Frat Life is not what it's cracked up to be

[mulattogyrl]

I'm sorry this is your experience. This wasn't/isn't my experience at all.

[1908Revelations]

Originally Posted by Senusret I

It's a marriage -- you MAKE it work.

Thank you!

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by APhiAlien1996

What I'm about to say, I'm sure many of you wanted to say but didn't. Speaking from my experience as an Alpha man, other greeks can add on to this as well. Here in Atlanta, you have many big wigs of corporations that have key positions at their jobs. When I try to network with these bruhs, it's the same old same old story. 1) Exchange numbers, call the the bruh, he never answers/and or don't call back. 2) Give 'em your resume, never hear back from them, or they give you that "my hands are tied" crap. 3) Email bruhs, never get a reply. 4) I've been stranded on the side of the road, flashers on, hood up, and another Alpha will see the tags/para. on your car and keep rolling. Ain't that some garbage? Oh, and let's not forget, bruhs see you somewhere and both of you got on Alpha gear, they don't even speak. So what I'm really saying is that Alphas be acting shady to one another and yes, I am airing out some dirty laundry. Then active brothers want to know why other brothers don't become financial or participate in events.

So I ask, why is this happening bruhs? Can anyone in other orgs. relate and has this happened to you as well? I thought fraternity/sorority life was about helping one another.

Have you ever considered that it may be *your* approach to your frat brothers that may be a turn off. I mean, if you are standing there like, 'I'm an Alpha, you're an Alpha, so gimme a job dammit', then yeah, your brothers will not be bothered because they probabaly feel as if they are being used. No one wants to feel used for any reason under any circumstance.

You also need to think about what your expectations were when you joined? Did you expect Alpha to be the answeres to all of your life questions / issues?

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

You also need to think about what your expectations were when you joined? Did you expect Alpha to be the answers to all of your life questions / issues?

Alpha was the answer to all of my life's questions. Unfortunately, the answer was "No."

ba dum bum

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

Have you ever considered that it may be *your* approach to your frat brothers that may be a turn off.

But seriously folks, this is an excellent point. I am not at all likely to help out a brother who feels entitled. (There goes that word again!)

Early in 06, a group of Alpha Authors got together to help each other promote our work.

Later in 06, after Centennial, we expanded that vision into the Alpha Renaissance. Now we have a yahoo group of 200 brothers who are in all aspects of the arts: literature, comedy, acting, producing, modeling, sculpting, para designers, all that.

We saw a need where Alpha as an institution wasn't necessarily invested in our particular career paths, so we found each other and made a way.

It's funny how the fraternity itself inspired us to reach out to each other, and now we not only help each other, but we are finding ways to help Alpha, but with an artistic slant.

[ladygreek]

Originally Posted by APhiAlien1996

No. I chose to put it here and yes I did air out some dirty laundry, and I won't apologize for it either. This goes for everybody. Some of you missed the whole picture of what I wrote. Some of you just got diarrhea of the mouth and started running off about leaning on shields and financial and obligations. Neither one of those words were ever typed in the original post. This is the bottom line....people (frat brothers) try to use you with the fraternity crap about giving, giving, giving to the organization. Everything should not be about money all the time. Some of us are broke and don't have money, but those of us that are broke we can help out in other ways (time and effort). But should you need a helping hand, all of that talk goes out the window and you are left standing on you own. Don't get me wrong, houses of worship fit into this category as well. This isn't about a brother owing another brother a job. But, if you know something and you know someone is a need, turn that cat on to what's going on. that was my whole point. So, if my bruhs or anyone else feel offended.. tough tits. Get over it!!

Then save yourself the stress and FORMALLY denounce.

[Phrozen1ne]

Maybe you should look at your orginal post brother. Your right, if you are able to help someone then help, but people aren't always in a position to do so, so get over it.

Originally Posted by APhiAlien1996

No. I chose to put it here and yes I did air out some dirty laundry, and I won't apologize for it either. This goes for everybody. Some of you missed the whole picture of what I wrote. Some of you just got diarrhea of the mouth and started running off about leaning on shields and financial and obligations. Neither one of those words were ever typed in the original post. This is the bottom line....people (frat brothers) try to use you with the fraternity crap about giving, giving, giving to the organization. Everything should not be about money all the time. Some of us are broke and don't have money, but those of us that are broke we can help out in other ways (time and effort). But should you need a helping hand, all of that talk goes out the window and you are left standing on you own. Don't get me wrong, houses of worship fit into this category as well. This isn't about a brother owing another brother a job. But, if you know something and you know someone is a need, turn that cat on to what's going on. that was my whole point. So, if my bruhs or anyone else feel offended.. tough tits. Get over it!!

