Update on ex-misscashmoney - Page 4

AKA_Monet · #46 08-24-2004, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by alphagam-alum
My advice would be not to call her, unless you want to work on the relationship. If you call just to tell her get control of herself that might easily be taken as a desire to rekindle the relationship.

As far as the meddling mother in law--- I can atest, from personal experience, it is hell on a relationship!!! My mom is the one who thinks my husband is not good enough for me. There is constant tension. And while my mother refrains from saying anything bad in front of our kids, she constantly questions everything my husband says.

In my position it is rough, there is my mom on one hand--the woman that single handedly raised me--and then there is my husband whom I chose to marry and have kids with. I get it from both sides. If you are going to be in a marriage with the stress of the mother in law-- you must have a wife that is strong enough to stand up to her mother. As a mother she should support her daughter in the decisions she makes, not add fuel to the fire. There have been many loud, heated battles with my mom regarding my husband.

It is not a good place to be in. You have to do what is best for yourself. A marriage full of arguments and stress from her mother is not a good way to start a marriage. You will have enough stress on your own, you don't need someone adding to that.

Good luck--- and once again, unless you want to her to misread your intentions with a phone call-- don't call!

-wendi

I concur 1908%...

cashmoney · #47 08-24-2004, 10:17 PM

Monet, she's not a teenager. So stop calling her that. I'm not even going to go in to responding to your post because you have totally misread things. You're reading too deep in it all. It's pointless in talking about it with you. You made too many vague generalizations about her. The only people here who can really make those types of assumptions about her are myself and ZTAngel.

AKA_Monet · #48 08-25-2004, 01:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by cashmoney
Monet, she's not a teenager. So stop calling her that. I'm not even going to go in to responding to your post because you have totally misread things. You're reading too deep in it all. It's pointless in talking about it with you. You made too many vague generalizations about her. The only people here who can really make those types of assumptions about her are myself and ZTAngel.

No, Sweetheart, you are the one that posted on this forum--airing out your "dirty laundry"... And I am calling you on it and now, you say you cannot handle even MY comments???

Just by the mere fact that you are trying to blindside me in not addressing what your issues are with your "potential" mother in law, when you started this topic, in THIS PUBLIC forum, just goes to show folks that you are not standing up to close scrutiny...

My question is simple, were you EVER REALLY PREPARED FOR THE RESPONSIBILITIES OF MARRIAGE TO YOUR NOW EX-GIRLFRIEND???

Because, I am ONLY basing what YOU are saying about this young lady and giving her the benefit of the doubt... That is ALL I can base it on since I do not know her...

But any woman that cannot quiet her own mother from damaging an engagement to me, IN MY OPINION, is a teenager--PERIOD... And is DEFINITELY NOT READY FOR AN ADULT MARITIAL RELATIONSHIP...

That is the way it is in the REAL WORLD when you've got Mortgages and Homeowner's Association Dues--one really cannot be cryin' to mama when chit don't work out as planned...

cashmoney · #49 08-25-2004, 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AKA_Monet
No, Sweetheart, you are the one that posted on this forum--airing out your "dirty laundry"... And I am calling you on it and now, you say you cannot handle even MY comments???

Calling me on it? WTF are you calling me on?

And I didn't say I couldn't handle your comments, I just said you're reading too deep in it all. Personally, the first thing that came to my mind was that you smoked too much pot before you responded to my post when you wrote your ghettofied text in the first response. I could barely even understand what you wrote. For a minute there I thought you were Tom Earp's 2nd screen name. I never said you couldn't respond, this is a public forum. Believe me, I can handle the critics here. I just said I didnt feel like wasting the time to respond to that 2nd long ass post of yours. I didnt even finish reading half of it.

cashmoney · #50 08-25-2004, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Munchkin03
Run cashmoney, run.

Sometimes watching Forrest Gump can teach you good lessons.

Lady Pi Phi · #51 08-25-2004, 11:02 AM

Obviously I don't know you or your ex, but I kind of agree with AKAMonet on this one.

