Another SEC Recruitment Story, Cut Short

[KSUViolet06]

I will say that not everyone wants to be the "changer of all the things" in a chapter.

Anyway, like I said, if you're cool with potentially not ending up Greek, that's what matters. I genuinely do hope it works out for you. Please let us know how it goes (with these groups or otherwise.)

[ComradesTrue]

Does anyone else feel that the OP is giving out way too many identifying features? Especially given that her permanent interent thoughts aren't all flattering of the chapter involved? I mean, we discourage posters from doing live Formal Recruitment stories, and yet this poster is doing a live COB where the numer of chapters and numbers of PNMs is much, much smaller.

My concern is that she may not have to worry with accepting any potential bid.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by ellebud

Ok ladies....let me be the first to make this observation: When a pmn does informal...meets a lot of women (25!) and doesn't feel "connected" I will just put it out there: Either the OP feels that she is prettier than all the sisters OR this is a Jewish house which the OP didn't want or feel comfortable with that idea.

I'll second this and paraphrase what DBB said: if a chapter is primarily Jewish and you feel uncomfortable with that then JUST SAY SO. It is not a faux pas or going to offend anyone here on GC. This isn't what we mean when we say "don't talk about religion at rush."

This goes the other way, also - if you're Jewish and every single girl you meet is wearing a cross and talks about how much she loves spending time with her church group, no one is going to fault you if you run the other way. Or if you're atheist, or agnostic, or Wiccan.

[redlady2]

FWIW, the historically Jewish chapters at UF are very strong recruiting and are unlikely to be participating in COB. I don't think that's the issue. What I can't figure out is which chapter would have "priorities" that the OP didn't like.

[gatorgeneration]

Perhaps priorities wasn't the right word...maybe preferences of activities and interests? Obviously I don't know everyone's personal beliefs about serious issues, so I can see where that may have been confusing.

I would like to say many of them are friendly and a lot are very sweet and very pretty, and I had no intentions on saying anything unflattering about them. While I could see myself befriending some sisters (like some of you have mentioned, in a chapter of 200+ ladies, there has to be one) I just don't feel comfortable there and just can't see myself as a sister. I can't say what specifically, I don't want to reveal too much information about them or myself.

Again, I recognize and accept that this may be my only opportunity to go Greek. Thank you to those of you that have encouraged me to trust my gut, it hasn't failed me yet.

[Hartofsec]

Originally Posted by gatorgeneration

Perhaps priorities wasn't the right word...maybe preferences of activities and interests? Obviously I don't know everyone's personal beliefs about serious issues, so I can see where that may have been confusing.

I would like to say many of them are friendly and a lot are very sweet and very pretty, and I had no intentions on saying anything unflattering about them. While I could see myself befriending some sisters (like some of you have mentioned, in a chapter of 200+ ladies, there has to be one) I just don't feel comfortable there and just can't see myself as a sister. I can't say what specifically, I don't want to reveal too much information about them or myself.

Again, I recognize and accept that this may be my only opportunity to go Greek. Thank you to those of you that have encouraged me to trust my gut, it hasn't failed me yet.

Hope you found your way (and trusted your gut). Did you decide?

[gatorgeneration]

Hey Ladies, thought I'd post an update in case anyone was interested in hearing what happened. I decided to rethink joining a NPC sorority after my second visit with the COB house. I decided to hold off on considering joining a chapter for several reasons (mainly focusing on school, job, and volunteering). I realize my odds are against me, but I'm reconsidering if I even want to join a NPC sorority and will decide at the end of the fall semester if I want to participate in spring recruitment.

I really appreciate all the advice and warm wishes from you ladies, I'll give another update in the months to come!

[Old_Row]

Good luck with everything!

[tigerivy]

I know I'm late in this, but I just want to wish you the best.
I truly hope that you have come to the decision that being Greek is not the most important thing to you, because, unfortunately, I do think you turned down your last chance to go Greek.
Like you said, you would rather not be Greek than be in a sorority you didn't feel right in.
It is just hard for me to understand those feeling because, despite the reputations of houses or stereotypes, all chapters at big Greek schools are going to have the smart girls, the pretty girls, the religious girls, the party girls, the quiet girls, etc. and all of the sororities are going to be involved in the same activities (for the most part).
I always encourage my rec girls that something made you want to be Greek in the first place, so being a part of any wonderful NPC group is better than turning your back on what could be the greatest home away from home you could ever dream of. Because, honestly, most first (or even second) impressions are wrong.
Again, I wish you the best and hope all is well.

