A ~bejeweled~ re-rushing story

[peachgirl]

I've been reading stories on here for a while, so I finally decided to share my own! I’ll be sharing my experience of rushing as a freshman and then re-rushing as a sophomore. I’m going to be posting my story in four installments. Hope you enjoy!

~

My story begins the fall of my freshman year. Although I grew up in the South and my mom had an amazing experience in her sorroity, I had never personally given much thought to joining one. This was mainly due to the fact that I had always planned on attending NYU, a school with almost no Greek presence. But my plans changed suddenly and I ended up at a very academic/research-oriented public university in my state that had, to my great surprise, a decent-sized Greek population.

I decided to register for recruitment. The more I learned about Greek life, the more I thought it would be perfect for me.

There are seven NPC sororities that participate in formal fall recruitment at my school. For the sake of this story and the “bejeweled” theme, I’ll call them:

Diamond
Ruby
Emerald
Pearl
Aquamarine
Topaz
Amethyst

The first day of recruitment should have been my first exposure to these chapters, but unfortunately in the weeks before school started, I had allowed myself to be influenced by others’ opinions, stereotypes, and rankings. I decided, for whatever reason, that I really wanted to be a Diamond or Aquamarine. Along with Pearl, I had been told that these chapters made up the “top tier” at my school. Rule Number One if any PNM is reading this: know that forming opinions based on shallow rankings will set you up for an unhappy and disappointing rush experience.

I will spare you the details of the first day of recruitment, which consisted of visiting all seven houses. I thought everything went well. I really wanted Diamond and Aquamarine to like me. All day, I was more focused on how I looked, and was constantly fixing my hair between rounds and making sure my recruitment tee shirt stayed smoothly tucked into my brand-new Lilly Pulitzer shorts (that literally ten other PNMs were wearing…)

Looking back, I realize that my conversations didn’t go past the surface level, and I was more worried about impressing the girls than making a genuine connection with them! At the end of the day, we had to rank our top six chapters we would like to go back to. The one that I “cut” was Ruby.

On the second day, Philanthropy Day, we could return to up to six houses. I opened up my schedule that morning and stared at it blankly. I only had THREE houses. All around me, it seemed like the girls in my Pi Chi group had full schedules. I felt like such a failure. I had been cut by Diamond, Aquamarine, and Pearl (the “top tier” I was so concerned with) and Emerald, the house with the reputation of extremely smart and involved girls. Left on my schedule were Topaz, Amethyst, and Ruby, who had called me back even though I had “cut” them the previous day.

I’m not going to lie, I stared at my little slip of paper for a while trying to hold back tears, wondering what had gone wrong. I wondered why Diamond and Aquamarine, the two houses I really liked, had cut me. But I didn’t have too much time to be upset because that day’s parties were about to start, so off I went to my first party of the day: Ruby.

At Ruby, I didn’t really feel a connection with the girls I talked to, and there were a bunch of awkward pauses in our conversation. They seemed like a sweet bunch, and I could tell that they cared about their philanthropy. I wanted to like them, but I just couldn’t see myself in their house. I couldn’t help but wonder if this was because I knew that they had the reputation of being the “bottom” house on campus.

After my party at Ruby, I had a long break, and so I had the option of leaving the student center ballroom where all the PNMs stayed. I walked around campus, feeling somewhat hopeless about the situation and even considered dropping out of rush. But I decided to stick it out, and after my break, I headed to my next party, which was at Topaz.

The conversations I had with the girls here were more natural, and I liked how involved they were with their philanthropy, even though it wasn’t one I was super enthusiastic about. One of the girls I talked to told me how competitive they were about Greek Week and Homecoming and how they always beat the other sororities, which kind of threw me off since I am about the least competitive person ever. I still left with an overall good impression of this house, though.

My final party of the day was at Amethyst. I was really interested in their philanthropy, because the cause they supported was something that affected my mom directly, and I could see myself being very passionate about it. I had good conversations with most of the girls, even though one asked me some “get to know you” questions I thought were a bit weird (like asking me if I could be any candy, what kind would I be?) but I just wrote it off as quirky but well-meaning.

