Young Alumni....Still in the mix?

[Little E]

Wow you have all made me a little nervous. I graduated in May from a school in Wisconsin and promptly moved to Philly. I, yesterday, bought a ticket to go back for homecoming which is not a huge deal at all. It feels kinda funny to be going back. My decision was really based on the fact that I have four of my best friends who will be there (two alumnae, two active) so it will be a great opportunity to see people but the whole being an alumna thing feels intimidating. I've been very very good at not giving advise (i broke once, but it was a HUGE thing) but I'm still worried. These are my best friends and other very close friends...does me graduating change how I have to interact w/them? I just dunno...

[33girl]

Originally posted by Little E
These are my best friends and other very close friends...does me graduating change how I have to interact w/them? I just dunno...

NO!!!!!

Homecoming is a weekend for alums to have fun. You're not there to advise them or anything else. You're there to have fun. So don't worry about it.

[CarolinaCutie]

Originally posted by Little E
Wow you have all made me a little nervous. I graduated in May from a school in Wisconsin and promptly moved to Philly. I, yesterday, bought a ticket to go back for homecoming which is not a huge deal at all. It feels kinda funny to be going back. My decision was really based on the fact that I have four of my best friends who will be there (two alumnae, two active) so it will be a great opportunity to see people but the whole being an alumna thing feels intimidating. I've been very very good at not giving advise (i broke once, but it was a HUGE thing) but I'm still worried. These are my best friends and other very close friends...does me graduating change how I have to interact w/them? I just dunno...

I agree with 33girl- there's a big difference between coming to Homecoming and coming out every Wednesday and Thursday night to fraternity Late Nights. I'm sure everyone will be really excited to see you!

[Little E]

I know we'll have fun. The stories of how you have to change your interaction (I guess I do realize that is ment towards advising) still kinda is about being an alumna. Homecoming is way low key and they actually have one of our alumnae doing the semester check-up at that time. (Our alumane group does a check-in weekend once a semester w/the chapter to make sure everything from finances to drama is cool, and to keep the alumnae in the mix) I never thought it would be strange to go back. Thanks for your support though! It is kinda funny how once you have a job, it is hard to take those drunken dials at like 2am...

[PhiStar]

I still live in the same city as the chapter. Its nice for recruitment, they always welcome the help. (and the brownies hehe)
I went to their family day event just this past weekend too. One of our Phi's that I recently befriended (she reminds me exactly of myself when i was a phi!!how cool!!) asked me if i would be going to the XYZ something (cookout?) this week and i was like, I would love to see those guys again (because i still know some of the guys) but Alum aren't really invited. But its part of informal, so technically if i wanted to i could attend.
Who knows, i talked to one of the guys the other day and he told me to come too. haha. My friends don't want to let me go (thank god!)

I like being around, and hanging with the girls, i just graduated, so i know most of them anyway, but if they invite me out, i'll go out wiht them, sometimes i see them out and it is always fun. I'm just down the street and they told me i can make my fabulous 7 layer salad or brownies and stop over anytime.

i know i am not the only one living around here. i was thinking about starting a chapter association, since so many alumnae are around the area.


taualumna, {""for example, phi mu does not allow collegiates and actives to participate in an activity with alcohol present"
} did you mean collegiates and alumnae?

[Tom Earp]

Worried, why?

I just got back this weekend from a fun filled and packed time.

Saw some Brothers that I have not seen for some time and had a ball!

Oh, I have been doing this since 1965!

Woory? As Alfred E Newman said "What, Me Worry"?

Go, enjoy, and have a great time. No matter how many were there, it is always good to see the Oldsters and the Newbies!

[AXWhoah]

This thread is far and away my favorite. It is so nice to hear that other people are going through the same stuff as me. I graduated May 2004 and being alum is like going through withdrawl from some major dependancy that you just gave up. I actually missed recruitment this year, I wished I was there even though I always really hated it cause I always ended up way to stressed and tired at the end of the week.
It's really hard for me because my boyfriend is still in school and is the social chair of his fraternity and hangs out with his frat brothers ALL the time. And right now I am in town visiting and I feel like the lame old person (even though I am only 22, how sad is that!) cause everyone else is in school and people will ask me what year I am and I have to say that I am done. That's the worst part, I look and sound younger than I am so if people don't ask then they just assume that I am still in school.
In AX we used to talk about the younger alumni of any group (ours, frats, etc) that didn't really go away. You know the ones, the ones who come to all the parties, date dashes, etc even though they have graduated. We loved them and all but it was a running joke that they were "sketch alum" and though I am in town (like I said) I haven't so much as driven by my sorority house for fear of being labled sketch alum.
Blah Blah Blah, I'm rambling. Basically my point was that it's kinda sad, hard, whatever being a new alumni and it's good to see that other are in my shoes.

[AXWhoah]

Oh yeah....for AChiOAlumna, for whatever reason my computer won't let me PM so could you PM me I want to ask you about your alumni chapter....

[AChiOAlumna]

Originally posted by AXWhoah
I graduated May 2004 and being alum is like going through withdrawl from some major dependancy that you just gave up. I actually missed recruitment this year, I wished I was there even though I always really hated it cause I always ended up way to stressed and tired at the end of the week.

Blah Blah Blah, I'm rambling. Basically my point was that it's kinda sad, hard, whatever being a new alumni and it's good to see that other are in my shoes.