It seems to me that there are deeper issue surrounding your break up, you just don't want to address them. I honestly feel that if both of you were 100% ready for marriage you would have been able to work together on the MIL issue. If she was ready to "cut the umbilical cord" so to speak, she would have been able to stand up to her mother.
There's nothing wrong with realizing that your not ready for this kind of commitment, but I think it's unfair to blame this 100% on her mother (even if she is the uber bitch you make her out to be). You two have to take some of blame.

Anyway, you came her for the quick answer so many people have said it. DON'T CALL HER. If you truely want nothing more to do with her, calling her will only make her hurt more.
If you do want to try and work things out, please don't rule out couples counseling. It's not as "ghey" has you think. It can help both of you discuss the deeper issues, which I think you are trying to avoid.

cashmoney · #52 08-25-2004, 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lady Pi Phi
It seems to me that there are deeper issue surrounding your break up, you just don't want to address them.

There were no deeper issues. Everything was fine till MIL chimed in. There were no problems, no fights ,no bitching, no hurt feelings, nothing bad. It was amazing. Everyone around us couldn't believe that things were the way they were. People were jealous.

Lady Pi Phi · #53 08-25-2004, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cashmoney
There were no deeper issues. Everything was fine till MIL chimed in. There were no problems, no fights ,no bitching, no hurt feelings, nothing bad. It was amazing. Everyone around us couldn't believe that things were the way they were. People were jealous.

Okay, fair enough. Only you know for sure.
But why do you think the MIL has/had problems with you?

cashmoney · #54 08-25-2004, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lady Pi Phi
Okay, fair enough. Only you know for sure.
But why do you think the MIL has/had problems with you?

I don't think, I know why. She told ex-misscashmoney she doesnt like me because I remind her of her husband....to the point where she thinks we're exactly the same. It makes sense, her dad already told me how he felt about me, miss-cashmoney felt the way she did about me and already told me that was one of the many reasons why she fell for me.....I remind her exactly of her dad. Her mother is unhappily married to her husband/ex-misscashmoney's dad.....and if I remind her of him then its a given she's not going to like me.

ilovemyglo · #55 08-25-2004, 01:55 PM

Sounds like she still has a lot of growing up to do.
She needs to be woman enough to say, Mom this is the man I want to marry, either you support us or you don't but he is staying.

Did you ever say anything to the effect of
"babe, I love you, but lately this thing with me and your mom- and you always seem to be on her side- well I need to know, can you please tell her to lay off and take care of her own marriage?" Or something to that affect?

But if you really just want a "should I or shouldn't i call her?"

HELL NO! Don't do it- cause then she will believe SHE DOES have you wrapped around her finger tight.
and shell think you are crawling back to her.

cashmoney · #56 08-25-2004, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ilovemyglo
Sounds like she still has a lot of growing up to do.
She needs to be woman enough to say, Mom this is the man I want to marry, either you support us or you don't but he is staying.

Did you ever say anything to the effect of
"babe, I love you, but lately this thing with me and your mom- and you always seem to be on her side- well I need to know, can you please tell her to lay off and take care of her own marriage?" Or something to that affect?

But if you really just want a "should I or shouldn't i call her?"

HELL NO! Don't do it- cause then she will believe SHE DOES have you wrapped around her finger tight.
and shell think you are crawling back to her.

You're one of the reasons why I like AGDs.

Buttonz · #57 08-25-2004, 06:57 PM

If you want to work things out, and think that they can be worked out, then call her. If not, then don't. My ex decided he wanted to remain friends and we did for almost 6 months on and off...and all we did was fight. It took me almost a full year to get over him, and I was a lil more then a month into my current relatonship (my first since him) when he decided he wanted to be back in my life. I spoke to him one phone call, and told him that could never be. I couldn't be happier with him out of my life, and it took me months to realize that. Don't call her unless you want to try and work it out, it does seem as if you still love her.

ilovemyglo · #58 08-26-2004, 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by cashmoney
You're one of the reasons why I like AGDs.

Do u really need any other reasons! LOL! So just kidding!

cashmoney · #59 08-26-2004, 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ilovemyglo
Do u really need any other reasons!

I like that.

DGqueen17 · #60 08-26-2004, 01:30 PM

It wouldn't have worked out anyway, cashmoney.

Girls are always bitches.