Men and unplanned pregnancies - Page 3

valkyrie · #31 03-09-2006, 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by OhioCentaur
Your making excuses for people who participate in sex and cant handle what happens when you have sex. Its just that easy. There is a consequence for EVERYTHING you do, so if your so afraid of popping kids out dont do what it takes to create them. Your saying "oh its so difficult to get fixed so i'll just use the fact that i dont want any as an excuse to keep doing what i know will one day cause me to have kids if i'm not careful and even if i'm careful it could still happen". And dont let my AGE fool you dear. Just because you may be twice or 3 times my age doesnt make you exempt from the fact that if you dont want kids dont do what it takes to have them. If you are going to do it know that you may have kids its just that plain and simple.

And i'll laugh at your meager attempt to talk about MY experiences... but hey if thats how you feel then so be it... MY WHOLE arguement is people should not use what they want as an excuse to continue to do what they know will cause them what they dont want. If you dont want lung cancer dont smoke... yes its true you may get it from being around those that smoke but those are circumstances you can NOT control... You may not feel what i'm saying and thats all well and good, i didnt respond to the thread to get your stamp of approval, nor will it stop my flow so there is that tidbit for ya.

I'm not directly telling you to not have sex... just dont complain and kill a child because you got what you deserved for having sex.

You got what you deserved? Oh wow. So an unwanted child is punishment? Is that what your God teaches?

The reason I'm really missing your point is that you seem to think that you get to tell women not to have abortions. You don't. Your authority over the female population = 0.

Also, since when is having an abortion not handling the consequences of having sex? It is. It's just handling it in a manner of which you don't approve. You're really saying that people must deal with the consequences of sex in a way you consider acceptable. Do you see why people might have a problem with that?

preciousjeni · #32 03-09-2006, 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
Also, since when is having an abortion not handling the consequences of having sex? It is. It's just handling it in a manner of which you don't approve. You're really saying that people must deal with the consequences of sex in a way you consider acceptable. Do you see why people might have a problem with that?

You're right on this point. I am personally totally against abortion, but that stems from my religious beliefs - and that's why I wouldn't attempt to ban abortions. Still to me, abortion is irresponsible and selfish.

James · #33 03-09-2006, 04:40 PM

I think the pendulum has swung so far into the favor of women on this issue that their needs to be some balance restored.

Here are a couple of extreme examples of men being held responsible for children. I'm using extreme examples to show how biased the legal system is in these cases.

Here the man is paying 800 dollars a month for a child the woman conceived by saving his sperm from oral sex.

http://greekchat.com/gcforums/showth...=child+support

Here a sperm donor is forced to pay 1500 dollars a month.

http://greekchat.com/gcforums/showth...=child+support

KSig RC · #34 03-09-2006, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
You got what you deserved? Oh wow. So an unwanted child is punishment? Is that what your God teaches?

The reason I'm really missing your point is that you seem to think that you get to tell women not to have abortions. You don't. Your authority over the female population = 0.

Also, since when is having an abortion not handling the consequences of having sex? It is. It's just handling it in a manner of which you don't approve. You're really saying that people must deal with the consequences of sex in a way you consider acceptable. Do you see why people might have a problem with that?

If I were to engage in sexual activity and produce an offspring against my best efforts to the opposite, I will certainly take personal responsibility - I will personally hand over money to have it purged from the uterus.

Honeykiss1974 · #35 03-09-2006, 04:42 PM

Didn't something similiar happen to a player in the NFL/NBA? Him and a buddy had sex with a girl and she dug the condoms out the trash and "inpregnated" herself?

OhioCentaur · #36 03-09-2006, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
Being pro-life or pro-choice really isn't the issue here - its PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY for your actions, which seems to be in lack nowadays.

I think everyone on earth knows that if you have sex, there is a possibility that you will get pregnant or inpregnate someone. If you do not want to become pregnant (or inpregnate someone) there are things you can do to reduce or eliminate this from happening. That's not a point of view or political belief, that's life.

The question is (and point of the article) should men be allowed to simply "walk away" from this responsibility or have a "say" in the outcome, regardless if the pregnancy was on purpose or accidential?

Hell no... regardless if a woman can or cant a man should be a man and step the hell up. Now the only problem with that is good guys get caught by chicks who want to trap them with babies... but if you stay zipped up you wont slip up!

