Pledges or New Members?

[APhiOKUGrl]

LoL!!!! Okay okay, I see how it is Finito, because you say it, so shall it be. And since we're finished, neither of us have to reply after this post, since we're in agreeance.

[CasanovaAPQ]

APhiOKUGrl


U have every right to say whatever you want your a BROTHER, Key word is BROTHER, MEMBER, IN THE COMPUTER AT THE NATIONAL OFFICE,KNOW THE GRIP, KNOW THE SECRET HANDSHAKE, KNOW THE SECRET WORDS

Do you understand where im coming from, you can say you hate APO and its your right you've seen things met brothers and understand the frat to make a opinion, its just offensive to me that somone who is not in the frat , that is pledging does things that arent cool, also want to compare us to a black greek which we are not, we have black culture but we are not a black greek. it just sounds like she is trying to compare or understand APO from a black greek stance. I use to do that alot until i became a black greek, i see and understand the difference.But hopefully she will learn and love APO for what is it and not for what it is NOT.

[DramaQueen42401]

Cass...see...now this is why I love my brothers. You can't buy truth like that. I wanted deep in my soul to reply, but how can I? Those posts wre beautiful.

Sweet, yes, you did misunderstand me. What I intended was already explained to you, so I feel no need to clarify. If you want that, PM me. If not, (handclasp to you) it's all love.

[GoldnBlue2004]

Ditto to all that the frat has said in order to let the pledge know the realness about Alpha Phi Omega as well as how we are not a black greek lettered organization even though like you mentioned we do have black culture (i.e stepping, party hopping, strolling, etc.). There are many differences in this organization and as a pledge, they will soon learn how to truly love and respect Alpha Phi Omega.

[PrettyKittieJ]

I never said that Alpha Phi Omega was like a BGLO - maybe honestly if some of you read the response instead of taking bits and pieces of it you would see, but just as I said before - none of you will take it as it was meant to be seen or said so Im done with it - say what you want about me, but I know what my words were intended to say and the people to whom it was directed to understood and got it. And thats all the matters to me at this point in time.




For those who care:

Below is what I said

[I]You are a pledge b/c you are pledging your dedication to this fraternity - you become a "new member" when you are initiated. [B]For those who are familiar with BGLO [B] its called "Crossing the burning sands" or "crossing" for short. [B]B/c[B] you are no longer just a regular student, you have crossed over into a new idenity and a new life now. [I]

This statement was NOT made to disrespect Alpha Phi Omega
This statement was NOT made to disrespect ANY organization that is BGL.

This statement is what it meant TO ME to be a "pledge" vs. a "new member."

I used the BGLO reference as an example to show that you grow from a "pledge" and 'cross' into "new membership." I felt without this reference that some would not understand what I mean by "crossing."

This is not about the actual ACTIONS of crossing - it is about the spirit of it and what it means to the individual. (As well as the pledge class/line as a whole)

Many Brothers have spoken that at their Chapters they have some Black Greek influence and this maybe why they were offended, at this school - we dont have that.

BTW - I dont think that b/c of my parents I know what being Greek is like (BG, NPC - doesnt matter). I speak from the experiences of things I have done in my life.

ALSO interested parties ARE allowed to post on Black Greek sites. These people are called "sisterfriends" or "brotherfriends" and I have NEVER seen them treat ANYONE the way I have been treated on this forum and guess what? I speak the same way there that I do here and I am respected for my opinion. I ONLY give my opinion in areas that I have experience and the proof to back it up. Speaking on toast songs and secret handshakes, etc. - I dont even click on the topic, out of RESPECT. BUT REGARDLESS of who you are, if you disrespect me I will treat you the same way you treat me. And thats not a PLEDGE to BROTHER basis - That Human to human - woman to man - woman to woman.





THANK YOU: To the 3 Brothers who offered support and kind words. I appreciate you greatly.

[blueGBI]

PrettyKittieJ,

you really need to quit while you are ahead because seriously, I believe for my brothers at ECU to allow you to pledge, they saw something in you that I DON'T see in your post. Just stop and let this post die.

[PrettyKittieJ]

Originally posted by blueGBI
PrettyKittieJ,

you really need to quit while you are ahead because seriously, I believe for my brothers at ECU to allow you to pledge, they saw something in you that I DON'T see in your post. Just stop and let this post die.

BlueGBI

Im sorry that you feel that way - while this is an internet forum I will continue to defend myself if I will continue to be attacked.
Like 3 pages ago I apologized for anyone who felt offended and it continued from there. The apology was completely overlooked and disregarded.

[Virtuous Woman]

Like 3 pages ago I apologized for anyone who felt offended and it continued from there. The apology was completely overlooked and disregarded

The reason that it was overlooked was that you immediately went back to arguing back and forth with my brothers. If I step on your foot, apologize, and step on your foot again while justifying why I felt that stepping on your foot was necessary, you wouldn't take my apology seriously either.