That night, we were supposed to rank our top four houses, but since I only had three, I just listed them.

At this point in recruitment, I wasn’t convinced that I would want to join any of the three chapters, and I felt left out that my roommate and new friends all seemed to be having “perfect” recruitments. I wasn’t nearly as excited for day three, Skit Day, as they were. I knew I needed a major attitude adjustment if I wanted to make it through the week.

~

To be continued...

[ChioLu]

Oh, a re-rushing story that sounds like it has a happy ending!
Great point on NOT listening to tent talk.

[peachgirl]

ChioLu, luckily it does have a happy ending.

Here is the second installment of my story...

~

Day three of recruitment, Skit Day came around, and that morning sitting with my Pi Chi group in the student center I nervously opened my schedule, unsure of what to expect. The names of just two houses stared back at me: Topaz and Amethyst. I had been dropped by Ruby, but I was okay with that since I hadn’t really felt a connection there the day before.

I headed off to my party at Topaz. I really liked their skit. It was themed after Saturday Night Live and I could tell that they had put a lot of work into making it funny and enjoyable for the PNMs. It seemed like they took a lot of pride in their sisterhood. However, I didn't really click with any of the girls I talked to or have stand-out conversations, which was disappointing. I was starting to feel like I just didn't fit in here. This day was also house tours, so I got a look around Topaz. Being the oldest sorority house (it was built back in the 70s) it seemed to show its age in a few places, and it was also on the furthest possible edge of campus. I couldn’t help but think what a pain it would be to have to walk here for all meals, chapter meetings, etc.

My next party was at Amethyst. I was really warming up to this chapter, but I still wasn’t head over heels in love with them. I did talk to some great girls and found out there are lots of dancers and cheerleaders in this house, which I liked because I did those activities in high school. I also enjoyed their skit, even though it wasn’t as “polished” as Topaz’s skit. After the party I heard other PNMs bashing the skit and saying what a joke this house was, which I let affect my opinions. (Notice a pattern here? DON’T LISTEN TO WHAT OTHERS HAVE TO SAY, FOLLOW YOUR OWN HEART.)

One thing I really didn’t like, though, was Amethyst’s house. They were currently housed in a little cottage on Greek Row while they made plans to build a brand-new house. They didn’t have enough room for everyone inside (this place was TINY) so they were holding rush outside in a big tent behind their house. They also didn’t have a kitchen or meal plan or spaces to hang out or study in the house, which bothered me because I really wanted an actual house where I could spend time with my potential sisters.

Since I didn’t have a full schedule again that day, I had the option of leaving the student center early. We were supposed to rank our top two choices for Pref Night tomorrow, so I put down the two houses I had left.

Again, I was conflicted about my feelings. I didn’t LOVE either of the chapters I visited today, but I didn’t know if that was because I was letting my preconceived opinions cloud my judgment. Amethyst had grown on me, though. I figured that I should at least wait until Pref Night tomorrow, since my Pi Chi had told our group that it was the night that often changed everything.

The next day was Monday, the first day of classes. At six p.m. that evening, I showed up at the student center ballroom to get my schedule for the night. I opened up the slip of paper. I only had one chapter left: Amethyst.

By the time I went to their Pref party, it was dark outside. A girl who had rushed me the previous day met me at the door and led me back to their tent, which was decorated beautifully with thousands of twinkling fairy lights. We started out talking about superficial things: how pretty the decorations were, how our first day of classes went, and so on. But then the conversation turned more serious. We talked about what sisterhood really meant. I watched Amethyst’s beautiful ritual, and afterwards when I sat back down with my rusher, I couldn’t help but start crying.

I was crying for the chapters that had cut me that I still hadn’t let go of, I was crying for the beauty of Amethyst and the sweet, talented, gorgeous girl who was sitting across from me telling me she wanted to be my sister, I was crying for how I had allowed myself to take a negative, superficial attitude towards recruitment… I was so unsure of what to do.

Here I was, knowing that Amethyst wanted ME. Out of seven chapters, this was the one that wanted me to be their sister. They saw something special in me. I saw something special in them, too, but I just wasn’t sure if I could TRULY see myself in this house. I think my rusher might have sensed my uncertainty. She asked if I had a difficult decision to make tonight, and I told her that this was my only Pref party, but I just had a lot to think about.

