Things you want to say (but shouldn't) outloud at work

[whiteandblack]

these posts are hilarious.

[AGDee]

You all are teaching me to NOT be nice. So much for Service Excellence. When I offer to do something nice, don't end up kicking me for it and creating hours of work for me.

Don't keep putting me on the spot by making me the middle man who has to fix everything that you all screw up. It doesn't make it ok just because you make a point to tell my boss that you appreciate that I went above and beyond the call of duty for you. I'm still ticked off that you put me in that position.

I'd be job hunting if I didn't have 6 weeks of time off a year after 13 years in this system. Yeah, I'm now only here for the time off. It's sad, because until the past year, I loved this job.

[poetry in motio]

JUST SHUT THE HELL UP !

[mulattogyrl]

If you don't stop checking your messages on speakerphone I'm gonna throw that isht out the window.

[aggieAXO]

Why are we treating a puppy for free and giving him back to the original owners when they cannot take care of it?? I don't have a problem treating the puppy but it should find a new home. Are we going to spay it for free and then treat for heartworms when it gets them b/c the people had no money to buy prevention. Sometimes I don't understand where you are coming from and I don't think you look at the big picture. BTW, the rest of your employees are pissed b/c you are doing all this for free when the rest of us have to pay our bills when our animals are sick. So you are ok with giving away services to complete strangers off the streets but not for us who have worked for you for many years-does this make since. WTF?

[BetteDavisEyes]

Just b/c you're thin does not make you beautiful.
Your face is too long, your breasts are non-existant, your ass is a piece of plywood with a crack in it, and you are just as ugly on the outside as you are on the inside.
Get bent.
P.S. As a teacher, you suck ass & I'd never wish you on anyone's children.

[APhi Sailorgirl]

I hate you all and I have no freaking idea how you all got the jobs you did, b/c you appear to have trouble getting dressed and tying your shoes each day.

[AGDee]

The longer I work here, the less money I make because the raises don't cover the increase costs for benefits. I won't be able to continue working here at this rate. I need a promotion.

[OrchidAlum]

Why the heck don't we have an emergency generator? And why don't the damn stairs go down to the parking lot?!?!?!

(the power went off in my office building about an hour ago... and it's still not back on)

[AlphaFrog]

I see your mouth moving, and I'm pretty sure there are words coming out, but all I'm getting is "blah, blah, blah".

[AGDee]

I have to eat crow now. My boss gave me an "out of sequence" raise for increased job responsibilities because he recognized how much I've been doing over the last year. These are practically unheard of in our building so I'm really shocked and thrilled that management thinks enough of me to do that for me. So, I take back all those previous posts.

[AOX81]

Could you be any more of tightwad?

Quit being a seagull manager! When you come into the office all you do it shit all over us and then leave!

[Phimuteach]

I'm sorry, But I don't think "I'm lucky" to get sent home and paid for a half day of work when I signed up for a full day. I have rent to pay and student loans out my rear. I'd rather do the work and get paid for the whole day LIKE I EXPECTED.

[AlphaFrog]

Now why is it that I'm doing your work that you "don't have time to do", yet you have time to stand around and watch me do your work??

***BULL*^%#***

[AOX81]

"Mr. ****, what you just said is one of the most insanely, idiotic things that I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that can be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul."