Opinions for big SEC school

[FSUZeta]

Originally Posted by hotpink&pearls

Thanks for all the advice!
Honestly, when it comes to shoes - I'm going to wear what goes with my dress, is comfortable and doesn't smell (if this means smelling my shoes, so be it). If they happen to be different each day, cool. If they're the same, that works too. I hope my charming personality, shining recs, wonderful dresses and brilliant good looks can stand on their own (no pun intended, and obviously there was some joking in there haha!).

Once again, thanks for the advice - I'll be posting my recruitment story once rush is over, for better or worse. Until then, I'm going to focus on this whole moving in thing .

good luck with that whole moving thing-when my daughter moved off to college, she took tons of shoes, purses and clothes-she attended a high school with a uniform requirement, so was more than ready to express herself wardrobe wise. flash forward to sophomore year-she had heavily edited her wardrobe and this time, left tons of shoes, purses and clothes at home!

looking forward to your recruitment story when it is all said and done. good luck!

[AXOrushadvisor]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

This is not so much directed at the OP, but a general observation.

Debbie Downer post alert:

There seems to be A WHOLE lot more discussion of very specific clothing advice this year. (ex: wear THIS top instead of the top you chose).

In previous years, we seemed to get more general "what to wear" questions like "skirt or shorts for philanthropy day?"

Clothing is important, but I just hope that all the PNMs who are focusing on their recruitment wardrobe are also making sure they're prepared in other areas as well.

I"ve seen "what to wear" threads from PNMs at SEC schools who admittedly have no recs.

Again, not saying that clothes are unimportant, but if you don't have recs, and you have not prepared yourself in other ways (resume, conversation skills), you might not end up havng anywhere to wear your super awesome Lily dress you picked out.

I couldn't agree with you more. At the end of the day if you have spent $500 on your recruitment outfit, but you are a stick in the mud or haven't done your homework; your clothing choices wont give you a free ride. On the other hand, I have seen first hand a gal going through recruitment not making good choices on clothing right out of the shoot and being release from the majority of Chapters on campus. We do dress checks for our active members looking for boobs, butts and items that don't look right. I don't think there is any thing wrong with showing a PNM a more suitable option AND you don't have to spend a bunch of money. Again, I just think clothing is part of the PNM's homework along with the things you stated above.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by AXOrushadvisor

I couldn't agree with you more. At the end of the day if you have spent $500 on your recruitment outfit, but you are a stick in the mud or haven't done your homework; your clothing choices wont give you a free ride. On the other hand, I have seen first hand a gal going through recruitment not making good choices on clothing right out of the shoot and being release from the majority of Chapters on campus. We do dress checks for our active members looking for boobs, butts and items that don't look right. I don't think there is any thing wrong with showing a PNM a more suitable option AND you don't have to spend a bunch of money. Again, I just think clothing is part of the PNM's homework along with the things you stated above.

Exactly.

Originally Posted by Loyally Kappa

I read this thread from start to finish. As far as sororities being "image-focused" ... call it "competitive" if you want ... we might as well advise PNMs to bring the receipts for their outfits. God forbid someone may have paid less than full price for an item.

Please, point out one person that has said price matters. Personally, I recommend Target, TJMaxx, and signing up for email newsletters at your favorite stores. I get almost all of my nice clothing on sale because I read those emails and therefore know when the sales are happening, and I do not own anything with an actual designer label. Not even a basic purse. It is extremely easy to dress nicely for less, and I've never had anyone wrinkle their nose at my clothing, even when visiting some of the snottiest groups of people in T-Town.

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I have to say it is funny to reduce the shoes sidebar to simplistically inconsequential frivolity when even the very nature of recruitment outfit discussions is considered simplistically inconsequential frivolity by some.

The entire recruitment process is "simplistically inconsequential frivolity". Some chapters meet 1000+ girls in a day and are expected to cut and keep based on those few minutes they saw them and the applications the PNM's sent in. That's somehow going to be a deep and thoughtful process? It's essentially an audition and the fact is that when so many people are being considered for so few spots it's unlikely they're going to be picked based solely on their character. It's going to be a combination of their resumes, how likable they are in parties, and their first impression. So yes, sometimes things like an outfit or a friendly smile or a bunch of connections matter. That's just reality. Some girls will get picked because they are good people, nice to be around, and will make good members. And some girls will get picked for FAR more shallow reasons. So what's with all the denial?

