crying on Bid Day

[FirstAndFinest]

Originally posted by Blue Violets
Didn't read the whole thread, but wanted to mention this is especially sticky @ my school because after PanHel hands out the bids (in this big student center, to all 400 freshmen girls who rush) all of the new members are led by their Rho Chis in a big group to the gym. Then each sorority's (we have 9) sophomore class comes in and one by one each group claps and does their rush chant (there's probably an official word for it--we do "Pi Pi ADPi") and leads out their group of girls (roughly 35-40 each year). So the girls who hypothetically wanted one specific sorority, for example, but didn't get it gets the lovely chance to sit there and watch as all of the girls IN that new bid class get up and leave with their group.....I remember seeing more than one crying girl in the big group of 400 freshmen girls as we chanted and left with our new alphas!

How insensitive! I guess the school feels it's ok since there are no women present who did not receive a bid at all, but still!

[ThetaPrincess24]

The year I went through recruitment, we had one crier, and a few who didnt get their first choice. None of them quit, and in the end ended up being happy and great sisters.


I suicided on my bid card, because I only wanted Theta. Had I not gotten in Theta, I wouldve been upset, but I wouldnt have regretted my decision to suicide. It was Theta or nothing at all for me.

[BadSquirrelBeta]

This thread is just bringing back too many memories...BAD ones.

Now, I have to say that I thank my lucky stars that I got my first choice, but I know that it was close for me between AGD and XYZ because the rotation at AGD got messed up and I didn't meet as many girls at the beginning of rush at AGD. Thank God we still did open houses then so they knew that I was interested because I went to all the open house events as well as the formal rush events.

XYZ was rushing me very hard and I felt really bad because I was so in love with AGD. It hurt when I saw them after I got my bid because I really liked them but I just knew that AGD was for me!

But, as I matured in my Greek and campus life, I really did adopt the philosophy that I could have done fine in any house and the culture at the time really promoted being "open minded" throughout rush and about all the other GLOs.

It does hurt though as a member that has worked so hard during rush to have a whole crew of rushees show up hysterically crying and overhear them saying very horrible things to their parents on the phone about how the girls are horrid, etc., and blaming the chapter that bid them for their bad rush experience. That happened one year when the hand matching of the bids was not done correctly, and there were girls that were bid to all the houses that had not been there since Day 2 and in some cases, Day 1 . The pictures are horrible from that day and it was so hurtful, as that pledge class didn't really bond with the rest of the house and so many of them dropped. All the members in the other chapters were in the same boat too. It was just a hard year all the way around.

The saddest story that I remember was this girl was IN LOVE with ABC and told everyone during rush that it was ABC or nothing. Well, with an attitude like that of course she didn't have a good rush and was hanging on by a thread. Well, of course she didn't get ABC and ended up with a bid from another house, who was a great house. Well, she went over to the ABC's anyway and in the commotion, was given a t-shirt and was hiding her bid card. At that time we had firetrucks take us around and she was climbing onto the truck of ABC when the members of ABC started to realize that something wasn't right along with some of the members of the Panhellenic staff. Well, the Panhell staff went over to her and she insisted she was bid to ABC and her card said that she was (which it wasn't). Then she kind of went into shock and the Panhellenic staff was helping her take off the t-shirt that she had been given and lead her over to the chapter that she was bid to. I felt so sorry for all of them, but as the day went on, the girl had a complete meltdown and refused to come out of the president's room. The girls mother even called the president and the university repeated times and kept blaming the chapter that had picked the girl up for all the problems. It really didn't help the morale of that chapter, as they were not having a good time with their numbers, etc., and it made the members feel so bad.

The girl did end up de-pledging and her parents threatened legal action. They tried to get her into ABC chapter by calling them all the time too. It was so sad and ugly. When the members saw this girl a few weeks later at a party they said hello, just to be friendly and also feel the waters, as they were COBing and the rushee was so rude to them and had another meltdown. Then her mother was calling all over creation again and claimed that the members of the house that she had dropped were stalking her.

Ugh--that would make me just want to wash my hands of the whole process. Obviously the girl had some real issues and didn't last long at college.

But, I am glad that there are those girls that stick it out. My best friend was one of those girls and I would have no idea what my college and sorority experience would have been if she would not have been my pledge sister. She was bawling her head off on the fire truck but gave it "the old college try". We just got back from our chapter's International Reunion Day celebration last weekend and we were talking about her rush and pledging experience. We were meant to be together, plain and simple.

[Jill1228]

Did any of this happen during this fall recruitment?

[KSUViolet06]

I cried on Bid Night this fall. This was my first recruitment on the other side. I preffed a girl who EVERYONE in my chapter wanted. She was a junior with great grades, extracurriculars, pleasant, the ideal PNM. She knew alot of us from classes and we were all excited she was rushing but of course urged her to keep an open mind.

So I preffed this girl and we ALL wanted her very badly. The entire day waiting on Bid Night I secretly hoped we'd get her. FYI- here @ KSU, the girls rank their preferences, get matched up, and we don't know where they end up until they go up on the stage to run to their group.

So we're all in the Ballroom and they are calling out bids in alphabetical order. It's the girl's turn, and I'm holding my breath, and like praying that we get her. So the Panhellenic Prez announces "Suzy Q is now a new member of ........Sigma Sigma Sigma!" I started CRYING tears of joy as she ran to me with her goodie bag in hand. That was most definitely a Kodak moment.

