important things on your mind, but I think it's very strange that they wouldn't have known your situation or tried to warn you.) I would think your badge and membership certificate would have to be collected to complete your expulsion too.

BOTTOM LINE: Each NPC has different policies, so you'll need to check your org's policies and figure out what happened and figure out if you are eligible to join your sorority's chapter at your new school.

As others have pointed out, you may not join another NPC, no matter what.

violetpretty · #14 06-23-2009, 03:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LatinaAlumna

WHAAAAT?????

What kind of sorority deactivates a sister who is undergoing such a serious illness? My gosh, if this happened to me, I know my sisters would not only be visiting me everyday, but would be out there fundraising to help me pay the medical bills. Deactivating me or putting me on "alumna" status would be the LAST thing they would do, and I am 100% sure about this. I'm sorry, ladies, but I just don't get NPC sororities sometimes.

To the original poster, I am very glad to hear that you are better and are going back to school.

Let's not make this a "NPC vs non-NPC" battle. I have a feeling there is something she is not telling us. Alumna status would be the standard procedure in my org when someone withdraws from school for any reason, with the option of being reinstated when you re-enroll in school or transfer.

kddani · #15 06-23-2009, 06:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LatinaAlumna

What kind of sorority deactivates a sister who is undergoing such a serious illness? My gosh, if this happened to me, I know my sisters would not only be visiting me everyday, but would be out there fundraising to help me pay the medical bills. Deactivating me or putting me on "alumna" status would be the LAST thing they would do, and I am 100% sure about this. I'm sorry, ladies, but I just don't get NPC sororities sometimes.

As said above, don't turn this into an NPC thing. Should we generalize all sororities like yours because of some hazing incident one did?

Also, did the sisters even know about the illness? She hasn't said that she ever even told them. If someone just drops off the face of the earth and doesn't tell anyone, yes, they're going to get disaffiliated.

It is also strongly possible that it is just a mix up of terminology. If she was truly "kicked out", there's a lot of paperwork that goes along with that and the sister isn't exactly in the dark about the process.