the right to choose - Page 5

Lady Pi Phi · #61 12-18-2002, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Optimist Prime

Hey... What is the real reason to join a sorority? Sisterhood, right? Go where you fit in.

Exactly! There has been some great advice Smiley given to you. Research both the NPC and NPHC chapters and their national organizations, and see which you might fit best. Go through rush because you'll never know unless you try.
I went to my sorority's info night with the pre-conceived notion that I would never be a part of it because I assumed that sororities were all full of blond, leggy, skinny, tall girls. My sorority and chapter is not like that at all. My chapter has girls of all shapes, sizes, and ethinic backgrounds, and I am so glad that I went because I would never have found the wonderful sisters I have today. So check everyone out and find the group that's right for you. Good luck!

texas*princess · #62 12-18-2002, 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AXO Alum
I will say this - if you are made to feel uncomfortable at a house during recruitment or other introduction type event because of the color of your skin, then you will know that there is a BETTER place for you outside of those four walls.

I highly agree with what AXOAlum has wrote here! The sisters at each house - regardless if it is NPC, NPHC, or whatever, should want you for YOU and you should feel the same about them!

smr78 · #63 12-18-2002, 09:22 PM

One of my best friends is black, and when we were going through rush she didnt even really consider the black sororities on campus. She joined a house where there is I believe one other black girl-but she loves it. Just choose a house based on the people in it and you will be happy! Don't worry!!!!!

AlphaXiDiva · #64 12-19-2002, 07:13 AM

I just wanted to say thanks to all the black women who popped in to give their opinions on being part of NPC orgs for smiley. It's not always obvious who is what in who, and I think it's cool that you all are speaking up for her. I just feel it's a perspective that is good for her (as well as myself) to hear...I have wondered if I was on a campus with nationals, which way I would have gone...I always said it depends on the campus and the chapters, but I never really considered what was said earlier about not being accepted by another chapter of the same letters. As today is still a racially tense time...ahhh... someday
that's all!
greek love!

ps- it is kind of painful to hear/read posts that say "well, there are orgs on my campus that have a few minorities", or "i have a black sister, or two and I love THEM, THEY..."...it's appreciated info, but at the same time it's kind of shallow...one or two out of how many??? And why are they THEY... but, and I deeply stress: ITS GOT TO START SOMEWHERE (integration that is) and I am truly glad to hear it is some places!!! It'll be nice when it's all about an org and not THEM rushing US, or WE don't look at THEM any particular way

smiley21 · #65 12-19-2002, 02:38 PM

that is a good point. i am not looking for sororities to brag or whatever saying hey 'i have a black sister' or 'hey we have multiracial people'. that is not what i want. i just want to be comfortable.

White_Chocolate · #66 12-19-2002, 03:03 PM

yeah, you don't want them to brag. . .

HOWEVER, you don't want to lose your uniqueness either.

example:
one day, two of my sisters were decorating our door and they were doing the 'some create trends, others create legends' and they did different actresses that are legends like marilyn, lucille ball, judy garland, etc. i came down and was looking at the door and there's wasn't one single black or minority on it. and when i questioned why they didn't do one. . .they made the statement that they didn't know any besides, they didn't look at me'like that'. and i was like, 'hello, i'm black. there's nothing that can take that away from me. that's what makes me unique. yeah, i have a white boyfriend. yeah, i'm in an all-white sorority. but i'm still black and i always will be.'

later they said that they were so upset because they didn't think of me as an individual but as one of them(which kind of made me feel good but still, i'm not white and i can't pretend that i am). however, i wanted them to appreciate the black actresses and singers as well.

sometimes, you just have to remind them.

'We ain't going nowhere. . .we can't be stopped now. . .we're Phi Sigs for life. . .'

astroAPhi · #67 12-19-2002, 03:05 PM

AlphaXiDiva, I think a lot of the reason why some of our chapters don't have more women of different races is because minorities sometimes don't go to college. It's unfortunate because sometimes they aren't given the same opportunities as caucasians. I'm from the suburbs of Chicago, and most of the kids around here go to college. Unfortunately when you travel into the city, most of the schools are full of poor black kids who can't afford tuition to a university, or their teachers have unfortunately taught them not to count on anything. The lucky ones get athletic scholarships because a lot of the Chicago schools have extremely strong basketball programs. It just plain sucks and those kids never break the cycle.

At my school, we have a very strong international population (25%), but when I think about it, not too many kids from the States are minorities at my school. Most of the ones that are are from the area and are on sports scholarships. Most of the international students join Caribbean Students Association instead of joining a fraternity and a sorority. My sorority teamed up with the CSA girls for a flag football team this fall, and those girls rocked. I'm hoping that they'll think about rushing because we all had a lot of fun and maybe it would break those stereotypes. I don't think of them as black girls, I think of them as awesome chicks who I'd like to hang out with more. One of them might be joining the soccer team and I'm excited that we'll get to play together.

I hope that we haven't struck you as shallow AlphaXiDiva. I don't even think of the girls in my chapter who are "minorities" as that. Leslie from Honduras is just a wacky girl who cracks me up all the time, and Annie from Pakistan is just a bubbly girl who likes to talk a lot. Only when I was trying to show smiley how diverse chapters can be did their nationalities come out. I think most of the other girls on here think of their sisters as the same way: not as "the black girl in my sorority" but as "Diana, my sister who likes to go with me to pick up guys", etc.

I hope that we haven't given anyone that impression. I don't want anyone to think I took my sisters simply because we wanted to say we were good people and take girls from different ethnic backgrounds. We took those girls because they kick ass and because we knew they'd make great Alpha Phis.

