Cold Approaches

excelblue · #1 09-30-2011, 03:18 AM

So, after three years of existence, my chapter has only had events with exactly one sorority. It appears that we just aren't very well connected with the other Greek organizations on campus. However, we'd like to expand our social horizons.

Apparently, only knowing ten ladies in other sororities, I'm actually the most connected guy (to Greek women) in my chapter, so I've naturally gotten the task of pushing things forward in that aspect.

Out of those ten, I'm very good friends with two of them. However, I'm only very loosely acquainted with a couple others in their respective chapters, and nobody in my chapter knows anyone from their chapters. Though, it's better than nothing, so I figured that's a good place to start.

For all practical purposes, it seems like my chapter will have to do a cold approach / formal introduction to get something set up. Do you guys have any ideas or tips, or any advice on how that works?

Oneperson · #2 09-30-2011, 09:52 AM

Why do you think you have to already know the members of a sorority to have a swap? Pick up the phone and start calling. At the very least, introduce yourself, find out who their social chairman is. Make an appointment to go meet that person. Or just go ahead and ask on the phone. If they're booked up this semester, plan one for next semester.

Be bold. What have you got to lose?

DeltaBetaBaby · #3 09-30-2011, 10:56 AM

I don't know what tradition is on your campus, but how do other groups arrange these things?

One thing you could do, that is relatively simple/low cost is to get a few guys to put on shirts and ties, and take the women cookies or something at dinner.

thetalady · #4 09-30-2011, 12:45 PM

Start with a little "foreplay" with a couple of specific sororities, not the entire Panhellenic community.

Send them flowers to congratulate them on their new pledge class. Learn to serenade and go sing to them at dinner one night as your "introduction" to the girls. Taking cookies is also a great idea... all sorority girls love cookies! Then call & chat with the social chair.

Instead of a swap, maybe invite them to cooperate in an easy, afternoon service project? Less pressure than a swap, but still allows some social interaction between the groups. Think more creatively than just a swap...

excelblue · #5 10-01-2011, 01:48 AM

Hmm, a joint service project sounds like a great idea.

In terms of serenades: do they still work? Most people in my chapter thinks that it'll just make us look stupid, though I personally disagree. I may be wrong though...

victoriana · #6 10-01-2011, 02:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by excelblue

Hmm, a joint service project sounds like a great idea.

In terms of serenades: do they still work? Most people in my chapter thinks that it'll just make us look stupid, though I personally disagree. I may be wrong though...

Some of the fraternities do it here. I personally think it's really sweet and a nice gesture. It only looks stupid if you don't know your songs or you don't have a good turn out.

DeltaBetaBaby · #7 10-01-2011, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thetalady

Instead of a swap, maybe invite them to cooperate in an easy, afternoon service project? Less pressure than a swap, but still allows some social interaction between the groups. Think more creatively than just a swap...

Who traditionally pays for swaps on your campus? If it's usually split evenly between the men and the women, you could offer to pay more than half as an additional lure (but only do this if the women are generally interested, and it's more of a final selling point).

33girl · #8 10-01-2011, 09:43 AM

Serenades (as they've been spoken about on here) were unheard of on my campus. However, I'm sure any sorority would have been completely bowled over if a fraternity had done one for them.

FACT: Girls cannot resist guys singing to them, even if they don't sound like Marvin Gaye.

victoriana · #9 10-01-2011, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

Serenades (as they've been spoken about on here) were unheard of on my campus. However, I'm sure any sorority would have been completely bowled over if a fraternity had done one for them.

FACT: Girls cannot resist guys singing to them, even if they don't sound like Marvin Gaye.

So true! I love when we get serenaded. It makes the guys seem that much more nice.

AlphaFrog · #10 10-01-2011, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

FACT: Girls cannot resist guys singing to them, even if they don't sound like Marvin Gaye.

Yes! Yes! Yes! It also shows that you are willing to put yourselves out there. It's not easy to sing in front of others. Also, you really only need one or two that can sing, and everyone else can hum along. Reference: The second part, not the lip syncing. By the way, who is the "extra" that standing next to Jessi? He looks familiar from something else.

ETA: Nevermind, it's Scott Wolf. I feel like a failure as a late 80s/early 90s child for not getting that faster.

psusue · #11 10-01-2011, 02:30 PM

Serenades totally work. Last semester we had a fraternity come to the end of chapter meeting, sing to us, and give our president flowers to ask us to be their Greek Sing partners. Guess who we chose?

Old_Row · #12 10-01-2011, 04:15 PM

Yes! Serenades totally work especially if they aren't done so frequently at your school and you make sure to work in the sorority name into the lyrics. You really don't have to be good just dress up and be sincere. It also helps if you have a brother that plays a little guitar to help the singing impaired. There are lots of examples on youtube if you search for fraternity serenade for ideas. I think one like this one is very charming - - - - > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKbw_...eature=related

Leslie Anne · #13 10-01-2011, 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Old_Row

I think one like this one is very charming - - - - > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKbw_...eature=related

^^^ That's a real cute one.

Serenades are awesome and women absolutely love them. Even if they don't immediately get you paired up for an event like Greekweek, they make a great impression and can completely change the way your fraternity is perceived.

als463 · #14 10-01-2011, 08:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by psusue

Serenades totally work. Last semester we had a fraternity come to the end of chapter meeting, sing to us, and give our president flowers to ask us to be their Greek Sing partners. Guess who we chose?

I love that, psusue! You saying this brings back GREAT memories. Thanks! For homecoming, one year, Theta Chi came to our suite and serenaded us with our sorority flower (rose-colored carnations), some chocolate chip cookie cake thing, and a banner that said Theta Chi and Phi Mu Homecoming. It was so incredibly sweet and it gave me such a positive impression of that group of guys! Yes, it made my sorority experience more memorable. I say the OP should do it!

*Bonus points if you present the chapter with their sorority flower!

Evan0g · #15 10-02-2011, 05:12 PM

I totally know the feeling. We are a smallish chapter without a house so we sometimes get overlooked by sororities. This is what we did (This is a few year process so you must follow through and keep it going!):
First: Try to get exchanges with as many sororities as possible. Show them a good time and try to make it memorable. For your first exchanges, there won't be a whole lot of girls coming out, but it's a start.
Second: Attend as many Greek events as possible so you establish a presence. You'll meet girls at these events and now you have a way in.
Third: Participate in as many sorority philanthropy events, even if you can muster only the bare minimum, it's a start and they'll appreciate it. For one event, a few of us just cheered random girls we've never met on. It works, they love it, and it's a way to introduce yourselves.
Fourth: EVERY BROTHER/PLEDGE MUST DO THIS! If you ever see a girl wearing letters in class, introduce yourself! First, you've made a connection, and second, you now have a study buddy. It's a total win-win. I met some of my closest sorority friends just by introducing myself in class and studying with them. When you do this, try to keep the relationship as plutonic as possible at first. If the girl thinks you're hitting on her, it just looks creepy and it'll give you guys a bad rep.
Fifth: Keep in contact with the girls. If you just introduce and dash, you haven't grounded the connection. Either talk to them on FB or just comment on their status and such so maintain the connection.

Following these steps will not only allow you to meet girls, but it will also give you an amazing Greek experience. Most of my best memories are at Greek events and Sorority Philanthropy Events. I've done random things like doing the "Tootsie-Roll" on the sidelines, to competeting in a Male Beauty Pagent. Both of them highly embarassing, but I had a kickass time doing them and I've never regretted it.