Alumna Initiation - Navane

[adduncan]

Navane, I know that story too well.

{{{HUGZ}}} for my fellow long-haul PNAM.

Adrienne

[Jill1228]

Oh hell to the naw! You know you are SICK AND WRONG for leaving us hanging!

[navane]

There I was sorting of hanging out not hearing from Saltimbanco when the President of the Dralion alumnae association decided to e-mail me to invite me to a Fall 2001 event! As one could imagine, I was sort of surpised; but hey, I thought it might be worth a go. The event was everything a lovely alum event should be. The ladies were really nice, and they seemed to like me! The hostess was excellent, the members welcoming, the activities both fun and heartwarming...even the nametages were adorable! One alumna even sat and talked with me for a long while about how much Dralion meant to her.

Well, at the end of that day, the President and the Membership Chair pulled me aside and asked me about my thoughts. I told them that I had a really nice time and that I was happy they had invited me around to meet everyone. The President then said that they would love to have me as a sister of Dralion and that, if it was alright by me, that she and the Membership Chair would like to sign off as my sponsors!

I was kind of suprised. Then again, the Membership Chair was one of the girls who had rushed me back in 1997 and she was really thrilled that I had shown up. Maybe they just figured that they knew me well enough already?? I mentioned something along the lines of that I was expecting to have to attend a few events first. The president responded by explaining that Dralion would be having a regional conference in less than two months’ time where the International President was going to be the guest speaker. They wanted me initiated before then so that they could “show me off as their newest member”. We ended the conversation with the President saying that she would get the appropriate forms to me so I could think about it. They also invited me to their next event which has a holiday party.

Not but five minutes later, the Vice President pulled me aside and asked me if I had been enjoying the event. I thanked her (she was the hostess) and said I had a good time. Then, this lady proceeded to tell me about how my alumnae initiation process would go. She explained that I would likely be invited around for a few more events so that we could all get to know each other more. If all was good then, we could see about possibly getting me a sponsor. I kinda just stood there for a couple seconds - obviously, she had no idea that I had just been invited for membership and gotten two sponsors just a few minutes earlier. Honestly, I was a little flustered and I didn’t know what to do. So, I sort of feigned stupid and mentioned that the President and Membership Chair had already spoken to me about membership and that they were getting some papers together for me to look at. Upon hearing this, the Vice President looked suprised and angry. She said she was going to have to discuss it with them and get back to me. It became obvious to me later that there was a bit of a divide in the group. The fact that some members were making decisions without consulting others didn’t help...and it was clear that I was at the center of a power struggle.

In the following days, memories of all of the negeative experiences I had with the collegiate chapter of Dralion came flooding back. I panicked. I thought, "I just can't do it - I can't send in my alumna application."

I called up the President and told her that I was withdrawing my interest. I explained a little bit to her about why I had decided that, and then she did something strange. She started agreeing with me and was like, "Yeah I don't like the sorority either, I've been thinking of quitting myself..." etc.

I still think Dralion is a wonderful organization. Since they were the ones to offer me my undergrad bid, I’ll always have a soft spot for them. But I simply cannot be a member.

[ms_gwyn]

navane,

this is like reading a very compeling novel that I can't put down or a cliff hanger at the end of the TV season

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!!!!!!

don't leave a sister hangin'

You definetly have had more drama than I did with my "pledge sorority"


I really truly hope that you find a home, mine has hit a tiny road bump, but I wont let that stop me.


ms gwyn

[navane]

Originally posted by ms_gwyn
navane,

this is like reading a very compeling novel that I can't put down or a cliff hanger at the end of the TV season

heh...and here y'all have been giving me a hard time about why I didn't re-tell the story! My story is like a bad soap opera! It's taking me forever to recount the whole thing!

.....Kelly

[navane]

Some weeks later, in January 2002, I was still wondering whatever happened with Saltimbanco as it had been a very, very long time since I had first contacted them.

After a few follow-up e-mails, the president of the original Saltimbanco collegiate chapter finally replied and was extra excited to hear about my interest. The chapter discussed it at a meeting and decided to invite me to be a special guest at their spring 2002 informal recruitment! I had a great time; the ladies were really cool. One of the sisters was actually near my age and she and I got on really well. I was first invited to a night out for ice skating and dinner. Then, I was invited back to another event at a coffeehouse.