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Relax?

I mean it's just as easy for us to say "Shoes aren't the important thing. Damn."

And, "Whether it happens or not it's still shallow."

Ok? Then "relax" and stop jumping down my throat because I prefer to be realistic rather than idealistic. Again, the question isn't whether or not it's "right" or "shallow". It isn't right and it is shallow. That doesn't mean we should act like it doesn't happen.

Originally Posted by hotpink&pearls

Thanks for all the advice!
Honestly, when it comes to shoes - I'm going to wear what goes with my dress, is comfortable and doesn't smell (if this means smelling my shoes, so be it). If they happen to be different each day, cool. If they're the same, that works too. I hope my charming personality, shining recs, wonderful dresses and brilliant good looks can stand on their own (no pun intended, and obviously there was some joking in there haha!).

Once again, thanks for the advice - I'll be posting my recruitment story once rush is over, for better or worse. Until then, I'm going to focus on this whole moving in thing .

Please smell the shoes. It sounds ridiculous, but like I said I've had a PNM show up smelling like a fraternity house laundry room and she didn't even notice because she was so nervous. Also, if you have time go ahead and get your clothes washed/dry cleaned. If you don't just remember to look them over the night before to make sure there's no stains you missed or loose seams or something (I've also had PNM's have their dress rip. Thank god for safety pins.)
Here's my random advice:
-Ask questions. Do not worry about how many or how often. It's better to be informed and your Recruitment Counselors are there to help you.
-Bring a tote bag to put heels in when you wear them so you can wear flip flops between parties. Some other items to put in the tote: breath mints (no gum! people forget and walk into parties smacking it...not a good call), shine blotting sheets if you get a shiny face, a brush or comb, some powder if you wear it, a small mirror, deodorant if you're like me and you can't handle the heat outside, safety pins, and bobby pins if you use them. I also always have a hair rubberband just in case it gets so hot I can't stand the hair lying on my neck. If you wear make up get some that's waterproof, because it's hot outside. Sweat happens.
-Leave the perfume at home. It's just too tempting to overload it when everyone is afraid of smelling like they've been walking through 90 degree heat.
-Smile even when your cheeks start to hurt.
-Get plenty of sleep each night!
-Be yourself, because there's no point in wanting to join a house where you have to be someone else.
-Walk that line between bragging and building yourself up. Yeah, no one likes a Boasting Betty, but it's important they remember that you are awesome, and why.
-Remember it's supposed to be fun. If you're the kind of person that is good at rushing from one thing to the next and staying on the ball it'll be easy for you to have fun (and if you are one of those people, I'm jealous), but if you're one of us ADD people, it can get overwhelming. So if you're in our club, just breathe and make some friends so you can get overwhelmed together. Then it's not so bad, AND you'll have fun.

(Re: moving in...don't be me and take every item of clothing you own. The day you move out you'll want to hit yourself in the head very hard for bringing so much crap.)

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

The entire recruitment process is "simplistically inconsequential frivolity."

No, it isn't.

And WOW. You really thought of that.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

No, it isn't.

And WOW. You really thought of that.

Please read the rest of my post. 1000+ girls a day. I do not for a second believe each one is chosen on basis of character only. That's just not the case. For every woman that IS chosen solely because she is a good, happy person, there is another chosen solely because she is pretty or because of who she knows.

Again, I just don't understand the constant denial. Even in the work world, sometimes good people are passed over because another candidate has a flashier resume, even though the other candidate is a complete bitch. I mean jesus, all these kids were judged just to get into the college they're attending. Were they picked because they have great personalities? Probably not. They were reduced to GPA's and resumes. It's not all warm fuzzies and bffs and puppies and unicorns.

[DrPhil]

The sky will fall if you all don't fix your quotes. It's the end of the world as we know it.

[ellebud]

Do clothes "make' a recruitment successful or not? Yes, clothes can. My daughter saw girls who suddenly turned up on the day before Pref in Great Aunt Tillie's concept of a great dress. Why were these girls suddenly dropped by all the houses? They weren't "repping" themselves, or their future house well.

I can tell you that what is stylish is very much a sectional and university thing. NO ONE wears polos here...except guys, golfers, and young women who need to find a new look. And further, if what you are wearing is "wrong" (not tasteless) and you are not extended a bid because of that....The house wasn't for you because they cared so much about the facade.