As an alumna who just watched another brand, new alumna have difficulty with Recruitment this year, can I offer you peace of mind that you were probably wise beyond your years that you didn't attend Recruitment this year. I witnessed a young alumna pacing behind the scenes this year wanting to get out on the floor and participate in talking to the PNMs, wanting to speak with collegiates about members and wanting to participate in selection. We really had to contain her while she nearly crawled out of her skin...the rest of the alumnae are removed by several years (I've been alum since 1991 and I'm the oldest!) and can focus on what needs to be done as an alum.

It's okay that you had to step back...it's probably healthier for you and the chapter and you know that you'll be back to support the chapter again...for now, give yourself the chance to adjust to your new role as an AXO alum and enjoy it...it's for the rest of your life!

[hannahgirl]

Originally posted by AChiOAlumna
As an alumna who just watched another brand, new alumna have difficulty with Recruitment this year, can I offer you peace of mind that you were probably wise beyond your years that you didn't attend Recruitment this year. I witnessed a young alumna pacing behind the scenes this year wanting to get out on the floor and participate in talking to the PNMs, wanting to speak with collegiates about members and wanting to participate in selection. We really had to contain her while she nearly crawled out of her skin...the rest of the alumnae are removed by several years (I've been alum since 1991 and I'm the oldest!) and can focus on what needs to be done as an alum.

It's okay that you had to step back...it's probably healthier for you and the chapter and you know that you'll be back to support the chapter again...for now, give yourself the chance to adjust to your new role as an AXO alum and enjoy it...it's for the rest of your life!

I was so glad that I wasn't like that! I went alum in Dec 03 and skipped participating in Spring Recruitment, which ended up being very helpful! Being the last recruitment chair, I had to train the new recruitment chairs (yes I said plural....we had a total of 4 throughout the year!!) so there was no way that I couldn't be heavily involved.
I went back for formal recruitment last month and was able to act as an advisor of sorts which got me out of the collegiate perspective. I made sure, however, that I didn't go to selection. I stayed upstairs so I wouldn't get myself engrossed into it.

Just taking a semester off of it helps a great deal!

[Boodleboy322]

KTSnake,

You and I graduated the same year and I've gotten some great info. starting back years before on GC from you.

Best Wishes!

Boodleboy322

Originally posted by ktsnake
I graduated back in '02. Since then, I've become a member of the chapter advisory board and deal with both the chapter's Honor Council (like standards board) and Financial issues. The two areas often go hand in hand.

I've had to kind of redefine how I can hang out with these guys. There obviously aren't any guys left that were around when I joined the colony -- in fact, there are only a few former colonists left in the chapter.

There has been a great deal of change since we received our charter and our roles as alums have been chaning along with the chapter. We've set up a house corporation, an Alumni Chapter and an Advisory Board. Yeah, we still hang out. A lot of us show up for Rush from as far away as Dallas (which is about a 3 1/2 hour drive). We still have a good time with them.

I on occasion will buy an active a beer, go out to the bar with a few of 'em, etc.. These days, you won't see me participating in chugging contests or anything of that nature (if that stuff ever happened anymore). I don't usually hang out at parties too late, etc.

-- It's a fairly unique situation we have where we essentially are able to define what an alum is and does where our chapter is concerned.

[Tom Earp]

Oh yes, We have had the same thing happen many times.

New Grads/Alums feel closer to The Actives and try to harbor them from the big bad alums.

One after finally 4 years finds out He is an Alum and Not An Active.

Being Active and Alum are two different things. But, that is not to say as an Alum, You are still not active in The Chapter.

Remember, We are Alums and have been there and done it and trying to pass along information that will help keep the Atives out of pit falls that We all did.

LXA requires an Alum Advisory Board and an ADVISOR or insurance rates go up.

While most Chapters feel they can and will run on their own, who do they call when in need?

I have been doing this 40 years now and amazing how much S--t Chapters get in and dont know what to do!!!!!!!

Dont try to run dailey things but try to advise when you see something that is wrong or be a mediator.

That is all, damn is snowing like hell in KC!

[annice22]

I might not live in the same city anymore but I can still help out by the use of a computer by updating the alumni with information.

I try to stay close to the chapter the best way that I can.

[opaldragon]

Originally posted by pinkyphimu

it is great to get to know the actives and be a support, but there are lots of ways to support a chapter!

oh, today i had a conversation about some alumnae who graduated recently who don't seem to realize that they graduated. this particular chapter is frustrated because they keep showing up to meetings, want to come to parties, etc. and the chapter is like, you are graduated...go away! not that they don't want support, they just don't want the new graduates hanging around telling them what to do...which is what often happens when new graduates keep coming back.

I can understand that chapter's frustration with their recent, younger alumni/ae. My chapter has been going through some very similar things with our recent, young alumnae. While we love them and respect them, they need to realize that they are alumnae and really have no say in the day-to-day dealings of the chapter. They also need to not get butt-hurt about it. I love my chapter and have been pretty heavily involved from the get-go but I don't want to be the 'sketch alum' as someone posted, so I'm starting to distance myself slowly now (about a yr to a yr and a half before graduation) so that I don't get that shock of no involvement when I go alum.

[deltagirlie222]

I guess people who are still in school at the same university might be more involved with their groups. I graduated with my UG degree in 2003, but am at the same school for grad studies. I refuse to go to mixers or anything like that (hehe although the girls always ask me to come) but I do like to help out a lot with recruitment and fundraisers or anything like that. I agree with the person who said it depends how involved a person is as an active. I was very involved (except during my last semester when I had lots of clinicals), so of course I still try and help out sometimes. I actually have become friends with some new actives that I am glad I have gotten a chance to know.