[Blue Skies]

Florida has 16 NPC sororities in a generally strong system. Barring some overriding reason (perhaps you are Jewish and looking for a house with a high Jewish membership,) it seems to me that you ought to be feeling comfortable with most of the chapters. Granted, some might be a better fit than others, but if you dislike most of the chapters, it's probably you and not them (meaning that life in a NPC chapter is likely not a good fit for you.)

[gatorgeneration]

I've decided I'm not going to pursue the Greek life any more, after giving it much thought. I'd rather not put myself through the stress and heartbreak of going through another recruitment, and I'd rather focus my energy on school, volunteering, and the friendships I've already made. I've also decided to study abroad within the next two years for a full academic year, so I plan to network that way.

While I've realized all 16 NPC chapters here have wonderful things to offer to many of girls, I'm just not a good fit for Greek life, which is totally okay. I'm proud of myself for giving it a try, especially since I can be very shy and would have never seen myself going through recruitment while I was still in high school. I'm really happy for all the girls who went through recruitment with me and found fantastic new homes on campus, as well as all the ladies on this forum who are apart of a great sisterhood. I'm glad Greek life gives thousands of girls a place to call home and can create great opportunities for them. The NPC chapters at UF are all full of smart, sweet and gorgeous ladies.

That being said, there's nothing wrong with not going Greek, especially after giving it a try and not finding it to be the best fit for yourself. I say this especially for other girls in my situation who were dropped early, and even those who may have not enjoyed their COB experience. Greek life isn't for everyone, and you're not weird/crazy/ugly/antisocial/an outcast/unpopular/boring/dumb if you don't end up in a sorority. I had trouble realizing this for a while, thinking there must have been something wrong with me since I was dropped, but I've realized that's not true. Greek life just isn't for everyone, and that's okay!

Thanks to all the ladies on this forum for your support!

[Hartofsec]

Originally Posted by gatorgeneration

That being said, there's nothing wrong with not going Greek, especially after giving it a try and not finding it to be the best fit for yourself. I say this especially for other girls in my situation who were dropped early, and even those who may have not enjoyed their COB experience. Greek life isn't for everyone, and you're not weird/crazy/ugly/antisocial/an outcast/unpopular/boring/dumb if you don't end up in a sorority. I had trouble realizing this for a while, thinking there must have been something wrong with me since I was dropped, but I've realized that's not true. Greek life just isn't for everyone, and that's okay!

gatorgeneration, you are right -- after all, the majority of students on campus are not Greek.

I'm so pleased for you that this journey related to sorority membership has brought you to a place where you are so comfortable in your own skin. So many experiences in life don't resolve in the manner we orignially hope, but turn out to be opportunities for personal growth that we didn't expect. Every step along your struggle with this has been worth it.


All the best to you -- the future causes/orgs you choose will be lucky to have you!

[adpimiz]

I'm glad that you've been able to come to a decision that you're comfortable with. Good luck with your future endeavors!

[preciousjeni]

Originally Posted by gatorgeneration

While I've realized all 16 NPC chapters here have wonderful things to offer to many of girls, I'm just not a good fit for Greek life, which is totally okay...That being said, there's nothing wrong with not going Greek, especially after giving it a try and not finding it to be the best fit for yourself.

Good on you for making a tough decision and staying positive. I did want to point out that there are 10 sororities in addition to the NPC groups at UF, if my count is right. I mention this for the interested women/PNMs who might be reading this thread and not realize their options.

[OPhiAGinger]

I applaud you for listening to your heart and finding the right path for you. Since volunteering seems to come naturally to you, I hope you continue to nurture that part of your soul and leverage the campus center for leadership and service to keep you connected to the areas of service that most speak to your heart. Come back and let us know how you're doing from time to time.