Our sorority gets no frat love...

pledge · #1 10-03-2002, 07:14 AM

We are suppose to have mixers at our school with other frats, regardless of whether they like us or not. The guys are nice, but they are stand offish towards some of us b/c we aren't skinny blondes like most of the girls in DZ or Phi Mu. It sucks!! I have seen that the frats seem to favor the other sororities over us, they think that the others are prettier than us, but they always tell us that we are not stuck up and fun to hang with. I guess that's better than nothing. I think that my sorority are pretty darn hot. I just wanted to vent!!!!

aedea42 · #2 10-03-2002, 07:41 AM

that's kinda the same image we have here... but I don't let it bother me because I love my sisters... I know that if I had joined one of the popular sororities I never would have found the love support and acceptance that I did with this group of girls... we may not be the "pretty" sorority... but I'm still very proud to be a part of this group... because I know in the end that other girls looks will fade but we have other qualities that make us beautiful and those will never fade...

doesn't that sound like a hallmark card!!! :-)

teke4life · #3 10-03-2002, 08:41 AM

you can start by not calling them "frats".

KappaKittyCat · #4 10-03-2002, 08:51 AM

Woah, buddy. Go easy on her here. She's kinda new, and I'm sure she didn't mean any disrespect.

Pledge, I'd suggest that y'all just be persistent in asking them to do things with you. Take the initiative and offer to do more of the planning. That's the only way that my chapter got fraternities to start hanging out with us. We took all the initiative and did all the planning last year, and this year several fraternities have contacted us to do stuff.

pledge · #5 10-03-2002, 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by teke4life
you can start by not calling them "frats".

Yeah, take it easy. Around here, "Frat" is just short for "Fraternity", it's not something taboo to say, write, or type.

I'm in a group of girls that are cool, some her prettier than the others, but together, we all look good!! I just wish that guys could see that what makes us different, makes us beautiful.

CarolinaDG · #6 10-03-2002, 09:49 AM

Ok, I'm gonna tell you a few stories about my sorority...

Here, we're not exactly known as "the best"... BUT, here are a few things that I've heard fraternities say... I've heard Pi Kapps say that we were the most fun sorority to do homecoming with, DU's this year have said the same thing. A Sigma Nu said that we were great girls, we just needed to get our name out more. Sig Eps asked us to mix with them (and they're one of the best fraternities on campus). We're known as the "fun" girls. Out of the fraternities that I've listed, Sigma Nu is the only one that one of our girls isn't dating one of the guys in.

My point is, being known as the "fun" girls really is a very good thing. We aren't required to mix with every fraternity. A lot of the fraternities on this campus only mix with four sororities. Sometimes 6. There are 9 on campus. And it really is horrible sometimes, because I know that if they mixed with us, they'd fall in love with us. All the other fraternities that do go to parties with us have.

I think your greek life is wonderful for making y'all mix. You've been given a great opportunity there. So just take advantage of it. If they think of you as fun and laid back, then have that reputation. Be fun and laid back. It's DEFINITELY not a bad reputation to have.

Oh, and look around... even the sororities that are stereotypical blonde and perfect aren't all that way. And even the sororites that aren't the stereotypical blonde and perfect may have a girl or two that are blonde and perfect.

MoxieGrrl · #7 10-03-2002, 09:57 AM

pledge, my sorority went through the same thing of not being known as the "hot" girls. And much like CarolinaDG's sorority, we became known as the "fun" group of girls. We always came up with great mixer ideas, and presented it to them in a cool way. If the guys didn't bite, well, their loss! The groups that did have parties with us always had a good time and word eventually got around!

And besides, my boyfriend told me that his fraternity didn't like to mix with the hot girl sorority. He said it was like a junior high mixer (boys on one side, girls on the other) because the girls didn't want to make their boyfriends' mad!! And they left early to be with their boyfriends too. So, sometimes, the "hot sorority" parties aren't always the most fun.

pledge · #8 10-03-2002, 09:59 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by CarolinaDG
Ok, I'm gonna tell you a few stories about my sorority...