That night, back in the student center, I spent a lot of time deliberating whether I should sign my Pref card or not. Just when I was about to tell my Pi Chi I didn’t want to sign it and withdraw from recruitment, I decided that I would sign it. So I wrote down Amethyst’s name on the card and turned it in. I immediately regretted my decision when I got back to my dorm, but I decided to sleep on it.

When I woke up the next morning, I felt the same. I knew that I just couldn’t see myself opening my bid card later that day and running to Amethyst’s house and becoming a part of their sisterhood. I felt terrible because I had already signed my Pref card, but I texted my Pi Chi and told her how I felt. She asked if I was sure that I didn’t want to at least come open my bid and go to Bid Day to try things out, but for some reason I just felt really firm in my decision. She told me it was okay if I withdrew from recruitment, and so I did.

I’m still not quite sure why I made that decision, knowing that I was giving up my chance to be in a sorority freshman year, but I did. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had accepted my bid with Amethyst. But in hindsight, it’s easy to see why things happen the way that they do... But I will save that story for the next installment of my recruitment experience.

~

To be continued…

[sigmagirl2000]

good read, thanks!

[AOIILisa]

Great story so far, can't wait to see where you end up!

[peachgirl]

Thanks for the positive feedback everyone! Here is part three of four...

~

So my sophomore year of college began this fall, and I decided to rush again. Throughout freshman year, I had made friends with girls in almost every sorority on campus; in fact my closest friends were Aquamarines. I had seen how EVERY sorority was filled with amazing women, and that most people (at least, the people I wanted to be around) did not care about the "rankings" or stereotypes of the sororities. I was going into recruitment with a MUCH better outlook, because I knew I would be lucky to be a part of any sisterhood on my campus.

Going through recruitment a second time was a little less scary this time around, since I knew what to expect now. Of course, I was still EXTREMELY nervous, and I knew that nothing was guaranteed for me just because I was friends with some girls in certain houses. However, what I think I had going for me this year was not caring so much about superficial things like my clothes, hair, and nails (I mean, I still looked put-together, I just knew that how I looked wasn't the biggest factor) and instead focusing on having great conversations with the girls, being genuine, and making connections.

Day one started off visiting all seven houses. I'll summarize my experience at each one.

EMERALD: I don't remember much about this party since it was my first one of the day, but none of the conversations really stood out to me.

AQUAMARINE: Loved, loved, loved the girl I talked to here. It turned out we had a bunch in common, and she was friends with one of my good friends in this house. Talking to her felt like I was talking to an old friend, and we had plenty to talk about for the whole party.

PEARL: I really wanted to like this house. I felt like I SHOULD like it. It's a favorite for most PNMs, and my best friend is a Pearl at another school. But I was extremely disappointed. This was another house where we only talked to one girl the whole time, and I know I can't judge a whole house off one girl, but it was just a painful conversation. She seemed pretty disinterested, and when I asked how she was involved in the house, she told me, "I'm not really involved, I didn't actually do that much freshman year."

AMETHYST: This was a weird experience. I knew it would be a little awkward because of last year, and one of the girls I talked to even made reference to last year, so I knew they remembered me. I had polite conversations with everyone I talked to, but I knew the whole situation was awkward.

RUBY: I was blown away at this house. The so-called "bottom" house I had written off the year before. I was rushed by two really great girls, and our conversation felt totally natural, like I was just talking to friends in a casual setting. I was super impressed by Ruby.

TOPAZ: I had a so-so time here, but I wasn't really connecting that well with my rusher, and the conversation felt superficial.

DIAMOND: Loved this house a lot. My rusher was a sophomore, and when she found out I was too, she said, "Oh thank God, we can skip all that boring freshman intro stuff." We had a great conversation about traveling and the study abroad program we both wanted to do, and bonded over the fact that we both lived in what's considered to be the worst sophomore apartments on campus.

By the time they day was over, I was exhausted but felt pretty happy. Again, like last year, we put down the six houses we would like to return to the next day. The house I "dropped" was Amethyst, because I knew it was unlikely they would invite me back.