On a side note, during the first event, I happened to run into a girl I went to high school with! She was two years behind me in school and we had been buddies in drama class. It turns out that she was participating in recruitment! She confided in me that she had her heart set on another chapter, but that Saltimbanco was a close second! Don’t worry, I didn’t pressure her to pick Saltimbanco. In case anyone cares, she did end up getting a bid from her first choice and went on to be a very active member!

Shortly thereafter, I was invited to a joint collegiate and alumnae event where we worked on a philanthropy project. That was really cool because, up until then, I had been talking with the collegiates and this was a good transition event. At the end of that event, the collegiate president and one of the alumnae association officers asked me to join them for lunch. They asked me about myself, talked about the benefits of being a lifelong member and we generally just had a laugh. They said that they would like to contact Saltimbanco's Regional Coordinator to ask about how to proceed. I was told one of them would contact me with more info. A couple months went by and I didn’t hear anything.

But there's a twist! I realized needed/wanted to get a Master of Education degree in Counselling. Just as I was moving along with Saltimbanco, I was offered a place to study at the University of Bristol in England! I thought that would end my journey to become an alum initiate right there. However, the collegiate president assured me that being in a sorority was for life and that one year wasn't going to make a difference.

Finally, six month’s after the first invitiation, they got me in touch with the regional coordinator. Just a couple weeks before I moved to Britain, we met for lunch. She really liked my enthusiasm and my outlook. She especially thought I would make a good member because I'm a university administrator - helping students is what I do! She said I was just what they were looking for in a member. She then gave me the application forms for alumnae initiation and asked me to keep in touch while in the UK and to definitely give them a call when I return home to the US.

I was excited. Though, just between all of us I was a little disappointed that she took so long to finally get it in gear. Had we moved forward with this in a timely fashion, I could have been initiated *before* going to England. Oh well. As I mentioned, I was really happy with that result and I was looking forward to becoming a member of Saltimbanco upon my return.

I attempted I keep in touch with a couple of collegiates and the Regional Coordinator with mixed results. It’s no surprise that they started to forget about me; after all, I was in England for nearly a year and a half. My biggest cheerleader, the collegiate president had graduated and actually went on to become a travelling consultant for Saltimbanco's HQ (and she definitely deserved to get that job!). After a while, it seemed like Saltimbanco really had forgotten about me and there was nothing I could do.

After a total of three years spent on this group, Saltimbanco sort of just dwindled away.

[navane]

Ok, it's late again, I'll have to finish tomorrow...


Sorry!


.....Kelly

[breathesgelatin]

Whoa! What a crazy story!

I can't wait to hear the rest!!!

[Tom Earp]

Kelly, "Will You Stop it"~

I am as bad if not worse on wanting to know what is going on and this is killing me along with JillyBean and others!

Jill, move back across the border, phone bill was OOOOOOOOOOH So Big!

[polarpi]

Originally posted by breathesgelatin
Whoa! What a crazy story!

I can't wait to hear the rest!!!

I agree...I've been checking every night to see if there's anything new added to the story....

[navane]

Ack! Sorry! I've been really busy this week with trying to take care of a lot of tasks due to the fact that I've just moved to a new place. Plus, my boyfriend decided to fly out from England to visit me for a week or so.

There's still a little bit of story left to go yet. I'll do my best to get the rest of it up here this week so that everyone can be updated on where I am with the AI journey.


.....Kelly

[Tom Earp]

K screw the boy friend, oops, not what I really ment!

Just want to know how it goeth!

Still got the Card, looking at it right now!

A Pack Rat for certain people!

Ya In The A List!

Hoping the best for you My Love!

[polarpi]

Originally posted by navane
Ack! Sorry! I've been really busy this week with trying to take care of a lot of tasks due to the fact that I've just moved to a new place. Plus, my boyfriend decided to fly out from England to visit me for a week or so.

There's still a little bit of story left to go yet. I'll do my best to get the rest of it up here this week so that everyone can be updated on where I am with the AI journey.


.....Kelly

Oh, take your time....just not too long

Thinking great thoughts for you, Kelly!

[navane]

Ok! I've sent my boyfriend home and I now have a few moments to conclude my updated story.


Right, so I had left for England with Saltimbanco's Alumnae Initiation forms in my possession and a promise that they'd get right on it when I returned to the US.

But that wasn't meant to be.