Here, we're not exactly known as "the best"... BUT, here are a few things that I've heard fraternities say... I've heard Pi Kapps say that we were the most fun sorority to do homecoming with, DU's this year have said the same thing. A Sigma Nu said that we were great girls, we just needed to get our name out more. Sig Eps asked us to mix with them (and they're one of the best fraternities on campus). We're known as the "fun" girls. Out of the fraternities that I've listed, Sigma Nu is the only one that one of our girls isn't dating one of the guys in.

My point is, being known as the "fun" girls really is a very good thing. We aren't required to mix with every fraternity. A lot of the fraternities on this campus only mix with four sororities. Sometimes 6. There are 9 on campus. And it really is horrible sometimes, because I know that if they mixed with us, they'd fall in love with us. All the other fraternities that do go to parties with us have.

I think your greek life is wonderful for making y'all mix. You've been given a great opportunity there. So just take advantage of it. If they think of you as fun and laid back, then have that reputation. Be fun and laid back. It's DEFINITELY not a bad reputation to have.

Oh, and look around... even the sororities that are stereotypical blonde and perfect aren't all that way. And even the sororites that aren't the stereotypical blonde and perfect may have a girl or two that are blonde and perfect.

Thanks!! That is really great advice. My sorority has a lot of fun at the mixers!!! Last week we had a great mixer with TKE and at first they were kind of standing back, but then, they just started to get crazy with us, and they weren't even drunk!!! So, you are definitely right, being the fun sorority is a great rep to have!!!

breathesgelatin · #9 10-03-2002, 10:10 AM

i totally sympathesize, pledge! we are in the same position on campus but we are working on it. we are going to try to start off by doing a date function with another sorority, which is a little less intimidating but lets other GLOs know that we like to be social!

DeltaSigStan · #10 10-03-2002, 10:17 AM

Don't feel that bad. SInce we're the smallest house (and the Animal House), NONE of the sororities here hang out with us. Everytime they do walkarounds, they never come to our house. I remembered a couple Pi Phis laughing at me when I invited them to one of our parties. And our Gamma Phi coaches never showed up at our house for their Philantrophy. And like 20 Gamma Phis ran into KA, took a wrong turn and ended up just inside our courtyard, realized where they were, and turned the other way.

It doesn't matter, we get enough random girls at our parties so it's all good.

Kevin · #11 10-03-2002, 11:02 AM

I can relate! My fraternity had the same issue until we discovered that if we invite them, they will come!

Your social calendar doesn't build itself. It takes time, effort (and of course money). We've scheduled a mixer with each sorority on campus, we've got brothers and candidates working as "house boys" (serving meals) to some houses...

With a little effort you can get wherever you want your group to go.

Kevlar281 · #12 10-03-2002, 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ktsnake
Your social calendar doesn't build itself.

I think that quote sums up this entire thread.

HotDamnImAPhiMu · #13 10-03-2002, 11:28 AM

Pledge -- you sound SO BITTER. I probably wouldn't hang out with you because of that alone -- you could look like the hottest thing on two legs, but if you're not fun to be with, you're not fun to be with.

Sisterhood isn't about getting drunk with frats and who pays you the most attention.

You need to change your focus. You sound like so many girls who complain, "Nooooo guys liiiiiiiike meeeee......" and never step back for half a minute to consider -- why should they? Do I try and have fun no matter where I am? Am I encouraging, fun to be with, energetic, optimistic? Or do I spend most of my time complaining?

AchtungBaby80 · #14 10-03-2002, 11:31 AM

ktsnake is right. Just invite fraternities to get together with you all, and I'm sure they'll be returning the invitations. A sorority doesn't have to be all "blonde and perfect"--hey, can't brunettes be perfect, too?--to get a lot of attention from fraternities. The fraternities probably just think you all aren't interested in doing mixers with them, so you have to show them that you are.

Kevin · #15 10-03-2002, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by HotDamnImAPhiMu
Pledge -- you sound SO BITTER. I probably wouldn't hang out with you because of that alone -- you could look like the hottest thing on two legs, but if you're not fun to be with, you're not fun to be with.

Pledge, I'm also getting a kind of negative image of you.... Every time you post something it's got to be a negative aspect of your new member period. If you're not enjoying this stuff maybe it's not for you.

It might help you if you made a conscious decision that from here on out you would enjoy yourself and have a more positive outlook on things. If something's bothering you, rather than complain, see what you can do to fix it.