Hazing Experience

[AlethiaSi]

I've read this entire thread and all of you have said some interesting things.... idk... my two cents seems to be similar to what other people have said.... however, I come from a different perspective i guess you could say. I pledged for a sorority that will remain nameless and was nationally recognized. I loved the girls but I hated what they had done to me... after pledging three weeks i was reduced to an anxious mess and had to depledge. They did not ever touch me or single me out with comments against me... but the whole process was just too much (screaming- yelling- dressing up in rediculous outfits.. etc) . I have many good friends that are In now and continue to carry on the similar rituals that I went through... ( i do admit though that they are changing their program a little... but only to benefit themselves to keep girls in)... anyway... I am now in a local sorority and my pledging program was about 3 weeks and was a blast- yea there was stuff i didn't want to do (scavenger hunts.... rituals.... games- etc) and i won't lie that there was some yelling... as far as learning our information was concerned- NEVER would we single any pledge out.... I have seen 4 other pledge classes come through and they have all said the process changed their lives.... and hope to become pledge mistress. My point in all of this rambling however... is that I do find hazing (not drinking or physically or emotionally harming them) absolutely necessary. I have been on both sides of the situation and have come to this conclusion after seeing the bonds that have developed... even the organization i pledged for previously- i am still very close to them because we share that experience..... nu sigma chi has been around since 1928.... on our own accord- no nationals to back us... there is a reason why we are still here...

I have read all of your responses and i think they are your opinions and are most definately right....but for you... i think that this debate is never ending and everything is relative.... the pledging process is different for everyone....

if there is physical or severe emotional harm... report it without a doubt..... no friendship is worth that.....

[GammaGirl1219]

Ok i also read this whole thread and figured i would chime in too. Frist of all to ydu0lc i would advise you at least not to let this fraternity be your only experiance with greek life. Pledging a sorority is one of the best things that i ever did and is proably a posistion that most GCers have. So maybe if you are still interested in the system you could rush another one. when it comes to hazing, ask not only the brothers themselves but other people and other greeks on campus ( it might surprise you who knows what about what greeks do)

Secondly, on the topic of hazing in general i do not think anyone should ever put another person in a situation that can be/ is mentally or emotionally harmful. However, i do think that New members should have certain responsiblites. No they shouldnt have to run personal favors, or drink till they puke, but they should have to know and be accountable for knowing information, such as our founders or things about current sisters. After all why would you want to be part of an organization that you dont know anything about.

Hazing is a very broad term in some respects. yes its written in to most states law codes, in national GLO proceedures, and school laws. however i do believe that some people,schools, and so on are hypersensitive.

For example, this past semester at my school a girl' s mother reported that her daughter was being hazed (not by my sorority, though it effected our whole greek community) She reported that the organization MADE her daughter wear certian things(nothing disrespectful, just like a tshirt in the color of the sorority one day a week) and a pledge pin, and forced her to attend meetings and hold a pledge book (which was used to obtain information on sisters and such). Now not to sound coldhearted or pugnacious but to me that is ridicolous.
None of the girls complaints were about anything that would put her in danger, yet were to make her feel closer to her pledge class and the sorority.

This is just an example of how sometimes the fear of hazing is slightly an over reaction. I was never hazed. however my pledge period wasn't just peaches and cream and i went through it because being a sister was something i wanted.because of this i do feel like i completely earned my letters.i think that is what makes me a very active sister and in many respects a better person.

Like many other topics, i think this is one of those gray areas where everyone has an opinion or an experiance. well this is just mine.

Kate

[justamom]

GammaGirl1219 I am pretty much in line with your feelings.
BUT-
Escalation of hazing in a chapter seems to be very real because of the "I had to do it-so should you" way of thinking. Until GC, I never saw the effects of hazing. I honestly thought it was fodder for TV shows. What an eye-opener. Ripped those rose colored glasses right off!

So far back in this thread, wasn't it LXAAlum who mentioned undisclosed/unknown medical histories? This is something that plays in the back of my mind and why even seemingly "innocent' situations can turn deadly.

I follow a few college newspapers, and it is amazing the written responses you get on the issues of hazing. Just like on GC, you have every kind of response, from total damnation to the same old, "If they don't EARN it, they don't deserve it." One editorialist went so far as to describe the new members as wusses for "not being able to take it and ALLOWING the information to be confirmed. I guess the writer expected them to LIE.