Stepping into pledge trainer mode:
What are you gaining by arguing with my brothers? What are you seeking to accomplish? What has given you the knowledge and experience to dispute anything about an organization that you are not a part of with people who are? If you see that no matter how hard you try to get everyone to see your perspective, you are unsuccessful and are further angering brothers, why are you continuing? Is the desire to be "right" more important than showing deference to people who are your potential brothers?

I remember what it is to be a pledge. When I was a pledge I saw brothers as people who knew more about Alpha Phi Omega than I did and those I could learn from. I approached brothers as such and reaped the awards thereof. I was able to get some older brothers from my chapter to sit down with me and share some of their experiences and knowledge with me. I was only able to have these experiences because of my HUMBLE attitude towards those in the organization.

HERE'S THE GOLDEN MESSAGE: If a brother said something about Alpha Phi Omega that I did not agree with (and that did happen), I did not feel the need to correct, argue, or even question his or her knowledge because I understood that as a pledge, I only had a part of the big picture. It did not take anything away from me not to argue. I did not feel like less of a person and I still felt like I had a valid point that I would express at an appropriate time.

I hope that you take this post in the spirit in which it was written (which was that of Alpha Phi Omega in its truest sense). Good luck on the rest of your pledge process and I hope that you continue to grow and that you do finally get to see the light of Alpha Phi Omega.

ANY FURTHER COMMENTS TO ME SHOULD BE SENT TO MY PM BOX

[Attractive#7]

well said BROTHER!!! That was so beautiful i enjoyed it. This whole thread has been sooooooooooooo funny!!! I wish i would go to AKA Ave and do an IVY stance or stomp over to the DIVA-STATING DIVAS of DST and drop off my 19.13 cents worth of anything. rofl On the way back I'll stop and see the sigs and drop off a wee-oop and a Z-Phi So Sweet to them ladies in blue...and as far as the SGRho's I'm already reppin Blue and Gold so what's up?!?

Prettie...don't take it to heart...you have heart...that's a good thing...you are willing to hold your own...that's a good thing...you don't follow the crowd, that's a great thing...and you willing to do what you feel is right regardless of what others think...thats great sweetie but you are still a pledge...let me tell you a lil something about our history...

Frank Reed Horton wanted to create an organization where the pledges were treated as equals to the Brothers. I can only speak for myself...when I read this I thought a lot of the same things that my brothers thought but I'm in a good mood right now so I'll be nice. It is not our intention to treat you like crap cuz you ain't frat...but you don't have the same rights and priviledges as frat yet either. There were times where my Big Brothers from my chapter and others did and said things that I didn't agree with, but I knew that this was not my time to shine. After I crossed *and I didn't cross nobody's burning sands...we don't use that term* I was and still am one of the most outspoken brothers you will ever meet. I am tight on my info and history cuz I choose to be...even still let me meet frat thats fall 02 or older...I'm meeting them like hey how you doing and I show them love and I realize that they have been in the frat longer than I have...even if its only a semester. I was the vp of my chapter last yr and I hold a position on the sectional staff this yr. If I were to meet a brother thats older than me that has not been active since they "crossed" I'm not gone act like I"m better than them cuz i hold a position or i got knowledge...I'm still comin to them humble b/c they might have something that they can teach me...and you can teach older frat stuff...i have done so many times but it's all in how you do it...

let me let you in on a lil secret...you can say whatever you want to say it's all in how you say it...i have corrected older brothers but just not in a disrespectful way...as much as you "might not" have tried to have been disrespectful the point is you came in here speaking to us like we didnt know *ish*...now had that been me when they got in my tail the first time I would have digressed and thought about my mistake and made sure that my next appearance was one that was a lil less drama free.

All in all you got heart girl!!! Stay that way...but in all things be respectful...

To my brothers in all things you do don't forget
Leadership, Friendship, and Service

and like frat said earlier...n e questions comments or concerns...i got a pm box that's waitin to be flooded with correspondence.

EDITED TO ADD...and that's MY .25 worth!!!

[CasanovaAPQ]

im sorry im about to say some stuff that may seem cruel.

1- im not going to give her props for having a heart, there people on this forum all the time who come on here and talk garbage. ITs not like we going to do anything to them, there over the internet, to me, when you start PMing people and asking for phone number to talk to them thats heart. Its still profilin cause i dont think would ever say that thing she saying in any brothers face and if she does thatr at her chapter then i say the chapter is weak.

2-Let her come to some southern chapters with the crap, since she from a co-ed chapter go to howard, tenn state, NC a&t, fisk, etc.. with the crap and see how long she last as a pledge.

3- wheather its a co-ed chapter, all male, on the black side sweety we take the frat VERY VERY VERY seriously( not that alot of mixed or white chapters dont i knwo alot who do) so i suggest you learn you info then talk cause a person like her will be laughed at. Im from a moslty white chapter and i knew my place and leanr laot from my white brother so you need ot do that same.

