advice after the cuts

[BetteDavisEyes]

Originally posted by oldrusheenowmom
As FSU Zeta said, the one thing I knew was a legacy doesn't guarantee-- I am soooo proud of my daughter-- She said she had a great time at her one party last night and spent the time of the other parties outside the houses with the Rho Gams-- They have been sooo sweet and nice to her-- she said some -- not just her's- stopped by her dorm room last night just to visit-- As a mom is it appropriate once "they unveil" to send them a note thanking them for being so kind-- I told my daughter whatever happens, happens-- keeping my fingers crossed that she gets an invite tonight--

Crossing my fingers w/you! I really hope she gets a bid tonight and that she is happy. From what you tell us, she's handled herself really well. You've also done a great job encouraging her.
If and when she receives her bid, can you tell us what house she ends up in?

[FSUZeta]

ditto what honeychile said. i think that the recruitment counselors would be honored to receive a note of thanks.

[ISUKappa]

Originally posted by FSUZeta
ditto what honeychile said. i think that the recruitment counselors would be honored to receive a note of thanks.

Yes. And I would send it to the ISU Panhellenic Office in care of the Rho Gamma Coordinator. She'd be the best one to pass it on to the Rho Gammas.

[SmartBlondeGPhB]

When I went through rush umpteen years ago, I got cut from about half of the houses (7 houses total) after the first day, most likely due to the fact that I didn't fit in and was a bit on the quiet side. I had the good grades and the activities and they didn't help me.

I went to fewer parties all week and only one pref party, but I still found exactly where I was meant to be. Hopefully your daughter will too.

[TXMom]

I hope all goes well....and I'm sure whatever is meant to be will be! That is what I am praying for my daughter that will go through rush starting this weekend! Just like when she tried out for cheerleader each year (something she loved doing!) I always had a back-up plan for her! And I have always felt that God knows better than I or her for what she needs! So if she doesn't get in a sorority...well there are the independent sororities that recruit after rush week, Christian sororities and groups, spirit groups, Church groups etc...etc...! But with saying that.....it's not the end of the world not to get into a sorority....its just we hate to see our little darlings hurt....even if it is only for a moment...and it is what is best! So my prayers to y'all!

[Zillini]

I've been wrapped up in Bama Recruitment and am a little late to this thread, but I'd still like to throw in my 2 cents worth. As a mom I can understand completely every mom's concerns. How could anyone not love my child? As an advisor I know it's not as simple as that. There are all kinds of reasons why someone is cut.

The biggest thing that comes to my mind has already been discussed repeatedly and that's was she memorable, enthusiastic, outgoing, etc? I've seen many PNMs over years that felt that they were at least in their own eyes, yet in the eyes of the recruiters and compared to the other PNMs going through they weren't. At the same time there's a fine line between that and coming across as pushy, cocky, fake enthusiasm, etc. The PNMs may not even be that way in "real life", but that's how they are perceived during the artificial environment of Recruitment.

Another factor in all this might be if ISU has adopted the new NPC Release figure system. (Perhaps someone who knows could say if they have or not.) In a nutshell this requires the GLOs to focus on who they want much earlier in the process than in the past and possibly make bigger cuts. (This is our first year of it and I'm waiting to see how it works.)

But the fact remains that your daughter is going to 1 house for Pref and 1 is all it takes. Even if for some reason it doesn't work out though, it's not the end of the world. Despite the initial pain in the long run this might be a good life learning experience. No one should base their self-worth on the acceptance and approval of others.

I hope it works out for her! To mom, you're doing the best you can and that's all we can do for our kids. No matter how much we may want to, we can't always protect them.

[ilovemyglo]

If it helps any- I went to pref at one house- and I was absolutely thrilled- I was almost determined to suicide AGD before I got my pref invites. My Rho Chi thought I would be upset when I had 4 invites the round before- but when she told me I had been invited back to AGD I felt like I won the lottery!

Everything sort of does happen for a reason!

[Jhawkalum]

Recruitment is always such a mystery to me..... the difference between campuses and orgs is so vast, it can be hard to figure out.

I was a Recruitment Counselor, and I remember that the year I did it, Panhellenic GUARANTEED a bid to every girl who went through pref night and they maximized their options (meaning they didn't suicide or intentionally single preference). The good news was, that meant that the girls who went to one house on pref night, and filled out a pref card, were GUARANTEED a bid by that house. And it worked! I had several girls in my group who only went to one house on pref night, and they all got bids!

Now I'm not sure that guarantee still holds true today at KU, but I wonder if Iowa State has a similar system. I remember it was the first year KU did it like that, and many chapters wound up with quota plus because of it.

ISUKappa -- do you have any idea what ISU's panhellenic policy is for pref night?

PS - I probably would have framed a thank you note from a parent! That would be so touching, and the Recruitment Counselors would probably talk about how classy that is!

[gogoaphi]

I've heard that a number of campuses have guaranteed bid systems. I assume that it requires the PNMs to play according to the rules. e.g. if they can go to 2 preference events and get 2 invites, they must accept both invites and subsequently they must put bot on their pref cards (no suiciding or setting yourself up for only one group). It would be interesting to know how that really works for people. Seems obvious that it would be great for a PNM unless she just simply gets released for any of the groups she would seriously consider. I'm wondering how it works for the chapters as they deal with things like the new release figures ... hmmmm ... something to ponder.

[oldrusheenowmom]

Well-- she went to preference night!!!! Yeah!! She said it was neat- hint: they wore white dresses-- as an AxiD, we wore long blue-- Bids are suppose to come out in about 45 minutes. I hope she calls!!! But most importantly, I am so appreciative of everyone's advice and support. I am so proud of her for "enjoying" the experience, even though she didn't have a lot of parties to attend. I am heading to the card store to find a neat Thank you card for the Rho Gamma!!!

[Lindz928]

Hmm... I know of one group on my campus that wore white for pref.... Wonder if it's the same one?

And kudos to her for making the most of her rush experience! Keeping my fingers crossed for her.

[ISUKappa]

Originally posted by Jhawkalum
ISUKappa -- do you have any idea what ISU's panhellenic policy is for pref night?

bluefish81 would probably know better than I about the current procedures, but I know when I was an active, there was not a guaranteed placement in place. There were women who went bidless due to not matching (not many, maybe 4-6/year) but it did happen. Rho Gammas are taught to discourage SIPing.

[BetteDavisEyes]

White dresses? Now I'm really curious. I don't know much about other groups Pref but I'm definitely excited for her.

[FSUZeta]

fingers crossed for your daughter. she sounds like a great sport.

[ilovemyglo]

The White dresses don't help me any, I know that even AGD was allowed to wear white. On some campuses almost all the chapters do.