[AKA_Monet]

HAYLE, as much beat down as my father had OLD SCHOOL in 1958... And let's not talk about Bricks in Bags that had to be carried...

HAYLE, one of my dad's friends named "Bang Bang" wanted to be XYZ fraternity, got pissy drunk... So, XYZ fraternity said, if he catches the bird in the room, he can pledge... All night, he couldn't catch the bird. But, when XYZ opened the door, Bang Bang ran out, got a broom and killed the bird... XYZ said he couldn't pledge...

HAYLE, I know MoFo's that got whooped if they didn't bring food.

Is that the kinna experience you want, cuz I know some hazemasters where, when you gave up all of that for your letters, you don't regret them...

Now, leave if you want to, folks don't care. But, I know for a fact the Alphas ended their old method of intake to the "new" one to eliminate death defying hazing.

Folks cannot afford $2000+ high dues anymore.

[APhiAlien1996]

Huhh? What are talking about?

[APhiAlien1996]

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

HAYLE, as much beat down as my father had OLD SCHOOL in 1958... And let's not talk about Bricks in Bags that had to be carried...

HAYLE, one of my dad's friends named "Bang Bang" wanted to be XYZ fraternity, got pissy drunk... So, XYZ fraternity said, if he catches the bird in the room, he can pledge... All night, he couldn't catch the bird. But, when XYZ opened the door, Bang Bang ran out, got a broom and killed the bird... XYZ said he couldn't pledge...

HAYLE, I know MoFo's that got whooped if they didn't bring food.

Is that the kinna experience you want, cuz I know some hazemasters where, when you gave up all of that for your letters, you don't regret them...

Now, leave if you want to, folks don't care. But, I know for a fact the Alphas ended their old method of intake to the "new" one to eliminate death defying hazing.

Folks cannot afford $2000+ high dues anymore.

Hu? What are you talking about?

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by APhiAlien1996

Hu? What are you talking about?

Where you in charge of something or a project in your chapter and "they--the old guard" did not help you and you were at your wits end? You asked for help from someone that you thought was on your side, and he failed to follow through with you?

Let me be CLEAR: It is this hustle and it is a matter of how hard you want to play it... The only way you are assured of learning this hustle is by pledging it. Since they did it to my father, who is an Alpha Man, they dayum sho are gonna do it to you... I would not say EVERY chapter, I would say, that is how we Black folks operate. For some reason it works for us.

If what I said is true, then did you follow protocol? Did you print flyers? Did you actively invite? What did you do to ensure your success rate?

I have a VERY similar situation. I was alienated from a huge SIGNIFICANT project for the chapter. They wanted it done, only I stepped up to serve. I got 1 month to pull it off with NO budget. The key issue is they had NO IDEA WHO THEY were dealing with... I am an EXCELLENT NEGOTIATOR for corporate interactions. I can get corporations to give me money relatively easily... I am not joking. I learned in 20 years ago in college, from Amnesty International to my college chapter. Practice makes perfect.

Now it has been my chapter has been doing this activity for 3 years and I have upped the ante.

The problem is your Brothers in your chapter do not understand your project. That means you need to write it out--or spell it out formally... For my project, I got a local grant, that increased my clout... You need to find what increases YOUR clout...

PM me if you have further questions.

[Jody]

Soror AKA Monet,

I think the OP "project" was the hook up for a job...FOR HIM! Thats why he doesn't understand that when approaching OLD SCHOOL brothers yous gotta to come CORRECT... yous just can't roll up on somebody and say "hook me up" cuz you got some letters, they have GOT TO SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE since yous had them letters..

that's why he doesn't understand your post...

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by Jody

Soror AKA Monet,

I think the OP "project" was the hook up for a job...FOR HIM! Thats why he doesn't understand that when approaching OLD SCHOOL brothers yous gotta to come CORRECT... yous just can't roll up on somebody and say "hook me up" cuz you got some letters, they have GOT TO SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE since yous had them letters..

that's why he doesn't understand your post...

You are right Soror J... He did say he handed his resume and folks said they would call back. Didn't happen...

[ladygreek]

Originally Posted by Jody

Soror AKA Monet,

I think the OP "project" was the hook up for a job...FOR HIM! Thats why he doesn't understand that when approaching OLD SCHOOL brothers yous gotta to come CORRECT... yous just can't roll up on somebody and say "hook me up" cuz you got some letters, they have GOT TO SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE since yous had them letters..

that's why he doesn't understand your post...

AKA Monet is sleep deprived from last night.

*waving at Monet*

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by ladygreek

AKA Monet is sleep deprived from last night.

*waving at Monet*

You know that I NEVER sleep!!! Actually, my husband snores all night long...