This post is too funny. Here are a few, odd, but ACCEPTABLE names.
Salem Jones (Salem cigarettes)
Ivory Howard (Ivory soap or dishwashing liquid)
Meritta Davis (Meritta bread)
Lane Bryant (enough said, right?)
Cremora Thomas (the coffee creamer)
Nilla Osborne (Nill Wafers)
Catalina Martin (Catalina salad dressing)
Morton Davis (Morton salt)
Celestial S. Henderson (Celestial Seasonings herb tea)
Raman Okbar (one of my favorites for Raman Noodles

)
Reynolds Jordan (Reynolds wrap)
Lipton Hayes (Lipton tea)
Carnation Myers (Carnation Instant Breakfast)
Now these are relatively REASONABLE and SENSABLE names, to say the least. I've got lots of them. Let me check my pantry and cabnets and I'll come back with more.