OhioCentaur · #37 03-09-2006, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
Also, since when is having an abortion not handling the consequences of having sex? It is. It's just handling it in a manner of which you don't approve. You're really saying that people must deal with the consequences of sex in a way you consider acceptable. Do you see why people might have a problem with that?

valid point... i did overlook that in my heat of rage excuse me

valkyrie · #38 03-09-2006, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by OhioCentaur
valid point... i did overlook that in my heat of rage excuse me

LOL no problem -- it's a hot issue.

wrigley · #39 03-09-2006, 05:09 PM

Deadbeat birth fathers did exist and will continue to do so even after paternity is proven true. It's only recently that women have been exercising their rights to sue for financial support. The women aren't getting much money after the state takes their cut.

Prior to Roe v. Wade and the widespread distribution of birth control for women,there were "homes" set up across the country where unwed pregnant women and girls were sent off to give birth and give up the baby for adoption. The birth father was either out of the picture or marriage was not a option. The stigma was that they had "loose" morals. They certainly didn't get that way by themselves.

If we are going to be "pro-life" then more than abstinence needs to be included in sex education. An unwanted pregmancy isn't the only thing that can result in unprotected sex. It's not like mr. happy changes colors if he has a std.

OhioCentaur · #40 03-09-2006, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by wrigley
It's not like mr. happy changes colors if he has a std.

hahah it does if you get the right one! lmao... well i apologize if i've offended anyone with my statements but i take deadbeat fathers serious because thats a serious issue... i hate just hate to see that.

CarolinaCutie · #41 03-09-2006, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jubilance1922
So since you're pro-life, that means that you are or will be a foster parent and/or adoptive parent right?

I'm dying to hear the logic on this one.

And I agree with Honeykiss

GeekyPenguin · #42 03-09-2006, 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by KSig RC
If I were to engage in sexual activity and produce an offspring against my best efforts to the opposite, I will certainly take personal responsibility - I will personally hand over money to have it purged from the uterus.

A gentleman and a scholar.

OhioCentaur · #43 03-09-2006, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jubilance1922
So since you're pro-life, that means that you are or will be a foster parent and/or adoptive parent right?

Having lived as a foster child to becoming a adopted child you dang right i plan on fostering and or adopting atleast one. I feel that since i was blessed there is no reason why i cant forward those blessings. I tip my hat to all foster parents and adoptive parents who do it out of love and not as a source of income. I also salute those social workers who treat it as their ministry and not just a job to pay bills... call it hypocritical but i feel social work just like teaching is a job that REQUIRES passion.

AKA_Monet · #44 03-09-2006, 10:20 PM

Aside from Ohiocentaur's situation, is there any man or woman who has had an unplanned pregnancy and were unmarried?

Until there is someone here other than who I already know who has had an unplanned, unmarried preganancy and decided to either abort, adopt or raise the child, either as a single parent or opted for marriage, then we can have all the opinions we want... But until that's our situation, no one can say what they will or will not do.

There are a few old GC-ers who it has happened to. They could share the situation if they feel up to it. I am not interested in blasting them, but everyone can do a search.

My own situation, I was involved with someone who got another woman pregnant--no one was married... I know she did it for financial reasons and biological clock reasons. He was just a drunk. Watching this event unfold pains me even today and I cannot explain it logically to my husband. I have had to put up defense mechanisms in my relationships to guard against ever being hurt like that again.

But these things happen all the time. Friends, of mine trapped their husbands like that. Hayle, I may have a cousin that just had a classic shotgun wedding... And I have seen guys walk out on the woman leaving her to rear the child alone--and this occurs to teenage women as well as older women at the same rate, married and unmarried.

So either way, no matter what rules get instituted, the fact is biological, that is the way the court sees it. And what is the best interests of the child. I think it is foul that women play these games, but it is equally foul that both did the do and now the guy doesn't want the responsibility...

I just cannot understand why some men can be so heartless to their offspring no matter how they got here... I mean spiritually speaking, it is foul, how can someone have a disconnect when it is thought that the very essence of one's soul is encrypted in the genetic inheritance? That these ill described human "pheremones" if there is such a thing, are transferred from parent to offspring--meaning that it is genetic. So to deny that is universally foul and one ought not be granted the ability to form life into a soul. But who am I? Most folks don't follow my logic. Oh well...

texas*princess · #45 03-09-2006, 10:24 PM

If a guy doesn't want to have the responsibility of raising a child, he should insist on bagging it up before having sex. Period. End of story.

Or better yet, don't have sex at all.

When you do anything in life, sex included, you go into it knowing what possible repercussions might happen.