Giving Incorrect Recruitment Advice

carnation · #1 04-21-2010, 05:52 PM

Okay folks, I've been hearing a lot from several ticked-off GCers about this and I really need to say something about it. There are some GCers who are giving incorrect recruitment advice to the point that it could harm someone's recruitment if they followed it.

Please do not give advice about a system or school you know nothing about. This includes swearing up and down that you do or don't need recs at a school you know nothing about, advising someone about informal rush, or telling someone what to wear when you actually have no clue about it except for what you've read here. In other words: if your "expertise" only comes from GC, please let women from that school or system advise the PNMs. Recently, a PNM was given extremely incorrect advice and she almost went along with it. I don't blame her for being angry.

There are some women out there who are the first from their family or crowd to try to go Greek and they come here for advice, having no other outlet. Don't mess up their dreams!

KSUViolet06 · #2 04-21-2010, 06:42 PM

I really don't think people who happen to give wrong advice are doing it to intentionally "squash the dreams" of PNMs...

ThetaPrincess24 · #3 04-21-2010, 06:54 PM

Non-greeks and fraternity men need not give sorority recruitment advice. Non-greeks simply dont know how membership selection works in general and fraternity recruitment is totally different than sorority recruitment.

carnation · #4 04-21-2010, 06:59 PM

From where we stand now, we can look back and say, "Yeah, it would be stupid to listen only to people on a message board." That's part of my point! We were all 18 years old once and had the Internet been around like it is now, we might have fervently believed that these Greek women had all the answers. We do have a lot of answers and we can pretty much all answer general stuff!

However, school-specific things... if someone asked for advice on Ivy League recruitment, I'd defer to a woman from that area and allow her to answer because I can only answer SEC questions. But-- some GCers are giving wrong advice on schools they've only seen on a website, if even there! Advice that if followed, would pretty much tank a girl's rush.

I'm not naming names or giving examples; hopefully, the people who are doing this will recognize themselves. Please stay in your own lane!

Gusteau · #5 04-21-2010, 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThetaPrincess24

Non-greeks and fraternity men need not give sorority recruitment advice. Non-greeks simply dont know how membership selection works in general and fraternity recruitment is totally different than sorority recruitment.

Yet sorority women will not cease to give advice on fraternity recruitment (from both sides) here.

Of course people should be mindful of trying to give correct, informed advice, but those seeking advice should acknowledge that any person on a public internet forum may not have informed answers though they pretend to.

(This is not directed at you ThetaPrincess24, or anyone in particular)

KSUViolet06 · #6 04-21-2010, 07:04 PM

But really though, is it all that hurtful if PNM asks if she needs recs at say, Ole Miss, and a GCer who didn't go there says "YES. You need them?"

I think some things are just common knowledge.

I mean, she might not be able to answer "what do I wear?" but I don't think anyone here would dispute that at X or Y school, you're going to need recs.

33girl · #7 04-21-2010, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation

I'm not naming names or giving examples; hopefully, the people who are doing this will recognize themselves. Please stay in your own lane!

They won't, so please do. Not via PM, on the board. I'd certainly like to know if I tanked someone's rush (her personality, appearance, activities and ability to double check advice on her own not being a factor at all of course).

I would never say "guys shouldn't answer rush questions" as I just saw Gusteau give GREAT rush advice about his alma mater today. I'm sure he knows more about GMU rush than a girl who's from another school in the same athletic conference, or same state, etc etc.

Sorry, but I'm going to keep saying "if you go through rush at Bama, you need recs." If you want to delete that post, knock yourself out, but I don't know what it proves.

Gusteau · #8 04-21-2010, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

I would never say "guys shouldn't answer rush questions" as I just saw Gusteau give GREAT rush advice about his alma mater today. I'm sure he knows more about GMU rush than a girl who's from another school in the same athletic conference, or same state, etc etc.

1. Thanks

2. There are plenty of sorority women who give great fraternity recruitment advice as well, and I certainly wouldn't ask them to stop. I recall you advising a potential to never wear jorts, EVER. I mean, that's pretty much golden. I think the key is to not overestimate your own knowledge.

thetygerlily · #9 04-21-2010, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

This is why I think it's super important for PNMs to get to KNOW someone in REAL life who is familiar with the system.

GC is a great resource but it should not be your primary source of recruitment info. It's also not the "gospel" concerning recruitment at your school.