I was super nervous the next morning before opening my schedule. I closed my eyes as I opened it. When I looked down, I was elated. I had five houses! Diamond, Aquamarine, Ruby, Topaz, and Emerald had all called me back. Pearl and Amethyst hadn't, but I didn't care at all because I was so happy with the ones that did.

I'll summarize all my day two (Philanthropy) parties.

DIAMOND: The girl I was paired with here was, incredibly, a girl from my Pi Chi group the previous year, who I had remained friends with. It was nice talking to someone I knew, but then for the second half of the party, I was put with a different rusher and two other PNMs, which was a situation I hadn't encountered before and didn't really like.

AQUAMARINE: By far my favorite house I went to. I got to talk to another girl who I had lots of mutual friends with, which just took so much of the pressure off. Aquamarine has a philanthropy I just LOVE and was super involved with in high school, so I got a chance to share that.

RUBY: Another great day at this house. My conversations weren't quite as amazing as the day before, but I still really liked this house and knew I wanted to be back the next day.

TOPAZ: Okay, so I know I mentioned I wasn't super enthusiastic about their philanthropy before, and I guess I should clarify that what I mean is: I definitely support their cause, just not the charity they are partnered with due to the charity's stance and how they use their funds. It's a real sticking point for me, but obviously I wouldn't say anything like that out loud during my rush party. It didn't help that the girl rushing me didn't seem to want to talk at all while we were making our craft, and wouldn't look AT me when she was talking to me. So I left this party with a mediocre feeling.

EMERALD: I had a good time here, but like the day before, nothing stood out to me too much. One thing I disliked was that one girl I talked to belittled Aquamarine's philanthropy (which is something I've always been very involved with) while talking up Emerald's. I don't think she meant it to be spiteful, but it still bothered me. Another thing she said was how great Emerald looks on her resume. I got the feel from these girls that their sorority was just one of many activities for them, and while I admire them for being super involved and leaders on campus, I'm not exactly that type of person.

At the end of this day, we put down which four houses we would like to visit the next day. The house I "dropped" was Topaz, due to the reasons I mentioned above.

I'll stop here in the story. At this point, I was feeling so much better than I had last year, even though I was still super nervous. I loved most of the houses I had visited, but I was scared because I knew that a lot could change before Skit Day tomorrow...

~

To be continued...

[Sciencewoman]

Looking forward to reading about the next round!

[LIXO]

I'm enjoying your story

[DZ_Turtle86]

I also went through rush (because it wasn't recruitment then) as a sophomore. There were only a small number of NPC sororities on my campus at the time, and I "knew" which one I wanted to join. I was crushed and called home crying when I was dropped. Of course, I ended up where I belonged and to this day, my pledge class sisters are my family...even though almost all of them are a year younger than me

I wish I would have taken notes like these so that I could go back and read my thoughts and emotions of that week, and even the fun things like the schedule, party themes, and first impressions.

[DZ_Turtle86]

I also went through rush (because it wasn't recruitment then) as a sophomore. There were only a small number of NPC sororities on my campus at the time, and I "knew" which one I wanted to join. I was crushed and called home crying when I was dropped. Of course, I ended up where I belonged and to this day, my pledge class sisters are my family...even though almost all of them are a year younger than me

I wish I would have taken notes like these so that I could go back and read my thoughts and emotions of that week, and even the fun things like the schedule, party themes, and first impressions.

[AOIILisa]

I hope the OP comes back to finish this!

[UWyoKD]

Yes, me too! I am really enjoying her story and am looking forward to the conclusion!

[DaffyKD]

There is only one part left. Hopefully she will post it soon. I would love to hear the end of her story.

DaffyKD

[ChioLu]

peachgirl -- please finish. Can't wait to hear the ending!

[AZTheta]

*yawn* she's logged on at least twice since her last post, but no update/finishing. Guess she wants us to clamor or beg or something of the sort, yet she's had close to 2000 views which tells you that people ARE interested, if she's in for the attention factor.

Honestly, how many times have we seen this? I'm slightly disappointed (a very little, mind you), because she started out gangbusters with a well written narrative; but now, I'm mostly very annoyed.