[The B Girl]

Great story Jocelyn! It makes me want to cry!

[PhoenixAzul]

I know firsthand about crying. I felt bad, but due to my inability to check voicemail messages on my room phone, I missed the PX call about me not having final party bids. So I showed up to the meeting and they had to pull me aside and explain it, and I got really upset. I did my preference signing the friday before everyone else did theirs.So I spent a weekend being all smiles and pats on the back for everyone while they went to their finals. Pref day came, got a call saying no-bid...not a big deal, kinda resigned. But then on Monday (pref signing is on a sunday, NM night is a monday) I got a call from the director of Greek Life saying that my no. 1 choice offered me a bid, and that I could have it if I still wanted. This of course inspired a lot of yelling/cheering/crying for me. When I picked up the bid, I found my neighbor/new sister and we started singing "No eating here tonight, no eating here tonight you're on a diet" from Finding Nemo (don't ask). But still, I don't regret my choice to accept to this day.

[bordeaux hearts]

My school is another one that makes you put down two choices no if, ands, or buts. So there are people who will be unhappy...I knew personally if i didnt get Alpha Phi but the group that i listed second i would have cried and then not accepted them.

the one good thing about our rush is that the girls are given their bids (or called saying they have no bids) earlier that day so that there are no tears on bid night.

[CarolinaDG]

We had a girl who wanted Tri-Delta and not us, so she was bawling on bid day (this was actually the year before I pledged, but you can tell in the pictures she was crying). I'm not sure how they dealt with her, but she went on to become very active... a choreographer for all of our skits and vprogramming (which is the second highest office in DG). She kept a few friends from Tri-Delt, but in the end she was able to admit she fit better in DG.

I was a different story... I had my heart set on one sorority, and after I got cut from them third round, it made me think seriously about what I wanted, and I started bawling because at that point I knew Delta Gamma was where my home was. I also went on to having several friends in that sorority (one is still one of my best friends, today), but because I joined a smaller sorority, I was able to go on and hold several different offices and represent DG on several different occasions. I know if I had joined the other sorority I might not have been able to do that, since it's such a large and competitive sorority, but I would've had the same friends in it, more than likely.

[nongreekloser]

They have no right to cry when lots of other girls don't even get bids.

[33girl]

In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey,
butane in my veins so I'm out to get the junkie
with the plastic eyeballs, spraypaint the vegetables,
dog food stalls with the beefcake pantyhose,
kill the headlights and put it in neutral,
stockcar flaming with a loser in the cruise control,
baby's in Reno with the vitamin D,
got a couple of couches, sleep on the love seat,
someone came sayin' I'm a saint (I'm insane)
to complain about
a shotgun wedding and a stain on my shirt,
don't believe everything that you breathe,
you get a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve,
so shave your face with some mace in the dark,
saving all your food stamps for burning down the trailer park,

yo, cut it
Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me,
double barrel buckshot,
Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me,

forces of evil on a bozo nightmare,
ban all the music with a phony gas chamber
cause one's got a weasel and others got a flag,
one's on the pole, shove the other in the bag,
with the rerun shows and cocaine nose job,
the daytime crap of the folk singers slop,
he hung himself with a guitar string,
a slab of turkey neck and it's hangin' from a pigeon wing,
I can't write if ya' can't relate,
trade the cash for the beef for the body for the hate,
and my time is a piece of wax, fallen on a termite,
who's chokin' on the splinters

Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me
get crazy with the cheez-wiz,
Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me
drive, by, body pierce
yo bring it on down

Soy

(em llik uoy t'nod yhw os ybab resol a m'I, rodedrep nu yoS)

I'm a driver, I'm a winner
things are gonna' change I can feel it

Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me
I can't believe it
Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me

Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me
Sprechen sie deutsch, baby

Soy un perdedor, I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me
You know what I'm sayin'

[PiPhiGirl2005]

33girl, you never cease to amaze!

[KSUViolet06]

I (yet again) cried on Bid Night. There was a PNM on pref night who told me "I really love it here." We'd all been in love with her the ENTIRE time, but we knew that she'd also gone to pref at another chapter. She'd mentioned that she'd had a pretty good time there. So we were on pins and needles at Bid Night wondering if she'd run out to us or XYZ. Sure enough, on Bid Night, she came to us. She had tears in her eyes as she ran STRAIGHT to me saying "Oh my gosh, I was so scared you guys didn't want me!" I hugged her and we both cried. Yes, I'm a dork.

[_Q_]

Originally posted by nongreekloser
They have no right to cry when lots of other girls don't even get bids.

This is sort of OT, but the idea of "nongreek/loser" doesn't make sense. There are a number of groups that do worthwhile things. Some of them are Greek, but many aren't.
I was thinking about this last night, and it seems like it's a matter of finding the setting that best meshes with your own personality. For example, I'm comfortable in some loosely structured community groups and volunteer software teams. But others might prefer the structure of a GLO.
None of these options are intrinsically better or worse than others; the goal is to end up in the best place for you. What kinds of activities do you genuinely enjoy? If you're at a big school, chances are that there's a student club related to that, and you could make some great friends that way.

[33girl]

We've discussed nongreekloser at length. She came on here, posted a bunch of selfhating garbage in a bid for sympathy, and then went away and has never visited again. Thank goodness.

Trust me, she doesn't merit a soupcon of a thought.