Knowing about last year's rush my daughter has friends in many houses: All have different styles of dress with clothes that ranged from Neiman's to Forever 21, (gasp!) way different gpas and/or ecs, some were grade risks/some weren't...and at this VERY competitive rush you couldn't look strange, but you had to look good.

...and my daughter wouldn't know a Topsider, but she would know lace up high heels with red soles...that's just how different this is.

[agzg]

I like to think that the organization who helps a myriad of women achieve undergraduate and graduate degrees, that helps sisters in need, and raises money for Diabetes research in addtion to enriching the lives of its members, the organization that I dedicate my heart, soul, time, and financial resources to, is more than "just a sorority."

Yes, it may take a back seat to my education (although it was and remains such an important part of it) and my family (although a whole mess of sisters supported me both emotionally and physically when my mom died), but I like to think it's about more than fun times and good memories.

This makes my heart sad.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by agzg

I like to think that the organization who helps a myriad of women achieve undergraduate and graduate degrees, that helps sisters in need, and raises money for Diabetes research in addtion to enriching the lives of its members, the organization that I dedicate my heart, soul, time, and financial resources to, is more than "just a sorority."

Yes, it may take a back seat to my education (although it was and remains such an important part of it) and my family (although a whole mess of sisters supported me both emotionally and physically when my mom died), but I like to think it's about more than fun times and good memories.

This makes my heart sad.

So all members must have the same experience as a collegian/alum as you? Again, it is an individual experience. Please respect that. It's FINE for it to be what it is to you. To me it is always going to be behind my family, education, and career. There is nothing that will change that. I still pay dues, attend alum meetings and functions when I can, help with recruitment, and enjoy reunions. As I said, and I'll repeat it again, I never stated that it is nothing more than "fun times and good memories". Again, I stated that as a collegian I learned many things from being a member, and made many friends that I will (hopefully) always have. And again, I really enjoy the fact that thousands of women internationally share the same ritual I experience(d). I have a copy of the Purpose on my desk, because it's full of very admirable ideals and goals. It would be difficult to remain a member, pay alum dues, and show up to functions and reunions if I thought it was just "fun times and good memories". I'm sure that's true for just about every active alum. And again, I think it's important for new members to know that though many of us are very happy to be members of our organizations, it isn't the end of the world if they don't get a bid, or don't get one to their favorite house.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

So all members must have the same experience as a collegian/alum as you? Again, it is an individual experience. Please respect that. It's FINE for it to be what it is to you. To me it is always going to be behind my family, education, and career. There is nothing that will change that. I still pay dues, attend alum meetings and functions when I can, help with recruitment, and enjoy reunions. As I said, and I'll repeat it again, I never stated that it is nothing more than "fun times and good memories". Again, I stated that as a collegian I learned many things from being a member, and made many friends that I will (hopefully) always have. And again, I really enjoy the fact that thousands of women internationally share the same ritual I experience(d). I have a copy of the Purpose on my desk, because it's full of very admirable ideals and goals. It would be difficult to remain a member, pay alum dues, and show up to functions and reunions if I thought it was just "fun times and good memories". I'm sure that's true for just about every active alum. And again, I think it's important for new members to know that though many of us are very happy to be members of our organizations, it isn't the end of the world if they don't get a bid, or don't get one to their favorite house.

I'm not getting into a pissing match with you.

That said, it's more than "just a sorority" and it should be. At the beginning, of course it's not the end of the world if a PNM does not recieve a bid or one to her favorite house.

And to have MY experience trivialized that way is offensive, because to me (and so many other members of GC and alumnae groups) it is so so so much more than "just a sorority."

ETA: I've continued thinking about this post and others in this thread. Instead of telling everyone that THEY need to respect YOUR view when you're so disrespectful of thiers. I'm a firm believer that sorority membership (in ANY sorority, in ANY council, at ANY school, from ANY "tier") affords a woman multiple opportunities to shape her own life, and her own future, and that carries WELL past the collegiate experience. I'm not saying it has to be first, but the line is blurred time and time again if you want it to be and I still can't get over how offensive it is to read that my own sorority experience (and that of so many thousands of other women) has been boiled down to "silly" "frivalous" or "trivial."

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by agzg

I'm not getting into a pissing match with you.