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation

From where we stand now, we can look back and say, "Yeah, it would be stupid to listen only to people on a message board." That's part of my point! We were all 18 years old once and had the Internet been around like it is now, we might have fervently believed that these Greek women had all the answers. We do have a lot of answers and we can pretty much all answer general stuff!

One comment on this one... I agree, in principle. However, not all parts of the country (or world

) are filled with Greeks. I was concidentally talking about this offline with someone else today- my parents didn't go to college, I was the first in the extended family to go to a 4 year school, most teachers in my area went to a college without a Greek system, it's just not that big here, etc. I honestly don't know what I would've done had I needed recs, other than contact local Panhellenic association (although I didn't know that even existed at the time). So for most cases we see, yes- GC should be considered a supplemental source rather than the primary. But that isn't possible in every case.

For the OT, though, sorry to hear someone was given poor advice. That's exactly why I generally refrain from giving specific recruitment advice. Rarely will venture into generic common sense stuff, but not much. I trust others on here to have much better insights than I do in that department!

annabella · #10 04-21-2010, 08:24 PM

I can see (and possibly think of an example) where this would be a problem.

I think it's one thing to say "I don't go there, but anyone will tell you to get recs at Bama," and then provide the link (in this case, to the "you need recs here," sticky or other post where someone from that schoo answered or alluded to the question. Or to specify that you have been through rush there as a PNM, and the girls were wearing such and such on skit day, but that you don't know about the other side of the process yet.

It's another to.... editorialize, and use your friend's aunt's rush at a neighboring school 25 years ago as rationale.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gusteau

I mean, that's pretty much golden. I think the key is to not overestimate your own knowledge.

Yup.

If you genuinely are familiar with a school, I say go for it. If you are only vaguely familiar, it may be more appropriate to PM the person asking questions and suggest contacts and sources. Otherwise, inaccurate advice is just there, in all posterity, for any future PNM searching their schools info.

FSUZeta · #11 04-21-2010, 09:02 PM

i think this is a great idea. general advice, "yes, you need recs. at bama", "it's best not to put all your eggs in one basket","take a shower and brush your teeth before recruitment each day", is one thing.....but i am not going to give someone rushing at ohio university advice, because i have no idea about recruitment at that school, and i would hate to give misinformation,no matter how sincerely i was trying to help the pnm.

carnation · #12 04-21-2010, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gusteau

There are plenty of sorority women who give great fraternity recruitment advice as well, and I certainly wouldn't ask them to stop. I recall you advising a potential to never wear jorts, EVER. I mean, that's pretty much golden. I think the key is to not overestimate your own knowledge.

This.

And what FSUZeta said.

honeychile · #13 04-21-2010, 11:18 PM

I can't possibly be the only person who gets tons of PMs, asking for a rec to a specific school. If it's not in my region, I always explain that the weight of a local rec would be much better than mine, then steer her to someone in that state or school. Especially if it's an SEC or other drama-filled Recruitment school!

I can't imagine which one thread is being referenced, but I'd be willing to bet it's an amalgamation of several people/several threads. (Am I right? Do I win??)

annabella · #14 04-22-2010, 12:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeychile

I can't imagine which one thread is being referenced, but I'd be willing to bet it's an amalgamation of several people/several threads. (Am I right? Do I win??)

I'm thinking this + mostly preemptive. I wouldn't have occurred to me that someone's recruitment could be "ruined," because of advice here (I mean, if they only have the advice of this board and can't determine the level of validity, they were probably screwed to begin with). But I could see it happening sometime down the road, hence the warning?

AnchorAlumna · #15 04-22-2010, 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThetaDancer

I would have agreed, except for the way the OP was worded. The OP had a passive-agressive accusatory tone that I think detracts from the legitimacy of what she was trying to say. It'd be one thing if it were like "hey, don't give bad advice," but instead it's like "some of you (who won't be identified) mess up dreams by giving (unidentified) wretched advice." It also used the "a lot of (unidentified) people back me up!" rationale that drives me nuts on GC.

And it was self-nominated for a sticky, too??? FTW. This is a gem.

Did any of you noticed that the OP is a MODERATOR? And a revered one, too, having been around longer than most of you - longer on GC, and longer on earth.

As a moderator, she's seeing and hearing stuff we don't know about. If Carnation thinks a sticky is necessary, it's OK by me.

I have seen incorrect or off-the-mark info handed out on many threads by many people. Not just 1 thread and not by just 1 or 2 or 4 posters. All she's saying is "think before you post." Good advice for anybody, anywhere, of any age.