Why? Sophomore UGA story - Page 3

aopinthesky · #31 08-19-2008, 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snakealum

1 - Maybe, but she did have 12 solidly on her "very
interested in" list going in. She was cut by all but one after second round.

So are you saying that your daughter did not maximize her options? What I read is that there were 12 groups she would consider which leaves 5 that she would not? If she refused invitations from those 5 then there is not going to be an answer to your questions that you are going to like.

UGAALUM · #32 08-19-2008, 11:21 PM

I know some colleges don't have houses only lodges, but for the ones that do I think living in the house is the best experience I ever had. Back in the day we lived in the house for 2 years because the houses were large and the chapters smaller ( late 1970) You can live in an apartment after you get out of school, but only one time in your life can you live in house. If you don't want to do it why join a sorority? The thing that has amazed me is the number of parents that pay for their daughter to live in the house and then rent an apartment for them. As a Mother why wouldn't you want your daughter to live in the house with a House Mother (no curfew) that allows no alcohol, smoking or boys in the rooms. I know some parents say they can't study, but there are quiet hours and study rooms better than the dorms.

KSUViolet06 · #33 08-19-2008, 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snakealum

"Trust the process, you'll end up where you belong" was the mantra repeated over and over. I now feel like the general telling a mom that the battle went as planned and we won, So sorry your son got killed.

Small detour here:

I'm sorry, but likening recruitment to war is a bit much. Your daughter did not get a bid, and yes, that's hurtful to her and it's hard for you to see her sad, but there is no comparison. Your daughter is still alive.

nittanyalum · #34 08-19-2008, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Small detour here:

I'm sorry, but likening recruitment to war is a bit much. Your daughter ddi not get a bid, and yes, that's hurtful to her and it's hard for you to see her sad, but there is no comparison.

God, no kidding, big co-sign. I haven't heard an explanation why she was rushing as a sophomore either. If she didn't have a 'good reason' for not rushing as a freshman, couldn't that have hurt her too?

pbear19 · #35 08-19-2008, 11:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Small detour here:

I'm sorry, but likening recruitment to war is a bit much. Your daughter did not get a bid, and yes, that's hurtful to her and it's hard for you to see her sad, but there is no comparison. Your daughter is still alive.

THANK YOU for saying that. Not to trivialize any mother's pain if her very close daughter doesn't get into a sorority, but the analogy really went too far there.

#36 08-19-2008, 11:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Small detour here:

I'm sorry, but likening recruitment to war is a bit much. Your daughter did not get a bid, and yes, that's hurtful to her and it's hard for you to see her sad, but there is no comparison. Your daughter is still alive.

Is the OP a mom or a dad? I immediately thought Sigma Nu, but I know the snake's referenced by Sigma Kappa as well.

I was not under the impression that the OP was even the PNM's parent.

alum · #37 08-19-2008, 11:39 PM

The OP doesn't actually say this is her daughter in either of her two posts. It could be her aunt, grandmother, close family friend, older bio. sister...

nittanyalum · #38 08-19-2008, 11:42 PM

Oh, woops, I saw "snakealum" and immediately assumed it was a male and a Sigma Nu. Alum. But I agree, I never read him (her?) describe the person in question as a daughter, but there's obviously some close tie there. (maybe it is an SK alumna that wrote a rec?)

APhiAnna · #39 08-19-2008, 11:42 PM

One scenario that I have seen happen is this: let's say a very qualified upperclasswoman is rushing at a competitive school with five chapters: Alpha, Beta, Gamma, Delta, Eta. Alpha, Beta and Gamma are competitive chapters and Delta and Eta are less competitive. After round #1, each woman has to narrow it down to 3 chapters. Based on her outstanding resume, grades, etc. she may be invited back to Alpha, Beta and Gamma for the next round. Therefore she drops Delta and Eta. For the next round, however, Alpha, Beta and Gamma decide cut the vast majority of upperclasswomen and our PNM is one of them. She has no bid. Delta and Eta may have been extremely excited to have her.

While obviously the new release figure methods and upperclasswomen quotas help eliminate the chance of this happening I think this could be one way that an amazing upperclasswoman receives no bid. It's a very simplified example but I think it gets my point across.

KSUViolet06 · #40 08-19-2008, 11:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alum

The OP doesn't actually say this is her daughter in either of her two posts. It could be her aunt, grandmother, close family friend, older bio. sister...

Oh ok, didn't see that. My original comment still holds though. War and recruitment are incomparable.

pbear19 · #41 08-19-2008, 11:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nittanyalum

Oh, woops, I saw "snakealum" and immediately assumed it was a male and a Sigma Nu.

How funny, when I saw the name I immediately assumed it was a mom and a Sigma Kappa.

irishpipes · #42 08-19-2008, 11:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by APhiAnna

One scenario that I have seen happen is this: let's say a very qualified upperclasswoman is rushing at a competitive school with five chapters: Alpha, Beta, Gamma, Delta, Eta. Alpha, Beta and Gamma are competitive chapters and Delta and Eta are less competitive. After round #1, each woman has to narrow it down to 3 chapters. Based on her outstanding resume, grades, etc. she may be invited back to Alpha, Beta and Gamma for the next round. Therefore she drops Delta and Eta. For the next round, however, Alpha, Beta and Gamma decide cut the vast majority of upperclasswomen and our PNM is one of them. She has no bid. Delta and Eta may have been extremely excited to have her.

While obviously the new release figure methods and upperclasswomen quotas help eliminate the chance of this happening I think this could be one way that an amazing upperclasswoman receives no bid. It's a very simplified example but I think it gets my point across.

Excellent illustration. She maximized her options, they were just the wrong ones.

texas*princess · #43 08-19-2008, 11:52 PM

Dear OP:

Membership selection is confidential. We cannot tell you why your daughter/cousin/whoever did not get a bid. You have to understand that your daughter is ONE girl in a SEA of equally or "more qualified" (in the chapter's eyes) women who are all vying for the same spots. Maybe she got overlooked? Maybe she said something crazy on accident during rush parties? Maybe she didn't get cut b/c of her status? We don't know that. Also, I'd recommend reading the link in OTW's signature.

KSUViolet06 · #44 08-20-2008, 12:57 AM

^^^ I agree. At the end of the day, we can speculate, but no one can tell you for sure why your friend/daughter/sister/whoever was cut.

We weren't there to see her interact with the chapters, nor were we in the room when the chapters were making their membership decisions.

Cuts are tough for the girls and their friends/families who have to comfort them, but at the end of the day, college (and life) goes on. Rejection is tough for anyone, and probably even moreso for young college aged women who have been successful at everything else.

The best thing we can do is say that we're sorry things didn't work out. The best thing you can do as a friend/mom/aunt/whomever is encourage her to enjoy the rest of her college experience, whether that means looking into COB opportunities (if there are any at UGA) or just forgeting about Greek Life, getting involved elsewhere, and moving on.

breathesgelatin · #45 08-20-2008, 01:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snakealum

1 - Maybe, but she did have 12 solidly on her "very
interested in" list going in. She was cut by all but one after second round.

Given this scenario, I think you have your answer as to why she did not get a bid. She did not maximize her options. Perhaps if she had stuck with recruitment for the one group that invited her back to second rounds, she might have received a bid. We'll never know though.