My Rush

[blueangel]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

I'll ask again, because no one answered... What about those like me... I went to school not thinking about joining a sorority and went through on my mom's wishes and realized I was wrong about the stereotypes.

Is there no place for women like that at some of these schools?

Some PNMs aren't PNMS until the last day of signup for rush.

That is another excellent point! I guess those women have to then go through informal rush. Personally, I think the playing field needs to be leveled.
It's looking to me like it's not who you are, but who you know and if your mom happens to have a lot of friends in sororities.

[adpiucf]

Originally Posted by blueangel

You're missing my point. How does one get recs when one knows NOBODY in a GLO? It seems that people who are "geographically challenged" in this manner now have the disadvantage of having to pester people on the internet who they've never even met! And doesn't having strangers write you a rec defeat the whole purpose for a rec?

It may be hard to believe for those of you who live in areas where it's a big deal.. but I literally knew no one in a GLO. Now that I'm back up in the northeast --I still literally know NOBODY who has ever been a part of a GLO outside of my alumnae chapter. It just isn't big here.

It isn't hard to believe. In the northeast, sorority life is very different. My cousin is an AOII at Cornell and my best friend is a Tri-Sigma from Penn State. We've had many discussions about the differences in campus culture.

If you attend a college with a history of "competitve recruitment" in the south and you want to rush a sorority, you need recs. That is what Alumnae Panhellenics are for. There are AP's all over the US. Although you may not know anyone in your area who is an alum of a GLO, this doesn't mean they don't exist.

And no, having strangers write you recs doesn't defeat the purpose. Recs are paperwork. Letters of support are helpful to supplement the recommendation. Here in Texas, the AP's conduct annual workshops with high school seniors and their parents to make sure the PNM's get their recs and letters in. Not all AP's are as zealous.

Just because recs aren't big in the northeast doesn't mean that they aren't big in the south. And I'm sorry, but if one is going to use the excuse "Well, I'm from Philly. I am rushing at Auburn, and I think that because I don't know any sorority alumnae you should cut me a break because I didn't take the time to get recs." So what? Everyone else did her homework.

And plenty of southern PNM's have to "pester" strangers for recs on the internet and in real life, too.

If you are a PNM and you want to go through recruitment, take the time to learn about the process at your school. If you're truly interested, you will take the time to take the steps necessary to ensure you put your best foot forward. Why is that such a difficult concept to comprehend?

The fact remains: Recs are still very important on some campuses and will likely continue to be important on those campuses. There are more than enough resources for PNM's to find recs. They need to start early, maintain good communication and follow-up and take responsibility for themselves. The same is true of getting a job-- how often is it "who you know" that gets your foot in the door? Very frequently. Should we also even the playing field among college students and forbid them from taking SAT prep courses because not everyone has access to the same study aids? We can cry that it's not fair, but guess what-- that's life. If you do the work on the back end, you'll improve your standing.

I'm stepping off my soapbox now. This is supposed to be a PNM's recruitment story, and not a debate over why recs exist.

[blueangel]

We'll just have to disagree on this point. I think recommendations from a total stranger is a time and effort on both sides. Let's look at this in the context of the work place. If I'm hiring someone, I want to have a recommendation from someone who has worked with the prospective employee-- not a stranger who has no idea what his or her working habits are like.

I also don't think you're understanding my point. When you come from the north east, and nobody you have ever known has ever been a member of a GLO, chances are, you're not going to be frothing at the bit to join one.

All I knew about GLOs was from what I saw in the movie "Animal House." I didn't have a very high opinion of sororities and fraternities because I didn't know anything about them other than from what I saw in the movies.

You are making a big assumption when you say that women need to do all this research before going to a big sorority school. You're assuming that they want to belong to one before knowing anything about them, and you're assuming that even if they DO know about them, that they would know where to go for this research.

In my case, I transferred to UF and didn't get interested in a sorority until I was exposed to them truly by accident. A friend who I met at UF begged me to go with her to keep her company during rush. Honestly, I didn't even know what rush was! I had never heard the term. I had no intentions of joining, because I had met a gang of friends in the dorm, and just didn't see the point. Ignorance is bliss.

But, after going to a few rush parties with my friend, I was so impressed by what I learned about these groups, that I found myself wanting to be a part of them. Fortunately for me, recs were not required when I was at UF, and I was invited back without them... and got a bid without one.

I think it's truly unfortunate that women who have no exposure to the Greek system prior to going to college find that they're at a big disadvantage should they decide to join one once they're there.

Maybe fraternities have a better system of rushing. It seems to be more fair.

[carnation]

...and now let's get back to the subject of this PNM's rush!

[Drolefille]

I'd like to see recs count for MUCH less at some schools. I'd rather that girls be judged by themselves than by their ability to get someone to write a letter. That makes it a judgement of their family/friends- and Mom's former roommate's cousin's fellow JWA member- and not much else.

Yeah there's still a lot of other things going on, and I don't want to switch to the way guys do it. I like the rules being in place because I KNOW how much cheating there would be if there wasn't.