Im sorry but i hate these people the get into our fraternity with these chapters that make APO look like a social club or a way to hook up with people, or an outlet for people to get friend that didnt have any before or for the resume, this is a fraternity not a joke and it really kills me to meet people or chapter who take it that way. Buts its the same people who get to be in the sectional or regional or national board , and it need to stop wheather your a girl or guy, if you love this frat we all need to speak up, we need to start making brothers and not members. Im sorry but ive been holding that back for a while.

[naraht]

Originally posted by CasanovaAPQ
we need to start making brothers and not members.

No, we need those who will make themselves brothers. The vote of the chapter is confirming those pledges who have made themselves brothers and the initiation ceremony is to make it official.

I have met those who were already worthy of being brothers the day that they started pledging. On the day they started pledging they didn't know the names of the 14 founders, (and I know board members, whose brotherhood I'll put up against anyone, who can't name all 14) and didn't know whether their chapter had a parlimentarian. But that can be learned and a willingness to learn is what *should* be part of any college student's character.

"Making brothers" to me implies that the external actions that the chapter does are what is entirely responsible for the pledges becoming worth to be brothers, and to me, that view leads to tests of physical stamina in pledging that have nothing to do with whether someone is worthy to be a brother of this fraternity. I hope that this is not what you mean by the term making brothers and would welcome discussion as to what may be more clear terminology.



YiLFS
Randy Finder

[CasanovaAPQ]

No one is talking about hazing or anything physical, what i mean is as brothers if we dont show people who are interested in the fraternity how we love this fraternity or how serious we take this fraternity people will become brothers with that kind of attitude. And we do "MAKE" brothers, they couldnt become a brother unless a brother is involved so yes we are "making" brothers. You are right if they dont have that love and dont want to learn then they will be like that but if they dont see other brothers taking this fraternity seriously then they wont, thats just the way it is. You are effected by your environment. Please dont go there about hazing or anything like that, this forum is far from that and i am very insulted that you would even go there. Would you had said that to someone who wasnt an ay-phi-que? ive seen many post on here that you could take anyway but you never comment on them so please dont comment on mines, what you need to be doing is commenting on her not on me. So please lets get back to the topic at hand.

[naraht]

Originally posted by CasanovaAPQ
No one is talking about hazing or anything physical, what i mean is as brothers if we dont show people who are interested in the fraternity how we love this fraternity or how serious we take this fraternity people will become brothers with that kind of attitude. And we do "MAKE" brothers, they couldnt become a brother unless a brother is involved so yes we are "making" brothers. You are right if they dont have that love and dont want to learn then they will be like that but if they dont see other brothers taking this fraternity seriously then they wont, thats just the way it is. You are effected by your environment. Please dont go there about hazing or anything like that, this forum is far from that and i am very insulted that you would even go there. Would you had said that to someone who wasnt an ay-phi-que? ive seen many post on here that you could take anyway but you never comment on them so please dont comment on mines, what you need to be doing is commenting on her not on me. So please lets get back to the topic at hand.

This fraternity had many chapters charter in the 1950s and before that *never* saw a brother of Alpha Phi Omega fraternity until a staff member came out from Nationals to run the chartering ceremony. (Eta Omicron at Brigham Young U as an example) And others where there was one visit to interview those interested and then a chartering visit.

My objections to "make brothers" are largely the result of readings that use the term "Made Brothers" as opposed to "Paper Brothers" in the NPHC.

Also, could you be a little more specific on

Originally posted by CasanovaAPQ
Im sorry but i hate these people the get into our fraternity with these chapters that make APO look like a social club or a way to hook up with people, or an outlet for people to get friend that didnt have any before or for the resume, this is a fraternity not a joke and it really kills me to meet people or chapter who take it that way. Buts its the same people who get to be in the sectional or regional or national board...

Do you have any specific members of the National Board who you feel didn't get into the fraternity at a chapter that "make APO look like a social club", etc?

Strangely enough, I can (almost))speak to the pledging experience of at least one member of the board, the current Region V director pledged my chapter the semester after I graduated. I doubt the chapters was significantly different the semester he pledged than my last one.

And yes, I would make that comment to any brother.

YiLFS
Randy Finder

[gamma_girl52]

Originally posted by Attractive#7
On the way back I'll stop and see the sigs and drop off a wee-oop

Oh REALLY?

I just wanted to mess with Attractive for a second. Seriously.
Carry on!

[ladygreek]

Sorry for crashing, but I must say I was offended by PrettyKJ's post because she also spoke with "authority" on BGLOs. She is not a member of one and having family members who are does not make her knowledgeable. If fact, if she really knew what she was talking about she would also know about discretion. Just my $19.13 worth.