My e-mails went unanswered and there was nothing I could really do short of show up on someone's doorstep. LOL The Regional Coordinator did reply to one of my e-mails in a general "hey, how's it going" fashion, but she never said anything about the AI process, even though I gently asked her about how we could go about picking up where we left off.

I returned home from England eight months ago and I never did hear back from anyone at Saltimbanco.

So what was I to do? I thought about it quite a bit and decided that I didn't want to give up. Though, I was faced with the prospect of having to start alllllll over again.

I reviewed the list of sororities which offered AI and wasn't sure where to start. I mean, I wanted to pursue a group I really believed in...not just one I thought would take me. There are some really nice sororities which do AI, but only a small handfull which I felt I would consider.

But here's the weird thing, the ones I really liked were also the ones I never "really" considered before because I saw them as these prestigious organizations that I probably would never have a chance to be a part of. I guess I just thought I shouldn't even consider them because, given my personal experience with members and chapters, I probably wasn't "good enough". I know that seems kind of dumb for an adult to say, but opinions formed in the youth are sometimes hard to break.

Nonetheless, I decided to check into a couple more. One of those groups, Alegria, did AI but had a particular policy I needed some clarification on. Someone from Alegria HQ responded to me and answered my question in a positive direction. She also forwarded my e-mail to a Regional Coordinator in my area. That person e-mailed me right away to introduce herself. Wouldn't you know it, it so happens that this person and I happend to be "aquaintances" of sorts! Anyway, she was very positive about AI with Alegria and was eager to pass my name around to alumnae in my area. Cool!

The Alegria Regional Coordinator put my name forward to the Chapter Advisor of one of the universities in town. That lady was very excited and very positive to hear about my interest. Right away she was asking me if I would be interested in helping out the chapter and so on. It seemed like things were already moving along.

However, as AI efforts normally go, I didn't hear from anyone for many weeks. Nearly three months later, I followed up with the Chapter Advisor again. The poor Chapter Advisor was having an overwhelmingly busy semester and she just couldn't find a good event to invite me to. So I waited.....and waited.

I never heard from her again.

[navane]

Alegria got off to a promising start, but seemed to stall.

As a last ditch effort, I explained the situation to the Regional Coordinator who had first contacted me. She managed to get the e-mail address of the President of the local alumnae chapter.

Armed with that info, I e-mailed the President. She replied with a warm response inviting me to an upcoming event. She asked me to phone her so that we could chat. When I called, she explained to me that the event in question was a "card party" and wanted to know if I knew how to play bridge. I had no idea how to play bridge. She then asked me which card games I did know how to play. This woman seemed to me to be an older lady and I felt embarassed telling her that I only know how to play blackjack and poker. I thought that she must think that I was some kind of beer-swilling hooligan who didn't know how to play ladylike card games. Of course, I'm not a beer-swilling hooligan, but I digress.

On top of that, she said that there was a problem in that bridge is played in teams....and all of the teams had been filled. We sort of struggled for a bit, I felt like she was trying to hard to accomodate me but couldn't. I didn't want her to feel obligated or anything.

She said that she would check with one of the other members and either she or the other lady would get back to me on the card party event. In the meantime, she tried to come up with some other ideas. She said that there was a meeting coming up, but I couldn't attend because it was an election meeting and non-members couldn't attend. She said that the next thing after that was Alegria's Founder's Day. Unfortunately, that was the one day I had something else scheduled that I simply could not cancel on. She then said that nothing else would be going on until next October or so. That would have been an 8-9 month wait. Finally, she got my hopes up by saying "Would you be interested in possibly helping out with the collegiate girls?" I answered very enthusiastically and then she said, "Oh...wait...you can't....you're not a sister."



I felt so bad, she clearly tried hard to come up with something, but it didn't work out. I thought I would give the card party a go, but neither she nor the other sister gave me a call. I didn't attend.

A couple weeks later, I happened to meet another aquaintance who is a member of Alegria. She heard about the difficulty we had been having, and felt awful about it. She was very sweet and wanted to do something to help. Though, I knew that there was nothing coming up for another 8 months. I explained that I just couldn't bear waiting around that long to see if I might possibly be invited around to meet the ladies.

I started to get the feeling that, after 8 months of waiting, and the prospect of waiting 8 months more, there simply wasn't a place for me with Alegria.

All of the Alegria sisters I knew are especially classy ladies. It was sad that it didn't work out after all.





Then along came Varekai.