I honestly do see a lot of grey and feel many of the banned traditions like- study hours-profiles-projects-as a loss. But like Tom said-If Nationals has said "NO MORE", then that's what chapters MUST abide by.

Of all the threads on hazing, I think this thread is the best example of thoughtful dialogue. I want to thank all who posted thus far for sharing their insight. I could quote every single one of you! Excellent!

[LXAAlum]

Originally posted by justamom
GammaGirl1219 I am pretty much in line with your feelings.
BUT-
Escalation of hazing in a chapter seems to be very real because of the "I had to do it-so should you" way of thinking. Until GC, I never saw the effects of hazing. I honestly thought it was fodder for TV shows. What an eye-opener. Ripped those rose colored glasses right off!

So far back in this thread, wasn't it LXAAlum who mentioned undisclosed/unknown medical histories? This is something that plays in the back of my mind and why even seemingly "innocent' situations can turn deadly.

I follow a few college newspapers, and it is amazing the written responses you get on the issues of hazing. Just like on GC, you have every kind of response, from total damnation to the same old, "If they don't EARN it, they don't deserve it." One editorialist went so far as to describe the new members as wusses for "not being able to take it and ALLOWING the information to be confirmed. I guess the writer expected them to LIE.

I honestly do see a lot of grey and feel many of the banned traditions like- study hours-profiles-projects-as a loss. But like Tom said-If Nationals has said "NO MORE", then that's what chapters MUST abide by.

Of all the threads on hazing, I think this thread is the best example of thoughtful dialogue. I want to thank all who posted thus far for sharing their insight. I could quote every single one of you! Excellent!

Thanks JAMOM! You're right - it's the "'I had to do it-so should you' way of thinking" that leads to disaster - sooner or later, someone will believe that "it wasn't all that hard, so let's make it more challenging for the next class" or similar attitudes that leads to the slow, gradual, escalation to a headline, expulsion, suspension, and often death or serious injury.

I remember a thread war a couple of years ago that someone wanted to equate pledging to the same thing as a "boot camp" experience - this "gentlemen" was an Army veteran, and thought that military style discipline was THE answer.

No, it isn't. Unfortunately, the history of most fraternity hazing incidents can be traced back to the late 1940's. Can anyone guess why? Who was in college in the late 1940's? That's right - WWII veterans. Millions of them. And many of them brought the military discipline experiences with them. Eventually, the 60's and 70's started to mix alcohol with the then-modified military style humiliation of hazing, and that's when it really started to become hazardous. A lot of changes, as well as a gradual escalation by chapters, and a gradual decline of national headquarter's oversight by many national GLO's all but guaranteed the outcome - the changes we are having to make for past mistakes.

At least we have the courage to stand up and try to change these stereotypes. It's not easy, but, it can be done.

[sairose]

I've really enjoyed reading this thread. There are some great thoughts here! Thought I'd chime in once again.

I agree that too many people say about hazing, "I had to do it, and so should you" or "it's TRADITION". Well, then start a NEW tradition; one that involves no hazing!

And I understand what a sticky subject hazing is. It's so easy to haze your new members and not even realize it is hazing!! Until this year, my SAI chapter required MITs(members-in-training) to have the sisters quiz them on their learned material of the week and give them "roses" if they did well. Our Province Officer told us at her Official Visit this year that it is hazing and we had to stop. We were a little shocked, but once she explained to us why and we discussed it, we totally understood why.

I remember, as an SAI pledge, it was a little intimidating to approach the sisters for their "roses". And not that they ever yelled at me if I got something wrong...they NEVER did that! They were super nice and encouraged us, etc. But to shyer new girls, I can TOTALLY see how this could cause undue stress.

So, after talking with her, we reformatted this practice. We will now ASK the MIT if they would like us to help them study, but not make it a requirement. We will also have THEM quiz US...after all, some of us may have gotten rusty on our SAI history. Plus, this will make us on the same level on them.

Yeah, at first we were disappointed. It was a tradition in our chapter. But we didn't want to haze either. So, we changed it into this brand new tradition.

(And before you ask, NO it's not hazing to make them learn the material on SAI because it is a national requirement for them to take the National Membership Exam to be initiated)

I guess the point of my ramblings is this. Most GLOs are against hazing, but I think we all (my chapter included, apparantly!) should review hazing and what it encompasses, regularly. Even if you don't mean to, something might be hazing.