That said, it's more than "just a sorority" and it should be. At the beginning, of course it's not the end of the world if a PNM does not recieve a bid or one to her favorite house.

And to have MY experience trivialized that way is offensive, because to me (and so many other members of GC and alumnae groups) it is so so so much more than "just a sorority."

ETA: I've continued thinking about this post and others in this thread. Instead of telling everyone that THEY need to respect YOUR view when you're so disrespectful of thiers. I'm a firm believer that sorority membership (in ANY sorority, in ANY council, at ANY school, from ANY "tier") affords a woman multiple opportunities to shape her own life, and her own future, and that carries WELL past the collegiate experience. I'm not saying it has to be first, but the line is blurred time and time again if you want it to be and I still can't get over how offensive it is to read that my own sorority experience (and that of so many thousands of other women) has been boiled down to "silly" "frivalous" or "trivial."

If I start counting how many times I've repeated myself I'll end up with a number like 543950849654903.

There is no pissing match because you are responding to something that was never written in the first place. You are responding to one line of one post, and ignoring all of the others both before it and after it. It is very obvious that the line "It's just a sorority" does not mean that it is "frivolous" or "trivial".

Please frame your posts as separate musings, because while your post is eloquent and heartfelt it is in no way a response to mine. I have never once said a sorority, or a person's experience in a sorority, life, earth, etc. is silly or frivolous. I have in fact, many, many times now, said that a sorority experience is personal and have explained what mine meant to me. I have asked that that be respected. I have also explained many, many times that it was certainly not silly and I have even carefully listed the several ways in which I believe it helped me and the things I learned from being a member. You, I and every other member of a GLO has an individual experience as a member and I very firmly believe that should be respected. We are all different people with different experiences and that is ok. Instead of focusing on one line of my posts, please read all of the words that precede it.

No one in this thread has said one time that an organization itself is either silly or frivolous, nor have they implied it. No one here has attacked you or your organization. And no one here has implied that GLO's are not important to members, or that they are not useful to both members and individuals that the organizations help. Not once has anyone's experience in an organization been called "silly", "frivolous", or "trivial".

[Loyally Kappa]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

If I start counting how many times I've repeated myself I'll end up with a number like 543950849654903.

There is no pissing match because you are responding to something that was never written in the first place. You are responding to one line of one post, and ignoring all of the others both before it and after it.

Can it, sistah. You "chose" to lift a single line from one of my posts and respond to it, so get over someone doing likewise to you.

Afterall, this is "just a chatroom" ... heheh!

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

If I start counting how many times I've repeated myself I'll end up with a number like 543950849654903.

There is no pissing match because you are responding to something that was never written in the first place. You are responding to one line of one post, and ignoring all of the others both before it and after it. It is very obvious that the line "It's just a sorority" does not mean that it is "frivolous" or "trivial".

Please frame your posts as separate musings, because while your post is eloquent and heartfelt it is in no way a response to mine. I have never once said a sorority, or a person's experience in a sorority, life, earth, etc. is silly or frivolous. I have in fact, many, many times now, said that a sorority experience is personal and have explained what mine meant to me. I have asked that that be respected. I have also explained many, many times that it was certainly not silly and I have even carefully listed the several ways in which I believe it helped me and the things I learned from being a member. You, I and every other member of a GLO has an individual experience as a member and I very firmly believe that should be respected. We are all different people with different experiences and that is ok. Instead of focusing on one line of my posts, please read all of the words that precede it.

No one in this thread has said one time that an organization itself is either silly or frivolous, nor have they implied it. No one here has attacked you or your organization. And no one here has implied that GLO's are not important to members, or that they are not useful to both members and individuals that the organizations help. Not once has anyone's experience in an organization been called "silly", "frivolous", or "trivial".

We can take this to PM if you like, I am not having this discussion with you for public viewing anymore.

[ellebud]

To clarify "strange"...eagle tattoos on a backless dress, black goth long sleeve velvet in summer (does show tenacity about style and excellent deodorant), and dressing in costume...although that has, evidently worked.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by ellebud

To clarify "strange"...eagle tattoos on a backless dress, black goth long sleeve velvet in summer (does show tenacity about style and excellent deodorant), and dressing in costume...although that has, evidently worked.

I would be tempted to find a way to instantly bid a girl that showed up in costume, because she has to be the most confident girl on the planet.