LatinaAlumna · #68 12-19-2002, 03:06 PM

Quote:

ps- it is kind of painful to hear/read posts that say "well, there are orgs on my campus that have a few minorities", or "i have a black sister, or two and I love THEM, THEY..."...it's appreciated info, but at the same time it's kind of shallow...one or two out of how many??? And why are they THEY... but, and I deeply stress: ITS GOT TO START SOMEWHERE (integration that is) and I am truly glad to hear it is some places!!! It'll be nice when it's all about an org and not THEM rushing US, or WE don't look at THEM any particular way

AlphaXiDiva: Thanks for mentioning this. This bothers me, too. By the way, one of my best friends went to Redlands and loved it! A great school!

Someone on this thread also mentioned "minorities who are brave enough to go through rush"...I don't think it's a matter of bravery (well, maybe it is in some places), but a matter of choice. Just because many of us chose not to go NPC doesn't mean we lacked courage...we just preferred other options.

LatinaAlumna · #69 12-19-2002, 03:25 PM

Quote:

I think a lot of the reason why some of our chapters don't have more women of different races is because minorities sometimes don't go to college.

Are you saying that "non-minorities" ALWAYS go to college?

Another question: So then, how do you explain a campus like the one I went to, with the majority of students being non-caucasian (because minorities sometimes DO go to college), but yet, some of the IFC/NPC houses on campus did not have more than 1-2 "minority" students out of 100+ active members? I don't think it was for lack of "minority" students on campus, or even lack of "minority" students in the rush process...because some houses were VERY diverse.

(I put the word minority in quotes because in some places, people of color are the majority.)

sigmadiva · #70 12-19-2002, 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by astroAPhi
AlphaXiDiva, I think a lot of the reason why some of our chapters don't have more women of different races is because minorities sometimes don't go to college. It's unfortunate because sometimes they aren't given the same opportunities as caucasians. I'm from the suburbs of Chicago, and most of the kids around here go to college. Unfortunately when you travel into the city, most of the schools are full of poor black kids who can't afford tuition to a university, or their teachers have unfortunately taught them not to count on anything. The lucky ones get athletic scholarships because a lot of the Chicago schools have extremely strong basketball programs. It just plain sucks and those kids never break the cycle.

What the H$LL?????? This statement is so narrow-minded, bigoted and idiotic I don't know where to begin!!!!!! I think that since you EXPECT to see poor Black kids not doing well, that is all you can see. OPEN YOUR EYES!!!! There are plenty of Black kids in the Chicago area and beyond that actually attend college, and not all of them are on athletic scholarships!!!! I attended Texas A&M on TWO ACADEMIC scholarships!!! And I'm Black!!! And I have no athletic ability what-so-ever. Have you even heard of the Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs) that are majority Black!!! There is one in Texas, Prarie View A&M, an HBCU, that actually offers minority scholarships to white people since they would be the minority of the University population!!!!!!

smiley21 · #71 12-19-2002, 04:20 PM

whoa people. chill. my whole reasoning behind this wasnt to get everyone all against each other over races.
and to say something like 'minorities dont always have college opportunities' or 'poor black kids.....' is so tired. no matter what race you are, you can do anything you put your mind to and have your heart in. this whole discussion has gotten way out of hand. its getting off of the subject. these statements are getting to be uncalled for. i have already been considering not joining a sorority all together. to me, this discussion board is a reflection of sorority and fraternity life. i dont need all this drama. i think my life would be easier without it.

LatinaAlumna · #72 12-19-2002, 04:27 PM

Smiley:

Don't be discouraged from joining a sorority by what you see on a message board. As you will see on GC, someone will post an original question that gets people talking about other related topics, and yes, it sometimes gets off the original subject. I personally just had a few questions on some particular comments that did not "add up" to me.

Don't be disuaded from searching for a sisterhood that is right for you. The good thing (and the challenging thing) is that you have so many options. Good luck!

DeltaSigStan · #73 12-19-2002, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by astroAPhi
AlphaXiDiva, I think a lot of the reason why some of our chapters don't have more women of different races is because minorities sometimes don't go to college. It's unfortunate because sometimes they aren't given the same opportunities as caucasians. I'm from the suburbs of Chicago, and most of the kids around here go to college. Unfortunately when you travel into the city, most of the schools are full of poor black kids who can't afford tuition to a university, or their teachers have unfortunately taught them not to count on anything. The lucky ones get athletic scholarships because a lot of the Chicago schools have extremely strong basketball programs. It just plain sucks and those kids never break the cycle.
.

There's a guy in my fraternity who was born and raised in Compton, and was a gang member. Now he has a 4.0 and is pre - med. And he does not have any type of scholarship.

If you look hard enough for the opportunity, it will be there and you'll find it.

Steeltrap · #74 12-19-2002, 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by smiley21
whoa people. chill. my whole reasoning behind this wasnt to get everyone all against each other over races.
and to say something like 'minorities dont always have college opportunities' or 'poor black kids.....' is so tired. no matter what race you are, you can do anything you put your mind to and have your heart in. this whole discussion has gotten way out of hand. its getting off of the subject. these statements are getting to be uncalled for. i have already been considering not joining a sorority all together. to me, this discussion board is a reflection of sorority and fraternity life. i dont need all this drama. i think my life would be easier without it.

Smiley,
Race is one of the hot-button topics on GC, as it is in life. That's why it's very important to do a search because questions such as you've posted have already been addressed many times. And you can see that sometimes, stuff gets rather tetchy around here.

33girl · #75 12-19-2002, 04:55 PM

smiley,

Please don't let anything discourage you if being Greek is something you want...I apologize on behalf of the board for a discussion that is supposed to be about you and your options turning into a discussion about race.